Always You

Chapter 15: Explain

As Nat finished up with the last widow, she waved Y/N on to catch up with Yelena while she spoke with the agent to make sure everything was set up accordingly.

The trek back to the helicopter was not long but did worry Y/N. Neither they nor Nat had heard from her in now three hours. Hopefully, she actually made it back.

Evening had fallen now and the woods surrounding the flying vehicle were dark. A very faint light could be seen inside, laying Y/N's worries to rest as they made their way to the door.

Rounding the corner into the door though, their forehead was met with the end of a gun.

"Shit," Yelena muttered, "I'm sorry."

She slowly lowered the gun and returned back to the seat she had been in since returning. Her face was stricken with anger the last they'd seen her, but now seemed low.

"What happened back there?" They asked.

But as usual, Yelena steered the conversation elsewhere, "Did you all get the widows freed?"

"We're not doing this," Y/N answered, pushing Yelena to quirk her eyebrow. They sat next to her, pulling the gun from her hand and laying it behind them, "What happened back there?"

Her lungs filled deeply with air as she broke eye contact with Y/N. It was very much not something she wanted to bring up again, but she knew Y/N just wanted to help.

"Do we have to talk about it?" she asked.

They sighed, grabbing her left hand with both of theirs this time, "You don't have to go into detail and we don't have to talk forever. We just need to understand. This can't happen every time. We don't know what we'll be up against, but we were lucky that you storming off didn't leave us stranded with no help."

Yelena hadn't thought about the aftermath. She hadn't thought about anyone coming for them after taking the man down since she knew the agent was on their way. Her eyes widened at the realization, knowing now that she needed to open up.

She ran her fingers over her nails that stuck through the holds of Y/N's hands, "While Nat was on the phone, he started muttering random things in Russian. They were dumb enough to make me laugh until he started talking about Nat..."

Y/N leaned their head over, making sure to listen the best that they could, "What was he saying?"

"Gross things. Horrible things. Stuff he would do to us, behind closed doors. Things our teachers did to us in the Red Room. The things about me I could brush off, but he knew he would get to me as her started talking about what he would do to Nat."

Confused, Y/N tried their best to piece together her story and figure out what things he could have been saying to them. When Yelena looked up and caught their eyebrows furrowed, she knew they didn't understand.

"They would... take advantage of us. A lot."

Without hesitation, Y/N finally understood and slowly moved one hand from their hold of hers to the small of Yelena's back. They rested their forehead on her shoulder, pulling her close, "I'm so sorry. I'm sure that was infuriating. I can understand why you reacted that way."

Yelena leaned over resting her cheek on the top of their head, "Thank you."

The rest of their conversation carried on as Y/N just detailed what they had done to help Nat with the widows until they left her with the agent. It wasn't long after they finished their talk that Nat arrived back, still visibly upset with her sister.

Y/N jumped up quickly grabbing her wrist and asking her to step outside with them.

Yelena sat back as she watched them exit the helicopter. Feeling them with her during all of that calmed her nerves more than she ever thought possible. For the first time in recorded history, she felt safe. Truly safe.

And it was inside Y/N's arms that she felt that way.

Outside, Nat was heating up and wondering why they'd taken her aside, "I need to talk to her. Do you know what could have happened leaving me in there alone?"

"I know-" Y/N started.

"You don't! You don't know! You are trained like we are and leaving me alone to fend for myself if someone had come through was ridiculous!" She yelled, definitely loud enough for her sister to hear.

They took a deep breath before grabbing both of Nat's shoulders and forcing her focus on them, "I know. I talked to her about that and she understood, but she also told me what that man had said to her. Things I didn't know happened to you all, things he wanted to do."

She was confused at first until Y/N watched her eyes drop a bit, "What did he say?"

"I-I don't know exactly. I didn't want Yelena to tell me anything she wasn't comfortable with, but I pieced it together and I'm sure you can too," they finished, pulling Nat into a hug, "I'm so sorry Nat. God, that Red Room was just fucking disgusting."

They felt Nat laugh a bit, "You're just now realizing that?" The two laughed together again while embracing tightly, "Thank you for your help back there and thank you for talking to her. I promise I'll go easy on her."

Y/N smiled, knowing that they were able to relax a possible quarrel that would have broken out between the sisters. God, I hope this isn't something I have to do every single mission, they thought.

The trio spent some of the night relaxing and talking before passing out cold. Y/N was the first to go, knocking out on the floor face down. Nat was shortly after, passed out on the large bench next to the door. Yelena, however, was not as quick.

She spent a good bit of time staring at the ceiling thinking about the events of the day and how her emotions had fluctuated greatly. This morning she had awoken from a beautiful sleep in Y/N's arms, threw herself into a panic when she woke up, spent most of the the ride here anxious, felt happy for a few second in Y/N's arms, furious on the mission, then safe once more in Y/N's arms.

The pattern of positive feelings were clearly wrapped in Y/N's arms, which is where she was staring now. On the floor, their limbs were sprawled out, making Yelena giggle a bit and wonder how anyone would be comfortable sleeping like that.

She contemplated slipping down to the floor and waking them gently just so she could slip under them and be wrapped up once more. Her hand dangled down, letting one finger graze the palm of their hand that was facing up.

Yelena was unaware of how easy it was to wake Y/N, not realizing that this stirred them a bit to realize what she was doing. They felt her finger trace their palm and wondered if they should grab it to let her know they were awake.

She continued tracing in their palm as she slowly let it rise and drift up their arm, to their shoulder, and then their back. Y/N was drifting off again and decided to let her believe they were still knocked out.

As Yelena finished, she rolled to her side on her bench opposite of Nat. While looking down at Y/N, she felt an unexplainable warmth and for the first time, she let it be. A smile grew across her face as she closed her eyes and allowed herself to drift off to sleep now too. 

Not all things have to be worried about, she told herself just before her body fully relaxed and allowed her to have a good night's rest.