Always You

Chapter 37: A Realization

A week had passed since Yelena's surprise for Y/N. They'd spent every other night in the others' apartment. One night at Y/N's, one night at Yelena's. Y/N had even helped her start really decorating.

"You can't just flood your room with plants and call it decor, babe," they noted as they placed the 20th plant on her windowsill.

"Says who?" she asked, readjusting the 19th one she'd sat on her nightstand.

Nat leaned in on Yelena's bedroom door, "I won't say that I agree with them, but you do need more than just plants, Lena."

The nickname had been taken by both of them now and Yelena adored it. Something about it made her feel even more disconnected from her past. Lena was a part of who she was becoming, who she'd always wanted to be.

Yelena rolled her eyes at the two of them before Nat continued, "We'll go shopping for more stuff after work. Both of you need to get ready. I'm heading out in like twenty minutes."

Y/N strolled over from the window to meet her where she stood when Nat left, "You ready for your first day?"

Her eyes opened wide, "I'm nervous. I'm really nervous." Which was understandable. The only line of work she'd ever experienced before her mission with Nat was working FOR the Red Room, not against it. Not only had she just begun finding herself, but now she had to completely switch teams.

It wasn't difficult to do so. She knew it was the right thing to do but it was still scary. Y/N reassured her that it would be okay and that they would just be a floor below her if there was anything she needed.

"You got this. I love you," they reminded her.

Yelena had wondered if saying I love you this much would always be the case. She hoped that this passion between them would never stop burning so bright. Honestly, she couldn't imagine a day when it didn't. The love they felt for each other was insanely overwhelming in the best way possible. She wanted to drown in it forever.

If saying I love you as much as they did was wrong, she never wanted to be right again.

The two jumped into their work clothes and followed Nat down to her car. Yelena spent the car ride looking around as Y/N and Nat pointed out the different parts of the neighborhood. Y/N had taken their seat in the back and let her have the front so that it was easier to see.

"...and this is SHIELD. Ready to go?" Nat looked over from the building as she twisted the key out of the ignition.

Yelena swallowed hard, nervous as ever, "Yeah. Let's go. The quicker I get this first day over with the quicker I get these nerves out."

Y/N opened her door for her to stand from the car and quickly wrapped her in a hug. Whispering in her ear, "You're going to do great. You were made for this."

Pulling back, they saw tears forming in her eyes. Before they could ask, she kissed them firmly on the lips, letting the tears fall. "I love you so much. I know I keep saying it but... but I don't know how I would do any of this without you and Nat."

They smiled, pulling her into another tight hug. There were no words that could adequately explain to her how they felt, but she knew. They both knew and that was what bonded them so tightly. The unspoken feelings were strong enough to radiate without words.

Nat walked in front as she led the two of them into the building, Yelena tightly gripping Y/N's hand. Y/N looked over to see her face and smiled when they saw how in awe she was. Her mouth slightly ajar, eyes open wide. It was much bigger than she'd expected. 

Every room she entered was pristine and shining. They kept every single room as clean as could be and the sparkling proved it. Nat led them to the elevator while jumping on the balls of her feet. She was excited to be back and even more excited to be with her sister and best friend again.

The dinging of the elevator sounded before the doors opened. Before they could step through, they were met with Maria Hill who was stepping out. Her smile was large and her cheeks were starting to turn pink. Y/N's eyes shot open wide knowing what was racing through her mind. They thought about pulling Yelena to whisper and tell her about it, but they didn't want to embarrass Maria or make her uncomfortable.

Maria said her hellos and stepped past. Y/N was surprised she didn't say more but assumed it was due to nerves or the fact that there were people around.

The door started closing when Y/N noticed Maria turn back quickly and slam her hand on one of them, keeping it open. She cleared her throat and looked at Nat, "Hey.. are you.. are you free this week? Maybe for dinner?"

A smile started growing on Nat's face as Yelena and Y/N watched. Yelena knew about her experimenting with her sexuality over in Europe and had even admitted to having a crush on Maria at one point in time. She just thought it was normal and that 'all women had crushes on other women.' Even Yelena, having only a bit of time in the free world, was able to break Nat free of that internalized homophobia.

Y/N watched the corner of Nat's mouth tick up into a smirk, excited to see what her answer might be. They grabbed onto Yelena's hand a bit tighter as she leaned into them, just as excited for Nat as Y/N was.

"Absolutely. I'm free tonight, actually," she answered.

Maria nodded, seemingly trying to take it all in and not react too out of sorts, "Perfect. I'll text you."

Nat smiled back, watching Maria walk away as she let the doors close. The silence in the elevator was killing all three of them until Y/N finally broke into a burst of maniacal laughter, "I FUCKING KNEW IT! I KNEW YOU LIKED WOMEN AND I KNEW YOU HAD SOMETHING FOR HER!"

She smacked Y/N as all three of them laughed on their way up to their respective floors. Y/N had reminded Yelena over and over that they would be more than happy to take her to her floor, but she shoved them off on the 4th floor where they worked. "I'll be fine! Have a good day!"

Y/N scowled but broke into a laugh before the door fully shut. While Yelena did send Y/N off to their floor, she allowed Nat to escort her up to where she'd be working. Nat watched as Yelena picked at the hems of her shirt, trying to calm herself.

"You're going to do great, Lena. I'll make sure I introduce you to my friends up here so they know to take care of you."

"I don't need taken care of, Nat. I'm an adult," Yelena answered a bit roughly.

Nat smiled, knowing she'd annoyed her sister just as she used to when they were kids, "I know you don't, but I want to make sure you hit the ground running and that I have eyes up here if anyone does anything stupid. It's my job to protect you, so get over it."

She rolled her eyes, but truly she was happy to have her sister back, even if it meant she'd fall into those annoying tendencies. Nat took her around the floor and introduced her to everyone she knew. She showed her where she'd be working specifically but reminded her not to get comfortable. This job would require a lot of fieldwork, which meant her desk wouldn't be seen too often.

"I'm gonna head down to my floor, but don't forget we're getting lunch with Y/N, Fitz, and Simmons around 11:30."

Yelena jumped and wrapped her sister in a bone-crunching hug, causing Nat to struggle a laugh through her forced breaths, "I love you. Thank you for everything, Nat. Seriously. I wouldn't be here without you."

When Nat pulled back, tears had formed in her eyes but had not yet fallen, "My God, you and Y/N cry so much and now you're gonna make ME cry! I hate you, I really do."

They both laughed but slowed as Nat pulled her into a hug and whispered, "I'm so proud of you. You've come so far and you did this on your own. I was just there for the ride and it's been the best months of my life watching you grow. I love you too."

"Oh my god get off now before I start sobbing on my first day of work," Yelena said as she pushed off her sister quickly. "That would be so fucking embarrassing."

More laughter erupted before Yelena headed to her boss to start training and Nat entered the elevator to return to her own floor. Yelena smiled on her way to the office in the back, realizing that she'd finally made it. 

Life with a cloud above her had become her normal. She never knew anything different. But now? Now, the sun was shining on her brighter than ever. Life had finally turned in her favor. She was Yelena Belova reinvented.