Frozen Lake (KTH 18+)

Chapter 17 - Take Control

Depressed, you woke up. You weren't due to wake up for another 45 minutes, but you decided to get up anyway. As soon as you withdrew from the bed, you ripped the covers off angrily and carried them to the laundry room. You crammed the sheets into the washer violently, wanting to be rid of that smell quickly. You punched the start button, then walked out.

In the kitchen, you turned on the coffee pot, desperately needing some caffeine to get through this day. You slept like crap. Pouring yourself a cup once it was finished, you downed the warm liquid quickly. Hye had strolled into the kitchen and was surprised to see you already up. "Morning sis, you're up early. Wha! You look like shit!" His eyes were wide as he saw your haggard face. You spent most of the night crying and it was evident. "Gee, thanks." You said sarcastically, a dangerous growl in your voice. "Whoa, okay, sorry." Hye grabbed his coffee and left the room immediately, wanting to preserve his life.

Taking a shower next, you stood under the warm mist. Letting it wash away your drowsiness. You scrubbed your eyes clean; the left-over mascara was caked on your eyelashes. You stepped out of the shower and looked in the mirror. You did look terrible. After applying some makeup, you looked less like death and more like a human.

Not packing a lunch because you barely had an appetite, you left for work without saying anything more to Hye. You weren't in the mood honestly.

You stared out the window from the bookstore, not fully in a coherent state of mind. You watched the happy people walking and running in the park. You sighed deeply and then your phone pinged and your shoulders slumped. Defeated. You just wanted to be left alone.

"Morning baby! Are you at work today?"

You scowled at the message from Taehyung. Him calling you baby made you sick now. How many other women does he call that? You scoffed, annoyed. You texted him back just so he wouldn't come to your work looking for you.

"No."

The last thing you wanted was him to be suspicious that you didn't respond and then show up to find you. You saw Lena coming towards the front door and straightened up. You needed to put on a pleasant face, the one you were wearing right now was intimidating. It wasn't her fault your boyfriend was flirting with other women. Lena smiled brightly when she saw you standing there. "Hi!" She said sweetly and you tried to crack a sincere smile. Watching Lena run to the back as usual, your phone sang again. You pulled it out of your pocket aggressively.

"Okay, want to do something then?"

'No, hell no.'  You thought to yourself. You disregarded it and put your phone up. You really needed to clean the store as you always did. Not performing your daily tasks today, you felt even more pathetic. Now you felt like a bad employee.

Lena approached the counter soon, laying down two more of the books she had out yesterday. You quietly scanned them, putting them in a bag. You could feel Lena's eyes on you. You look up to meet them. "Are...are you okay?" She asks sweetly and you feel the tears appearing in your dry eyes, burning as they moisten them. This was all it took to break you down. For someone to notice that you were not, in fact, okay. Lena leaned on the counter as she saw your tears. "What's wrong?" You covered your face ashamed, not wanting to break down in front of a customer.

"It's nothing, that'll be $18.59." You croak out, trying to sound like you weren't about to break apart. Lena put her hand on yours softly and gave you a small smile. "I'm a good listener." Tears roll down your cheeks as you tell her what happened, what you saw. You changed your story a bit to secure Taehyung's identity, even though he didn't deserve it. You told her about how he was smiling so sweetly at that girl who kissed his cheek.

"Have you confronted him?" Lena questions, her eyebrows furrowed together in worry. You shook your head no. "Then you need to ask him about it. When I read love stories there's always a breaking point in relationships. In books, someone always misinterprets something and the couple fights. Sometimes they get back together and sometimes they don't. But this isn't a book, this is your life. Grab a hold of it and take control." You stared at her as she spoke. The was the most you had ever heard her speak. She seemed very wise.

"Thank you, Lena, I will." She smiled again, her eyes curving with her cheeks rising. "Good! Tell me how it goes tomorrow." Then Lena acted like she almost forgot something. She dug around in her purse and pulled out a blue book. "Here, this is one of my favorite books. It's called 'Wonder' by RJ Palacio." You look down at the book in her hands and take it from her. Lena smiles once more and then leaves the store.

The rest of your day you thought about the advice Lena gave you. It wasn't right to assume something without having any tangible proof. You stared at your phone, wanting to text Tae but not knowing how to start. You decided to would do it tomorrow, you were off so it would be more appropriate. If you started in on this conversation now it would carry over late into the night.