Frozen Lake (KTH 18+)

Chapter 5 - Regrets

You had three days off in a row, you were thankful honestly. You focused on finishing all the unpacking. You got everything out and put away. Finally all the cookware, utensils, plates, bowls, cups, towels, and every toiletry you both had was put up. You broke down the cardboard boxes and set them by the door. You'd take them out later. 

Hye had been hammering you with questions as he noticed you were different all weekend. He kept saying he saw a sadness in your eyes, and it worried him. You didn't see it when you looked in the mirror but believed him. You did feel sad, and mostly stupid. After he kept mentioning it, you put on a happy face just for him. You still felt bummed but made a brave face for your big brother. You didn't want him to worry.

Finally, it was time to leave for work. You threw food into your lunchbox and it kind of saddened you. It reminded you of Taehyung and how he always wanted some of your food. You picked up the cardboard boxes and dumped them in the trash bin outside. You crawled into your car and drove off to work.

You greeted Mr. Jung when you arrived and started your normal routine. You organized each bookshelf and each magazine rack. You flattened out the corners on the magazines that curled up. You then started sweeping, the floor had gotten a little dirty while you were off for three days.

As you were dumping the broom pan into the trash, Mr. Jung approached you. "A young man came by yesterday looking for you. I told him you were off and would be here today." Your heart stopped. It had to have been Taehyung, you didn't know what other young man would come looking for you here. "Thank you," you mumbled, becoming nervous. If he knew you were going to be here today, then he would probably show up at some point. The thought made you anxious.

In no way, shape or form did you want to face Taehyung. You didn't want his pity; he would just feel sorry for you, and you didn't want that. The front door rang, and your head shot up. But it was that daily quiet girl coming in. She ran right back into the non-fiction per the usual. You sighed relieved seeing that it was just her.

Shortly she came up to the register with only a few books this time. You quietly scanned each book. "29.32" you told him flatly. She gave you the money but stared at you oddly. You took the money and placed it in the register. She stood there for a second, as if waiting for something. You looked at her and she gave you a tiny smile. "Have a good day," the girl said sweetly. His voice was high-pitched and sweet. You smiled to yourself as she left. You must have looked pretty pathetic for this girl to even be nice to you.

Another few hours passed, and your lunch time was approaching. You couldn't wait, you needed a break from here. The workflow wasn't hard but the fact that you freaked out every time someone came in or walked by was exhausting.

Soon your worse fears became a reality. You saw Taehyung walking towards the shop from across the street. He must have been at the park. You immediately picked up your lunchbox and ran towards Mr. Jung's office. "Mr. Jung I'm going to take my lunch," you stated urgently, but trying to not raise suspicion. He nodded and you ran towards the backdoor. You unlocked it and walked outside behind the store. There was a small parking lot behind the bookstore where you parked your car. You climbed inside and hid.

After anxiously scanning every direction for several minutes, you finally calmed down enough to eat your lunch. You ate in silence and by your lonesome. Your social media on your phone was your only friend for the moment. It felt quite pathetic, but fitting. You tossed away your only friend, you risked it all for some abrupt kiss that meant nothing. You were just caught up in the moment and was feeling vulnerable from Kaji hurting you.

Your half hour lunch break was up, you packed up your containers and shyly re-entered the building. You tried to sneak around until you knew the coast was clear. Once you saw that Taehyung wasn't here, you walked back up to the counter. Mr. Jung came up to you and you knew what he was going to say before he said it. 

"That young man was here again asking for you. I told him you just went on lunch and was probably in the park." You sighed, thankful for his misdirection. You always ate in the park, but not today. "Thank you," you said timidly, and Mr. Jung looked at you with confused eyes for a few long seconds before returning to his office.

The day was finally over, Taehyung had not come back, and you were thankful. You helped Mr. Jung close and then left as usual. You felt guilty of avoiding Taehyung, but you didn't know what to say if you saw him. You barely knew him; you didn't even know his full name or anything about him. Yet you attacked him with an unsolicited kiss. The boldest and stupidest thing you'd ever done.