I do, I did

5

Callie and Miranda got into the car. " So how is everything?" Callie asked.

" This is the worse thing that I have ever experienced in my life. My husband is married to someone else and has a child on the way and I'm just conveniently placed in the middle as a fucking best friend. It's a fucking joke" Miranda yelled.

"Oh my God Bailey, what are going to do." Callie asked with her eyes wide.

" I don't know, I think I'm going to have to let him go, I can't come in between him and a family. I understand why it happen. Yeah I'm still angry about it. I mean, I wanted him to drop that lady and divorce her the minute he found out about me, but that is so wrong." Miranda said but, in her heart she meant it, she wanted him to leave her. He was hers.

Miranda and Callie went shopping all day. She got new shoes, heels, suits, dresses, jeans, shirt, blouses, bra, and panties. She had so many bags in her hand.

"Okay I need to go get my hair done. Maybe I can do a walk in." Miranda stated.

"Are you going back to Lisa?" Callie asked.

"No, I can't just show up from the dead to my hair stylist. Too much to explain." Miranda laughed.

Miranda went and got her hair done. Her and Callie went to the make up store and got make up and their nails and feet done. Before heading to the bank to open up an account.

" Okay great. I think I did everything. Now all I need to do is go to the hospital and get some books to read up on surgeries." Miranda said while getting back into the car.

Miranda came back to the house and she saw Ben's car in the drive way. She put the code in the door and had some bags in her hand.

" Hey babe, wow you look absolutely stunning. You need help?” Ben asked.

" I'm not your babe and yeah help me grab some of these bags." Miranda said walking back out to Callie's car.

Ben and her took several trips until everything was inside. Miranda said her goodbyes to Callie and she walked back inside. She grabbed some of the bags and took them up stairs. Ben grabbed some and followed her. "Ooh I like these." Ben said going through the bag with her Bras and panties, holding the red ones.

Miranda and Ben both simultaneously thought back to their phone conversation before their wedding. She didn't want a mountain lodge Christmas wedding. She wanted a simple wedding but he had already put down the deposit.

"I'm the one who has to put on the poofy dress"

"Yes which will be magnificent by the way, but I like the view as much as my sister does. Come on Miranda. You—"

"You know what this conversation is over."

"I love you Miranda Bailey."

"I love you too." Miranda whined.

"Hey before we hang up. Tell me something sexy that will get me through the day. I've been thinking about sexing you all day. What color panties are you wearing?" Ben said with a deep raspy voice that made her knees go weak. Miranda smirked on the phone listening to him.

"Red panties and a lace bra." Miranda Informed as she cheesed.

Miranda shook her head and walked back down stairs to get the rest. After she was done she walked back down stairs in the kitchen. She looked in the freezer and saw shrimp, so she decided to make Alfredo.

"Aww baby you're making shrimp Alfredo." Ben said walking behind her and hugging her. Miranda shoved his hands off of her. " Yes and for the last time Benjamin Warren, stop calling me that." Miranda hissed walking over to the stove.

A month past, Miranda and Ben was still sleeping with each other. Almost every night, some nights they never even made it to the room. Ben had her bent over the counter and she used napkins to keep quiet. Other nights they sat and watched sifi movies and he helped her with surgery questions. As much as she disliked this situation, she slightly did feel bad for Simone because she didn't sign up for this and she doesn't know the full truth. This whole thing was messing with Miranda's conscience. Normally she would never sleep with a married man. But another side of her felt entitled to Ben. That side of her overshadowed her guilty conscience. The bigger question was, Who's marriage to him trumps the other?

Miranda was back at work. This brought her so much happiness, being able to be back in surgery. She was just trying to get everything in her life in order. She was able to get a car and now she was working on getting an apartment. She just needed two pay stubs to prove income. So next week, she would be able to leave.

Miranda was in the kitchen when the door bell rung and she wiped her hands on her apron walking to the door.

“Curt, oh my God.” Miranda exclaimed.

“Miranda. Oh my god it’s so good to see you.” Curt said pulling her into a hug.

“It’s good to see you too. Man it’s been so long.” Miranda sighed.

“come on in. I’m cooking lunch right now.” Miranda told him walking to the kitchen.

“dam is this how you cook? What the hell does Ben got going on.”

“Haha. Very funny. I was going swimming after lunch.” Miranda stated referring to her bathing suit.

Miranda and Curt laughed in the kitchen together and they looked to the entrance of the kitchen as Ben and Simone walked in holding hands. Miranda stared at their joined hands and she glared at Ben.

“So that’s where all the laughing is coming from.”

“Yeah me and Curt was just talking about back in the day.” Miranda explained.

“Yeah I told Miranda that I would go for a dip in the pool with her plus I came right on time and she’s making my favorite. Her honey garlic glazed Salmon over pan fried rice.”

“Oh I remember them days of the three of us, eating dinner together .” Ben commented with a smile.

“Yeah before you would kick me out so yall…oh never mind. It’s just good that Miranda’s back.” Curt cleared his throat.

Everyone ate lunch together and Miranda placed her feet on Ben’s leg rubbing up and down as she sat beside him. She loved messing with him. She moved her hand over his thigh and talked with Curt catching up.

Ben ate and tried to ignore the way Miranda’s foot and hand moved. She was very good at multitasking. Keeping a straight face while her hand did dangerous things, it was the surgeon in her. She laughed with Curt but was sliding her hand in his shorts and rubbing her hand across his hard-on that she caused. Ben bit his lip sighing internally.

After lunch Miranda stood and took everyone’s plate. She didn’t want anyone to see what she did to Ben.

“I need to walk this food off, Curt why don’t you take a walk me with.” Simone asked.

Curt looked at her confused. “Well you’re my husband’s brother and its not much that I know about you. I want us to bond and connect as well.” She explained.

“Oh of course.” Curt replied helping her stand.

“so does this mean I wasn’t invited.” Ben asked.

“That’s exactly what it means.” Simone replied laughing as her and Curt reached the door.

Ben stood and looked around for Miranda. She was playing with fire touching him and he wanted her.

Ben walked to the back door and saw Miranda sitting in the pool. He looked at her red bathing suit. He wanted to admire it earlier but he knew it was inappropriate.

Walking out back Ben shut the back door and Miranda looked up. “you started something.” Ben stated pointing to his penis.

Miranda looked down and licked his lips. “No one’s here for ad least 25 minutes. Think you can handle a quickie or you need more time?”

Ben bit his lip walking to the edge of the pool where he shredded his clothes. “all I need is 6 minutes.” Ben insisted.

“Come on then.” Miranda laughed splashing him with water.

Ben came into the pool and he swam over to Miranda. He pulled her into his arms and Miranda wrapped her legs around his waist, Ben reached his hands down rubbing across her body, gripping her ass.

Miranda’s nipples were hard against her wet bathing suit and brushing against Ben’s chest as they kissed. Ben reached behind her and pulled loose the strings of her one piece tied across her neck. He pulled the material down in the front revealing her perky breast.

“Benjamin.” Miranda moaned as he leaned down and sucked her nipple into his mouth. Miranda knew they were wasting time, she felt Ben’s penis already at her core. She just needed to slide her bathing suit to the side.

Ben then reached down quickly and shoved the material to the side and pushed into her immediately causing Miranda to moan out loudly as she gripped the back of his neck.

Both Miranda and Ben were moaning and panting as he stroked inside of her quickly, tapping against her gspot hard and consistently.

"Oh God yes Benjamin I'm so close." Miranda whimpered.

"Fuck." Ben groaned gripping her ass as he moved her on him. "Yes, right there. God don't stop." Miranda moaned.

Ben continued pulling her down and pushing her almost all the way off and on his penis and he was just like her, ready to come. Hearing Miranda moan, pant and call out his name was heaven.

“Benjamin I’m cumming.” Miranda shrieked and she laid her head into his neck, Ben kept moving soldiering through the way her pussy gripped him tightly until he burst, cumming quickly.

“ugggh dam.” Ben moaned and stilled, the waves and shocks flowing through his body.

“Why are we like this?” Miranda moaned unwrapping her legs from around his waist.

“because we are always in sync.”

Miranda scuffed pulling her bathing suit up and tying it. “and yet your married to another.” Miranda rolled her eyes getting out.

“Miranda.” Ben groaned.

“It’s nothing you can say Ben.” Miranda replied grabbing a towel.

“ but Miranda.

“If I had wanted a sister wife marriage I would have told you that upfront.” Miranda remarked walking inside of the house.

Days later, Callie set Miranda up on date with a Doctor from radiology. Miranda was reluctant to go and she told Callie how she felt about Ben but, Callie was right she shouldn't wait around to see what he was going to do. It wasn't fair to her. Miranda decided she would go, try to relax and have fun. It was better than being in the house with them on a Friday night.

Miranda took a shower and she lotion down. She put on a black half a push up bra and black panties. She stood in the mirror and curled her hair. After she was done she put them into pin curls until she was ready. Miranda put on make up, eye lashes and red lipstick. She went into her closet and pulled out an off the shoulder black bodycon dress. It was long sleeves and the sleeves were sheer. Miranda stepped into the dress and pulled it up on her body.

She walked over to the mirror and admired her self. It was sexy, she was sexy. She loved the way it showed her curves and her cleavage. It wasn't a huge amount but It was just enough, just the right amount. She grabbed her silver dangling earrings and the necklace to match. Miranda took her wedding ring off and put it into her red clutch. She grabbed her red platform heels and sat on the bed to put them on. They had strappy red bows that ties to the back. Miranda stood up and walked over to mirror to take the pin curls out. She had loose curls in her hair. She walked back to the mirror and looked over herself once again and she was satisfied.

She then grabbed her red clutch and put her essentials, phone and other stuff in there from out of her purse.

Miranda walked down stairs and she saw Ben and Simone in the kitchen. Simone was cooking and Ben sat at the counter with his laptop. They both turned around as they heard her heels click against the floor. " Wow you look really nice." Simone said.

"Oh thank you." Miranda said looking at her before cutting her eyes at Ben. Ben swept his eyes over her body a dozen times. He bit his lip as he stared. He better be glad Simone's back was turned to him because the way he was taking her in was ridiculous. Miranda thought

"Are you going somewhere special…if you don't mind me asking." Simone said smiling.

Miranda brushed some hair out of her face "oh yeah, I'm going on a date. A doctor I met. He works in radiology" Miranda enlighten smiling, putting her head down.

"What?" Ben gasped causing Miranda to snap her eyes at him.

" Oh, that's good for you. I hope you enjoy yourself." Simone chimed turning to look at Ben as well.

" You are not going." Ben asserted firmly.

" And why wouldn't I be going?” Miranda questioned snappy as she raised her eye brow.

" Yeah. Why can't she go Ben." Simone said with a confused look and she crossed her arms.

" Because. You just got out of a coma of 5 years. I just don't want anyone taking advantage of you. I'm just trying to look our for you." Ben lied. He was really fuming in the inside and he was trying his best to hide his anger.

" Well Mr. Benjamin Warren." Ben wanted to cut her off and remind her that she was Miranda Bailey-Warren but he couldn't. " I am perfectly capable of handling myself. I don't need you to look out for me. Do I look like the kind of women that needs protecting.”? Miranda questioned.

" No. I'm sorry I hope you enjoy yourself." Ben relented and Miranda picked up on the lie in his voice, she knew him inside and out and she knew when he was lying.

" Have a goodnight." Miranda said turning to walk to the door.

" I'll see you out." Ben said as he got up from the counter and walked behind her.

" Take this trash out while you are going." Simone said

Miranda walked in front of Ben out the door and Ben followed. He was starring at her shape. She looked so good. Ben thought "Miranda did you have to wear this or go out period?” Ben asked seriously.

" Yes, I thought this was sexy, flirty but still classy. You don't like it? " Miranda said curiously trying to act oblivious.

" I like it, I love it, I like it too much is the problem. This guy is a lucky baster to even see you in it, Miranda you are not going." Ben demanded frustrated

"I am going on a date and I'm going to have fun." Miranda said standing on the side of the house with him. Miranda could see the hurt, fear and anger in his eyes. He had his arms folded across his chest.

" Miranda." Ben whined sternly but pleading. He grabbed her by her waist and pulled her in and he rubbed his hands down her waist to her butt and he rested his hands there.

Miranda looked up into his eyes and then she looked away she didn't want to get distracted by him. Ben leaned in to kiss Miranda and Miranda turned her head away before his lips connected. She pulled away from him.

" Have a goodnight, Ben." Miranda said walking to her car and she put an extra sway in her walk.

Miranda had a good time on her date and honestly, she did like the guy. He was charming, a gentleman and all around funny. They ate and talked for over three hours before they danced on the dance floor. She enjoyed this night because it was stress free and just a night full of laughter.

When the night finally came to a close. Miranda looked at her phone and saw it was 1:30. "Carter I had a really good time tonight." Miranda said as he walked with her to her car.

" Me too Miranda. I hope it was enough to go out with me again." Carter said hopeful..

" Most definitely, give me a call Miranda said getting into her car as she smiled.

Ben was at home and Simone had already went to bed. Ben couldn't bring himself to sleep he was wondering what Miranda was doing. When she was coming back or if she was going to stay over with him. His mind was running in circles he couldn't concentrate on anything else. So, he sat on the couch and he had the Tv on but, he wasn't watching it. Ben felt his chest aching and heart racing, this was too much at once.

Ben saw the lights from her car flash through the window and he pulled himself together. He turned the TV off and waited for her to come in.

When Miranda came through the door. She took her heels off and put them in her hand.

" Did you enjoy yourself?" Ben asked through the darkness.

" I'm not about to play 21 questions with you. Goodnight Ben." Miranda said as she walked up the stairs.

Ben got up and followed behind her. Miranda walked into her room and shut the door before he got there. She went in the bathroom and stood in the mirror to wipe her makeup off. Ben opened the door up and stood behind her in the bathroom.

" Answer me. Miranda you must have had a good time because you left at 7:30 and now it's 2 am." Ben said. She could hear the anger in his voice.

"If it makes you feel any better yes I had a good time, a great time. He was very nice." Miranda said looking up at him through the mirror. She wouldn't tell him this but, him acting like this was turning her on more than he could imagine.

" No one. I mean no one will love you, how I love you Miranda Bailey-Warren." Ben huffed putting emphasis on her last name.

" Look at what we are doing now. Ben you are married to someone else. If this is what love is. I don't want it." Miranda said firmly.

" Miranda, you know I love you with everything I have in me." Ben said

" I can't tell. This isn't love. I need actions not words and all you are right now is a bag of words." Miranda said wiping her face.

Ben stepped closer behind her until he was breathing on her neck. This made her hand shake and the hairs on her body stand up. This didn't go unnoticed by Ben. Ben used his hand to caress her body and pulled her dress up until it was bunched up at her stomach.

Miranda shivered from the cold air and because she knew what was about to come. She already knew that no fore play was about to be involved. He was about to take her. Right here, right now. Hard, fast and rough. The first time Miranda ever had sex like that was with Ben. A long time ago right when they first got back together, after he found out about Eli. It was exhilarating to say the least.

Ben turned her around and kissed her. He lifted her up to sit on the bathroom counter. Ben snatched her panties down in one swift move. Miranda reached out and grabbed a bath cloth to put into her mouth because the sounds she was about to make would definitely wake up Simone and the neighbors.

Two days later, Miranda was on her way to work and she walked into the kitchen. She saw Ben hugging Simone from behind and she felt rage course through her veins.

She stood there and watched before she went into the cabinet to grabbed a glass. She dropped it on the floor shattering it on purpose. "Oops." Miranda said bending down to pick up the glass.

Simone backed away from Ben. She rolled her eyes and walked up stairs.

Miranda got up and walked over to Ben. " What the hell are you doing? You have been in my bed every single night" Miranda yelled/ whispered.

" Yeah, but she is my wife and she is pregnant." Ben said

" Don't start that wife shit with me Ben. I'm your wife. You haven't signed any divorce papers and you're not a widow." Miranda gritted

"look-

" No you look. Benjamin Warren. You think you can have your cake and eat it too. You better do something and do it fast." Miranda huffed throwing her hands up.

" I'm trying to figure this out." Ben said.

" I have already figured it out. Ben this is not how this was supposed to be. I'm your wife. I was supposed to bare your first child and all the rest to come. We were suppose to own a house. How do you think this shit makes me feel? How would you feel if you were in my shoes? Because I feel used. I'm uncomfortable here, I'm the visitor and my time is up. After tonight, this is my last night in y'alls house." Miranda said walking to the door.

"Mir- Ben started but the door slammed cutting him off.

Ben thought about what Miranda said at work. He knew that he couldn't keep doing this to her. Or Simone, he had to choose. He figured he could hold out until after the baby is born. He didn't want Simone to be sad and stressed during her pregnancy, especially him being the cause. He wanted his child to have safe and healthy delivery. But he knew he couldn't be with Simone, he belonged with Miranda. Simone didn't replace Miranda in his heart, she was irreplaceable.

He was settling for the next best thing and now the best thing was back. It was almost like loosing your name brand so you went and got the knock off. Yeah Simone made him smile and laugh. But Miranda was his smile, his laugh, his best friend and soul mate. If he lost her again, he would literally loose his self.

Miranda came back after work and she sat at the kitchen counter drinking wine. She just wished she could go back in time and rewind everything.

Simone came in and she sat her bags down. They weren't really cordial or acquaintances but they were polite to each other, for the most part. "Hello." Simone said.

"Hello." Miranda responded.

Simone grabbed her a small glass of red wine. "My husband doesn't love me anymore." She shared with a long face and defeated voice.

" Why would you say that?" Miranda asked. Ben obviously did love the girl because it was taking him so long to leave her.

"Because every night he sneaks out of our bed and disappear. " She stated slowly.

Miranda took a big gulp of her wine, she knew where this was going.

"At first I thought it was jitters because of the new baby but then again he never had that problem in the beginning." She continued.

" It occurred to me that ever since you set foot in this house, you have tried to steal my husband from me." She said slamming her hand down.

" Steal your husband from you?, Simone I'm sorry to break it to you. But that man is my husband." Miranda spat looking at her in the eyes standing up from the counter.

" Well, that's funny he never talked about you. You couldn't have been that much of a wife to him. How could You? Oh that's right, he left you to die in a hospital, didn't he?" Simone sneered with a smirk getting up from the counter and turning her back to walk away.

Miranda snatched her arm and spun her back around to face her. " You don't know shit about me and Ben." Miranda yelled.

"You thought I didn't know that you weren't just his best friend. I knew everything about Ben before I married him." Simone said flashing her ring.

"Then you should have known that it was over between you two when he found out about me." Miranda argued.

" Well I figured you couldn't be shit to him ,if he would cut your life support off. You were dead to him for two years." Simone argued.

"Well sweetheart, I'm not so dead to him now. Seeing how he is in my bed every night, wrapped up between my legs. He wants me. He loves me." Miranda scolded as she smirked.

Simone walked up to Miranda and slapped her across her face. Miranda used her back hand to slap her back. Miranda's wedding ring scratched her cheek, cutting it.

" Hey honey I'm home." Ben said as he came through the door.

Ben rushed over to them to split them apart. " Don't touch me." Simone yelled and snatched her hand away from Ben's as she held her face.

"What's going on?" Ben yelled

" What's going on is. This bitch is-" Miranda rushed forward to Simone. But Ben caught her and lifted her up, stopping her from attacking her.

" Bitch? I got your bitch." Miranda yelled and struggle against Ben.

Miranda then shoved him off of her and rushed past him outside walking to her car. She pulled out the boxes she had and brought them back in, about to go up stairs.

"What are you doing?" Ben asked.

" Packing. I'm getting the hell out of here." Miranda told him.

Ben rushed to her. " You are not going anywhere." Ben declared grabbing her arm.

" Yes, she is." Simone cut in.

" Tell her Ben; Tell her that you love me and you want to be with me. I'm your wife." Miranda yelled

" Look let us all just come down." Ben said.

" Tell her to leave our house Ben. She has came into our lives and turned it upside down and if you love me and your child. You would ask her to leave. " Simone yelled as tears slid down her face.

"And if you love me Benjamin Warren. You would leave with me. " Miranda quipped.

There was a cold silence that came over the room for a long while.

" You know what, you are such a coward. You are just like any other man. You can't own up to shit. I hope you really are happy with the decision that you have made. " Miranda said as tears came into her eyes.

Miranda dropped the boxes and turned to leave.

" Miranda." Ben said starring at her.

" You don't get it, do you? You would have been better off pulling the plug yourself." Miranda cried

" I'm sorry." Ben voiced, his eyes pricking with tears.

"There is no sorry." Miranda stressed taking her ring off and throwing it at his feet, before leaving out of the front door.

Miranda left and she went back to the hospital. She went into an on call room and she got into one of the beds. Ben was blowing her phone up, so she cut the ringer off and she closed her eyes and went to sleep.

"Hey Bailey, I didn't know you were on call tonight." Callie said as Arizona walked in behind her.

" If y'all were coming to have sex, use another one. "Miranda said, her voice shaky as she turned to look at them.

Arizona looked into her eyes and saw that they were red and puffy. " Oh my God Miranda what happened?." Both Callie and Arizona said at the same time as they walked closer.

"He basically chose her over me. His other wife was right, he left me to die." Miranda said and then burst into a fit of laughter. She had tears screaming down her face but she couldn't contain her laugh.

" What's funny? " Arizona laughed.

" My husband, her husband. He left me to die and married someone else." She continued laughing holding her chest.

" I woke up. Came back from the dead. A zombie." Miranda laughed and stood up walking like a zombie. "Whew this is good. He left me because he thought I was a corpse. Whew and now I'm like the bride who haunts him. He lost me and now I lost him" Miranda laughed.

Callie and Arizona laughed with her. Miranda laughed and then she burst into tears.

" What the matter?" Callie asked.

" I lost him." Miranda cried as Callie's brought her in for a hug.

" No you didn't, he loves you. He will come to his senses." Arizona said.

"That's the thing he shouldn't have to come to his senses. If he loved me. it shouldn't have been anything to decide he. Left me." Miranda cried.

" This is my fault. Me and Derek told him to let you go. He wasn't going to cut your machine off until we ask him to and he even resisted then" Callie huffed as she patted her back. Miranda stayed silent.

"I'm just going to go back to sleep. I am very tired." Miranda said walking back over to bed.

"We are on call tonight but if you want to, you can stay in our guest room. Tonight and However long you need."

"Thank you that would be great." Miranda said.

" I'm going to go get my house keys for you. I will be back."

Miranda drove to Callie and Arizona's house. When she got inside she went and look for some wine or Bourbon. Her failed marriage was turning her into an alcoholic. After she drunk a glass she went into the guest room and laid down. All she wanted was sleep.