Future Rewritten

Nightmare or Memories?

After getting back to the cottage, Nicole was done. She had been up extremely early to make all of those goodies and she was tired. So, she brings in the leftovers, places them in the kitchen to be taken care of tomorrow and got ready for bed. Which was fine with Ronin, he needed some alone time.

After an hour or two, Nicole was passed out in his bed. Sitting on the couch, he didn't have any lights on, just the glow of the fireplace. The week she had been here, she'd known who he was. Who everyone here was, and she didn't flinch away or run. Yet, she lied. If she could lie about this, how much was she really telling.

Ronin rubbed over his head, down his face, and back to the base of his skull. He didn't know what to think. It seemed nice to think someone like Nicole found safety in his presences, but how can he trust that this girl will be different. Different than the last outsiders he talked to and trusted, so very long ago.

A scream coming from his bedroom brought him out of his internal debate. Rushing as fast as he could, he went to see if someone had climbed into the window. What he saw was something he didn't expect. Nicole clutching her pillow, screaming in her sleep.

Ronin rushed to her side and tried to wake her. "Nicole... Nicole... Wake up."

Nicole violently woke up. Looking around, she tried to reestablish her surroundings. Once her eyes locked on to Ronin's, she began to cry. Leaping in his arms, she latched onto his wifebeater and refused to let go. Ronin place his hands on her hips.

"I'm so sorry... I'm so sorry!" Nicole cried into Ronin's chest. "I shouldn't have... please don't punish me..."

"It was just a nightmare. You're okay." Ronin clumsily patting Nicole's back for comfort.

"It's not just a nightmare, it's a memory. Memory of my life. The life I've been running from. The same life that's following me everywhere..." Nicole tried to move closer into Ronin's embrace.

"There's nothing to worry about here..." Ronin tried to push her away, but she wasn't relenting.

"NO! Don't... I'm afraid all the time." Nicole finally lifted her head to look at Ronin.

She was still crying, and Ronin didn't know what to say. "Afraid of what?"

Nicole frown and began crying again. "Afraid of him. Afraid that he's trying to find me or that he will. Afraid he'll get a hold of me and bring me back to that basement he had me chained in. I don't want to live the rest of my life on that cold cement ground, chained, with my body available to every guy's perversion who walks in that door with enough money."

Ronin couldn't believe what she was saying. "Nicole... I didn't know."

"I tried. I wanted to believe that, that part of my life was over with. That I could move on, but I never will. I lied to you, thinking that if I proved I could keep your secret, then I wouldn't have to leave here. I want a place I could be safe. Safe from him, but I lied to you." Nicole leaned back into Ronin's chest. "If I leave here then he'll lock me back up again."

"Nicole..." Ronin started to understand.

"It's mine. This body is mine. I should get a say who touches it and who doesn't." Nicole looked back up at Ronin. "I know that no man will ever want such damage goods, but I'd like to have control over my body and my mind again."

"We all have damages and a past we try to overcome." Ronin tried to reason. "We all want someone to love us regardless."

Nicole laughs a little. "Your damages remind me of Kintsugi."

"Kin...sue...gee?" Ronin looked confused.

Nicole shook her head. "Kintsugi. It's the ancient art of attaching broken piece of pottery with gold dust and resin. Symbolizing that object become more beautiful and unique the more time passes. Your scars are too beautiful to be considered anything other than gold."

"No one has ever called me artwork." Ronin felt something deep down from her words. "You are..."

"No... I'm not." Nicole interrupted. "I know you want to say I am as well, but I'm not. I'm a paper plate. Used and reused, over and over again. I have rips and tears and stains, but for some god-awful reason they keep me around. Continuing to use me until I break. Then I'll be disposed of."

"You really believe that?" Ronin felt horrible for the tiny woman in his arms.

"What else am I supposed to think? No one has ever wanted me, needed me, or missed me. No one has ever been happy to see me or claimed that their life is better with me in it. My only family sold me to settle a debt after he got tired of using me." Nicole choked back a sob. "I feel as if I'm waiting for the next man to step up and use me. Since that's the only thing I'm good at."

Ronin pulled Nicole in close and wrapped his arms around her. "You need to stop that. That's the evil men from your past talking. You have so much more to offer the world, and you have the rest of your life to learn new things too. Just, please don't say those things anymore."

"Can you sleep with me?" Nicole asked into his chest.

"WHAT!?" Ronin pulled Nicole back so he could look into her eyes.

"Can you sleep with me?" Nicole asked again. "I feel safer in your arms, and I want the nightmares to go away."

"Sleep...as in..." Ronin felt awkward.

"To go to bed..." Nicole crawled out of Ronin's arms and back under the sheets. "I just would like for you hold me. That's all, I promise."

Ronin nodded and followed Nicole under the sheets. She scooted her back against his chest, then laid her head on his arm. His body coiled, slightly, around her and he placed his free hand back on her waist. He rested his head against the top of her head. Even from the back, he could feel her heartbeat.

"Ronin..." Nicole whispered to the wall in front of her.

"Yes..." Ronin spoke into her hair.

"You called me Nicole..." Nicole smiled into Ronin's arm.

He could feel her smile. "Yeah... Figured it was time."

"Good night." Nicole snuggled into Ronin's warm chest.

"Good night... Nicole." Ronin breathed in her scent before drifting off to sleep.