Forever and Always (R5)

10) Judgments

I read the text for the hundreth time. I was going to hang out with Ross Lynch. I stare at myself in the crappy hotel mirror, it was covered in dirt and mold unknown how it grown. My brown hair was messy so I decided to put it in a bun but it makes my head look big. I pouted my lips swaying my head side to side for different angles. I sigh and coutinue swaying if it might change something but it didn't. I don't know why I'm putting so much effort in, it's just him. Just Ross Lynch, a normal guy. Some part of me is almost as excited as I was to met him, the other part felt like it was seeing a friend. I adjust the bun the last time and let out a sigh to myself. I reapply my lips with lip balm and drag the mascara brush through my lashes one last time. I stare again at myself, praying in my head that this will go down well. Something happened yesterday, he just seems different to me and it kills me that I can't put my finger on what. I shove one of the hotel towels, dry clothes, my phone and sunscreen all in my bag. I don't think the hotel would mind me borrowing one of their towels because I didn't bring one with me. I just have to make sure I don't lose it or anything. I tighten my laces of my old, beat up, navy, converse, my only shoes I own. I haul the stuffed bag over my shoulder, smiling to myself as I walk out of the room into the living room. There was no dout in my mind that I wasn't myself. I just don't know what's wrong with me yet, I feel different today. They were already there waiting for me, looking bored and annoyed of course. I saw my mom roll her eyes in the back of my head as I strutted past them to the door.

"You took long enough" my father gretted me grumbled to himself like usual. His comment caused my mother and him to snicker in judgment but I had other things to worry about. Things like if this is going to go okay. I hop into the back seat, placing my bag down in front of me on the ground. I stare out of the window hoping the drive doesn't take long because I can't wait to get away from them. And to see Ross too of course.

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As the car pulled up to the driveway, I openned my eyes from my nap. The drive felt even longer today for some reason. As soon as the car stopped I got out quickly, hauling my bag over my shoulder once again. I walk up to the front door but before I ring the door bell I turn around and fakly smile to my family. They ingore me and countinue to pull out of the driveway but I didn't care. I reach up and bounce my finger on the button creating the same sound of chimes in the inside. I heard running and then a sound of the lock turning. The door openned to Riker. He looked at me puzzled.

"Is Ross here?" I ask knowing the answer already.

"Yeah, I'll just go get him and by the way I'm sorry about the video" he says backing away from the door awkwardly pointing both of his hands to his right. I nod and smile at his awkardness. I couninue to stand there, staring at my shoes which have gone through some rough times with me. There was the time I was pushed into mud, that time I fell into cow poo, the time I ran away, the time my parents through them in the bin, the time some girl decided it would be a good idea to use them to frame me for some prank and put them in a bag of flour and many more insidents. I always wash them though so don't think there's cow poo on my shoes because there isn't. I look up to see Ross coming towards me, wearing his famous cheeky smile that girls spoon over however I do see why.

"Let's go" he says still smiling, walking past me and towards the car. He looks back at me once his hand is on the car door handle. I smile at him and walk towards the car myself. I open the door and climb inside, closing the door once I was in. I placed my bag on the ground in front of me and looked over at Ross while clicking in my seat belt. He turns the car on but before he drives out he reachs for the sterio. He pushes a button and music stars pouring out of the speakers instantly changing the mood of the car. The song was unreconasable to myself. It was pop but not something I would listen too. I watch him carefully as he looks behind him, while driving out of the driveway. He humms along to the song while im praying in my head that the song will be over soon. Because it was not music at all, it was just rapping about random things. My prays were answered by the station finally changing it after what felt like a century. As the notes first play, I knew what song it was. One of my current favorites. I myself begin to hum along with the notes, Ross surprisingly did the same. As the first line was sung, I sung along too.

"Oh so, you'll be crying, Your dad will bother looking into it" I sung along, not caring about my voice.

"I probably won't left to my own devices, but that's the difference not opinions" Ross sung. I stare at him puzzled. He sings up beat pop, how the hell did he just sing that perfectly? He couninues to sing the rest of the song while I stare at him confused. But as the chorus came I had no control.

"Talk is cheap my darling when you're feeling right at home" I sung loudly with Ross, dancing a little to the beat. "I want to make you move with confidence, I wanna be with you alone" we both countinued to sing loudly; he was singing, I was failing to sing and dancing. As the song finished I couldn't help but laugh.

"Why are you laughing for?" he asks laughing himself turning the wheel, keeping his eyes on the road.

"Because" I shrugg still laughing.

"You seem much more relaxed, I saw you dancing even." he laughs turning down the new song that was playing.

"I guess I am" I smile staring out the window tryng to work out where we were.

"I knew you'd come around" he laughs. His words hurt me though. He said them like he knew me, like he understood me but he didn't, nobody did.

"You don't know me" I simply say accidently coming offf cold. He quickly galences at me, looking puzzled making me feel gulity inside. I bit my lip hoping there's still a chance to have a good time.