Make Me (Remdy)

We're All A Little Soft

Trigger Warnings: Mentions of death, PTSD, depression

Remington looks at the open car door and then at Andy, who's waiting with patience for him to get in. Then he shakes his head. 

"You need to get in," Andy says calmly. "You have to go to therapy." 

"I can't," Remington weakly admits. "I just-I can't. All the shit with Leo...I can't." 

"Listen, I understand, but you need to go to therapy, hon. You know you do." 

"Not in the car." 

"You can't walk, it's way too far." 

Remington is close to tears. They both know it. "I can't," he repeats. "Andy, I can't. I'll have a panic attack, or I'll be sick, or something bad will happen and we'll both die. I can't." 

"Nothing's going to happen," Andy tries in a soothing voice. 

"It happened once, it'll happen again." 

"Honey, look. I get it, I do. I'm sorry there isn't an easier way. But if you miss therapy today, you'll start missing it more often, and that can't happen. You know you need to keep talking to her." 

Shaking his head once more, the younger turns away from the car. "It's just this one time. I'll be fine next time, I will." 

"Will you?"

"I don't know." 

"Look, I'll drive really slow and we can pull over if you need to." 

"No, I can't." 

Andy sighs. 

"You don't understand. I was just starting to, like, get my shit together, y'know. Starting to accept that they're gone, and now...Leo just, he brought it all back. The threats to run me over. To run you over. It's too real. I know if I get in the car, I'll have hallucinations like I used to, and then I'll be sick and everything will go wrong. Nothing else can go wrong, Andy, please. Nothing else can go wrong, I couldn't deal with that." 

"Okay. What do you want to do instead? You wanna see if she'll call you or something?" 

"Okay." 

Andy puts a hand between his shoulder blades. He can feel how uneasy he is. "It's alright," he says. "It's alright. We'll work on it. I don't want to put you through anything horrible like that, okay, you know I don't. I just want you to get the help you deserve, that's all." 

"I know." 

"Come on, hon, come inside. Do you have her number?"

"Yeah, I'll call her." 

They walk back to the front door together, Andy letting Remington in first and saying, "You're doing great, babe. I mean it." 

Remington turns to look at him. Without speaking, he wraps his arms around the man. 

"You're gonna get through this, I know you are. Hey, don't cry, don't cry. It's okay. I got you. Shh." 

"You just really are important to me," Remington mumbles through tears. "Really, I need you so much. Thank you for being here." 

"Oh, hon, of course. Of course. You're important to me, too. Here, c'mon, look at me." He holds Remington at arms length and smiles. "My gorgeous little darling, I will always be here. Now go call Angelica, there's a good boy." 

Remington wipes his eyes. "I like it when you're all soft," he says. "Okay, I'm going." 

Once he goes upstairs to call Angelica, Remington doesn't return, so Andy assumes she agreed to talk over the phone. He sits and works on some new lyrics until his phone rings and surprisingly, it's Juliet. "Hey," he answers. 

"Andy, hey. It's Juliet." 

"I know." 

"Oh, right. Listen, I know this is a little sudden, but I was supposed to meet my manager twenty minutes ago and have no one to look after Lucas, you wouldn't happen to be free to do it until I get back, would you?" 

Andy is quiet for a few moments before he answers. "If you bring him over, sure. I can look after him. But listen, Remington's staying with me. That's not an issue, is it?" 

"Remington? The guitarist? No, he's fine. As long as he's nice. I assume he's nice." 

"He's perfect." 

"High praise," she teases. Andy isn't sure she's spoken to him like this for years. 

He chuckles. "Yes, very. Honestly, he's perfect, though." 

"Biersack, are you crushing on your band mate?" 

"Crushing? Sure. You bringing Lucas over now?" 

"Yeah, just collecting a few things you might need. You got that chocolate milkshake still?" 

"Of course." 

"Good. I'll be there soon. Thanks so much." 

"Sure, no worries. Thanks for trusting me with him. See you." 

* * * 

The doorbell rings fifteen minutes later. Andy opens it to a grateful looking Juliet and a curious looking Lucas, who's face breaks into a grin when he recognises the man. "Everything you need is in here," she tells him, handing over a bag. "A few of his toys and a change of clothes in case. Have fun." She turns her attention to the little boy beside her. "Be good for Andy," She says. "In you go." 

Lucas happily leaves her side and holds his arms up for Andy, who picks him up with ease and holds him with one arm. "Have fun with your manager. You know what time you'll be back?" 

"Honestly it might be quite late. There's sleeping things in the bag, you have a spare room, right? Unless Remington's using it?" 

"No, he's in my bed. If you'd rather come by in the morning, I'll give him breakfast and everything." 

"Really? Oh, Andy, you're a lifesaver. Have fun with Andy, sweetheart. See you tomorrow." 

"Bye mummy." 

Andy smiles at his voice. "See you tomorrow," He says. "Any trouble, I'll call, okay?" 

"Yes, great. Thanks again. Bye bye Lukie." Blowing him a kiss, she turns and begins back towards her car. 

Andy closes the door and takes his son through to the living room.