Make Me (Remdy)

We All Have Traditions

Trigger warnings: Mention of depression, death

In the evening, Andy walks with Remington to the graveyard and the two sit side by side on his jacket, nonspeaking. Remington leans against Andy's shoulder and looks at the graves with teary eyes, eventually saying, "One Christmas, when we were kids, Sebastian dared me to climb up the tree. I did and I wouldn't recommend." 

Andy puts his hand over Remington's. 

"It fell on me. They laughed for hours about it. Mum made me sit in my room for an hour and I cried like the world was ending. I hated Sebastian for it for weeks after." He sighs. "That was before mum and us fell out. I haven't spoken to her in years." 

"That's awful." 

"We wanted to drop out of school for our band. Sebastian told her how many famous musicians had done it, but she refused. It got heated, we yelled, she yelled back, and then Sebastian got his own place and we moved in with him. I don't even think she knows they're gone now." 

"I'm so sorry, that sounds horrible." 

"Maybe it's why I'm so fucked. I don't know. I always regretted not making up with her. I mean, she's my mum. I don't want to not know her." Another sigh. "And when they died and I didn't have her to mourn with, it really fucking sucked. I thought about contacting her at first. You know, 'Hey mum, sorry to bother you but two of your sons are dead.' I never did. I didn't think she'd want to know." 

"Of course she'd want to know, she's your mother." 

"Yeah, but...She didn't support us when we needed it and she wasn't there for me when I needed her. She never bothered to check in on us after we left. I mean, we were teenagers, Andy. Emerson was fourteen. She should have cared." 

"Maybe she was worried you'd hate her for it." 

"Maybe." Remington shrugs. "I just wish I still had her as my mum, you know? Seeing you getting on so well with Lucas, it kinda brought all this back." 

"I get it. I'm sorry things went so wrong." 

"Yeah, me too. You're shivering." 

"It's fucking freezing." 

"You did take your coat off." 

"So you could sit down." 

"Because you're the best," Remington concludes. "Okay, let's go home." 

"You don't wanna wish them a happy Christmas?" 

"No, I..." He shakes his head. "Well, I never did when they were alive. Gotta keep up traditions." 

"I see, I see. Respect. Alright, come on. Get up." 

"Yes sir," Remington mocks. "Thanks for coming with me."

"Of course." 

"Juliet totally loves me." 

Beginning down the path with Remington by his side, Andy hums. "I'm sure she does, you're very lovable." 

"I know, right?"

"And modest, too." 

Remington smiles and shoves his hands in his pockets. "Thanks for today," he says. "I was dreading it for weeks. Thanks for making it bearable." 

Andy links their arms and pulls Remington towards him. "I'm glad it was okay." 

"Okay. I never said it was okay. I said it was bearable. Almost not bearable, but bearable." 

"Well, nevertheless, I'm glad you spent it with us." 

"I felt like I was dragging you all down." 

"Are you kidding? Hon, Lucas adores you, Juliet keeps saying you're the best decision I ever made, and I just fucking love you." 

"Stop being soppy." 

"Aw, why?" 

"Because it makes me feel like a bad boyfriend." 

Andy laughs. "A bad boyfriend? You're the one who made me realise that I wanted a boyfriend. You're the best boyfriend." He takes his phone from his pocket. "Oh, it's Juliet. 'Hey loser.'  Strong start. 'Hey loser. Where's your Batman collection?.' As if she doesn't know already." He types a response, stops a few paces back from the road like Remington always does, waits for the lights to change. 

"Loser," Remington mocks. "I don't think you're a loser." 

"That's very nice of you." 

"I think you're a cunt." 

Andy shakes his head. "Of course you do." The cars come to a halt and they cross the road, Remington walking close to Andy, and quickly. "Breathe," Andy whispers once they're back on safe pavements. 

"You breathe," Remington retorts, then smiles.

Back at the house, Juliet is showing Lucas the collection of figures Andy has collected over the years, reminding him to be careful because some of them are rare. "Daddy!" He exclaims when he notices the man, turning away from the collection and lifting his arms up.

Andy picks him up and spins him around. "Hello, little Batman. What're you up to?" 

"Batman!"

Andy laughs. "You, my little man, have been raised right." 

* * * 

Late evening. Remington is sat in bed flipping through a book absently and Andy is working on lyrics, humming quietly to himself, stopping when the younger says, "That sounds awesome." 

Andy leans in to read the words in the book. "That sounds boring." 

"It is boring." 

Putting his hand on the pages and pushing the book down into Remington's lap, the elder says, "Wanna have sex?" 

Remington clears his throat and then smiles. 

"Is that a yes, or..." 

"Obviously, cunt." 

"You've called me that so many times, I'm starting to like it."