GHOST OF YOU

thirteen

Akeisha Karalyne,

To start, I think your name sounds so angelic. You look angelic as well, it matches you. I admit, you first caught my attention because you looked like Akane-san. Ah, I could still remember the first night we met. Your smile light up my whole world that I didn't even know felt so dim until you walked right to me.

I tried brushing you off my mind, I would distract myself from thoughts of you by drowning myself in works. Hell, I even put up with Sanzu's loud mouth because for real, he is good at distracting me. Too good that I wanna throw him out the building sometimes.

Speaking of that junkie, it's funny how he became a reason for us to cross roads again. I wouldn't really notice you if you didn't spill your drink on him, but to be honest, I'm glad you did that cause he deserves it.

Fate is a bitch, I really wanted to separate myself from you but it kept pulling us together. Say, Aki, do you believe in red string of fate? Where there is an invisible red string connecting people together, pulling them back to each other when they lost their ways? I don't at first, but seeing how I always run back to your arms after every pull, maybe there really is an invisible string between us.

I can't get enough of your smiles, your laugh that surrounds the room over stupid jokes I came up with, your glossy eyes whenever we watch your romantic movies, the way you gently snore as you sleep on my chest.

Akeisha Karalyne, you're a perfect being. Fuck, you're beyond perfect, my love. And I hate myself for being undeserving of you. I hate myself for seeing someone in you when you deserved someone who won't see a glimpse of their past when they stare at your beautiful eyes.

Say, what if we met in a different circumstance? A different timeline? A world where you and me is not another impossible what if? Ah, I would love that. I would.

"Koko," Sanzu called me while he's driving, "how do you feel about her now?"

I looked outside the car's window as we head to the hideout of the bastards who took you and your cousin. How do I feel about you?

I love you. Yes, you, Akeisha Karalyne Sato.

No, I always knew I loved you. It wasn't hard to tell, it isn't hard to love you after all. I was denial, I was stupid.

Are we too late? Please, let's escape this together. Will you still go back to France? I'll come with you. Hell, I'll follow you wherever you go. So please, don't leave me in this world alone.

I don't wanna be alone anymore, my angel.

I ran to the second floor of the building I'm in and I am very much aware that I may not come out here alive, or whole, I don't know but you're worth laying my life down for.

I will throw myself to protect you.

You wanted me leave you because you know it's hopeless, but I don't want to. I'll go down with you, I don't care. What's the point of living if I'm not with you. Bonten can handle themselves, I want to choose you this time.

Say Akeisha, if we won't survive here, can you promise me that we'll find each other again in another time? In a time where it's you and me, a time where I get to see your smile without worrying about how imperfect I am.

Because I want you. Shit, I badly want you.

"Hajime?" I opened my eyes and here you are, in front of me, smiling so brightly, "it's time to go now."

You held out your hand in front of me, and I didn't hesitate taking it. I don't know where we are headed to, but as long as it's with you, I'm good.

You smiled at me, "we're going home, Hajime."

I chuckled, "even if we're hell bound, as long as it's with you, I'm already home."

You laughed at that, "don't worry, I'll find you again in another life."

Yes, yes please. Let's find each other again in another life, my angel. I will correct the mistakes I never get to correct before leaving this world, but it's fine at least I get to follow you in the afterlife.

I never told you these things, but please know all these are true.

I love you, Akeisha Karalyne. In this lifetime and in the next, I'll always do.

Yours always,
Kokonoi Hajime