Requested by: @kkamiya
"can you please do a jayhoon au where sunghoon struggles to come out to jay as trans (ftm) but jay actually supports him all the way and there's a comfort scene where they cuddle and/or jay helps sunghoon put on his binder?"
Double update WOOHOO!
I know it's short, but it was so heartwarming to write, especially since I'm still not out yet and my family's a bunch of homophobes (on New Year's Eve, my dad criticized Lil Nas X cuz he was black and gay) my sister knows because the condescending bitch snooped on my messages where I came out to my best friend and blackmailed me to confirming it by threatening to call our parents (and she wonders why I hate her) and I've been paranoid that she'd out me ever since
"Jay. I'm actually trans." Sunghoon says in the mirror as he brushes his teeth, voice coming out muffled. As far as he knew, Jay thought Sunghoon was just a boy. Not that he was actually born trans. Luckily, he and Jay don't live together (yet) so he doesn't have to hide his binders and other stuff. He had a panic attack when he was buying menstruation pads one time and Jay just happened to be there. He awkwardly lied that his little sister got her first period (it wasn't a lie, she did but the untruthful part was that it was a month before) and luckily Jay believed him.
That didn't mean if something like that happens again Sunghoon would get lucky again.
"Jay." He repeats. "You know about trans people, right? Well, of course you know. Cool. Cool. I'm actually one of them...?"
Why is coming out so fucking hard?
He spit out his toothpaste and rinsed out his mouth in the sink, rinsing out his toothbrush as well before putting it back in it's designated cup, sighing as he looked in the mirror again.
Are those eyebags?
God, how worried was he?
As hard as coming out was, it was even harder lying to Jay forever. They were a couple, and as his boyfriend Jay had every right to know his secrets. And it was better if it was gonna be out of his mouth, not someone else's. Plus, they recently moved in together and how the hell was he gonna hide his binder?
He exits the bathroom, finding Jay in the kitchen and making them breakfast. Sunghoon walked up to him, noticing that the older was cooking an American-style breakfast of eggs, bacon and pancakes.
Jay sensed his presence. "Morning, doll."
"Morning, Jongseongie."
Jay looked at him, his eyebrows furrowed in concern. "Did you sleep okay? You look tired."
Sunghoon suddenly remembered his little dilemma. "Oh... Can I talk to you? After breakfast?"
"Okay." Jay says, kissing the younger's hand.
Sunghoon sits on the kitchen island nearby, worrying filling up his head. What if Jay hates me? What if he breaks up with me? What if—
"Baby doll, what's going on in that pretty mind of yours?" Jay asked, handing the younger his breakfast.
"You'll still love me... right? No matter what?" Sunghoon asked, his sad puppy-dog eyes on display.
"Of course, Hoon." Jay says immediately without a single trace of hesitation in his voice.
"Okay... I'm... I'm... I'm trans..." Sunghoon managed out, pulling the collar of his shirt and revealing his binder.
"Trans?" Sunghoon just nodded, head down out of shame.
Sunghoon gasped when he was pulled into an embrace and felt a kiss on his head. He looked at Jay, who had nothing but a loving look on his face. Sunghoon's eyes get teary. "Jay... You're not disgusted?"
"So what if you're trans? Your gender doesn't change the fact that you're the love of my life."
Sunghoon feels like bawling. "Jongseong..."
"I love you." Jay says fondly, wiping a tear on Sunghoon's cheek.
Sunghoon smiles, hugging the older. "I-I love you too."
----
"Jongseongie!" Sunghoon called. Jay, being the best boyfriend ever, arrives in 3 seconds. "What? What's wrong?"
"I n-need help with my b-binder." Sunghoon says, awkwardly smiling. He was stuck in a position where his arms were in the wrong holes.
Jay smiles as he gently takes the binder off and puts it back on the younger again, this time in the correct position.
"There we go," Jay says, kissing the younger's forehead. "You look pretty."
"T-Thanks." Sunghoon says, putting a sweater on. Jay smiled at the younger's cuteness.
I want to be out so bad but then my parents remind why I'm still in the closet sad 😭
