Chasing in the dark

CHAPTER 12

The sun is shining through my bedroom window. Wow, I wonder how long I've been asleep.

I get up and walk to the window to close the curtain. There's a note on my windowsill. What is this? I open it up and it's a note from Jun-won "thanks for the ice cream, see you after school."

That's weird. I remember the ice cream fell on the ground when that ... the realization of last night slaps me across the face like a cold winter's night. I shake the thought out of my mind and make my way to the bathroom.

I look at myself in the mirror. I am not gonna go to school today, I think to myself. My eyes are puffy and red. If I show up at school looking like this, So-hee might just have a million questions and I do not have the energy to tell her about what happened last night.

I open the faucet and let the water run into the basin. I splash some cold water on my face. I have to forget about last night. I can feel the knot in my throat coming back as I relive that scene in my mind.

I can still smell the stench of the alley. The cigarette breath on my face. The rough hands pulling at my pants and the sharp pinch of the knife to my throat. I shake the thought from my mind as I wipe at the tears threatening to make it's way down my face.

No! No more crying Dae-Seong! I open the shower and let the water run. I remove my clothes and step into the shower. I keep repeating to myself that I'm fine and that if it wasn't for gangster guy... Jae-A. His name is Jae-A.

I let out the breath I didn't know I was holding. I should thank him. Last night could've been way worse if he didn't show up.

~

I make my way to the kitchen and find my mom and dad sitting at the kitchen table. It's one of those rare days where my dad isn't drunk out of his mind. They're silent though.

My mom sees me and stands up. She removes my food from the microwave and puts it on the table. I smile at her and sit down. My dad looks at me "Where were you last night?" He asks me with a stern tone in his voice.

I clear my throat as I answer him "I uh... went to visit a friend and lost track of time... sorry"

My mom and dad look at each other again. They're having that eye conversation with each other, you know, the one married couples have.

"You left your brother alone the whole night because you went to "visit a friend"? Who is this friend?"

I stuff my face with the porridge my mom prepared for me "I'm talking to you!" My dad sounds angry now. Since when does he care about anyone other then himself?

"It's not gonna happen again." I get up without finishing my food. I really do not care for this false concern my dad is showing right now. I put my bowl in the kitchen sink and kiss my mom on the cheek.

"I'm going out." As I walk past my dad, he pulls me back "Where do you think you're going?" I freeze for a moment as I think back to last night. I cannot stop myself from shivering.

I can see the concern on my mom's face as she sees the emotions playing out on my face. I smile but it doesn't reach my eyes "I'm going to school. My recital is around the corner and I need the practice. I won't be back late." With that, I leave the house.

I walk to the front gate. I pause for  moment, gathering my emotions. I slowly breath in and out "It's okay. You can do this" I open the gate and step outside. The street is empty. I have this weird feeling.

I look left and then right. There's no one in the street. It's empty. Too empty if you ask me. What if he is waiting for me around the corner again. I feel my legs trying to give way underneath my body. Pull yourself together man. I take a moment to compose myself.