Inanna drugged her hands through the sand while watching the waves hit the beach.
She used her other hand to bite into the sandwich. Paris has been an amazing escape but she is now ready to go back to her home.
It's been a month since Dmitri died and Paris has been like it has always been,
An escape, a thinking place to let the frustrations out.
Usually, she has a hard time functioning during times like this; her sister Alessia is always there to help her up when she falls. But her sister is having a baby, she's starting her own family and she can't always be there to help Inanna up.
Inanna has to do it herself.
The beach has always been a love of Inanna and this is where she does the most thinking.
She sang along to the song playing on the small speaker as she stared into the dark water.
The unknown.
Just like her future, she's going to run the mafia with her sister of course. But her future is still unknown.
Will Lorenzo forgive her? Will she be able to start a family, herself? Can anyone love her the same way her family loves her?
Inanna's mind always goes against her during the darkest moments.
At only eight years old, she lost her parents.
Alessia went through grieving her own way, busying herself with things to do. Her sister was the main thing she busied herself with.
Inanna mentality was destroyed. No matter how much her family and therapist tried to help her she couldn't get out of the darkness until her 10th birthday.
For one year she was so depressed that Rose and Dmitri had to figure out a way for her not to fail school, to get better, and become who she was before the death of her parents.
But no one is ever the same after the death of a loved one.
After that year, they sent her to a rehab facility to help with her depression. She was there for a year before she was released. Alessia was also sent to a facility after she tried to kill a girl for talking about her sister.
She was there for six months.
The Frost Sisters both went to therapy, until they got older. Inanna goes to a session every once in a while if she feels herself falling off the wagon, while Alessia goes mostly around the death of their parents and Rose.
The girls are broken, but who isn't?
"Oh my god."
She said, before she felt the sandwich she just digest come back up. She picked up the bag the food came in and dumped out all of the contents.
Tears fell down her face as she emptied out her stomach into the bag.
No, no, no
She thought.
She tried to ignore the signs but this was the final one.
She was supposed to get her period the day after Dmitri died but her emotions were too high to notice.
Once, she noticed she thought it was because of the stress. She tried to ignore all of the signs.
Missed period, fatigue, tender breast, moodiness, food aversions, bloating, and now vomiting.
After she got done she grabbed all of her belongings to walk back to the house.
She put everything away and disposed of the bag before grabbing the box out of the kitchen counter.
She had grabbed a pregnancy test a couple of days ago but she couldn't bring herself to take it.
She was in denial.
Even after the pregnancy test was positive.
She was going to call her sister and Lorenzo. But she couldn't bring herself to press the call.
She was still in denial.
Even after the pregnancy was proven positive by the nearby clinic. After, they did an ultrasound and showed the twin babies she was growing.
She was in denial.
All of it didn't become real until the week before she went home and she found out the genders of her babies.
It was finally real for her. She was going to be a mother, a mother to two children.
A boy and a girl.
Her future had finally shown a little light in the darkness.
And all she could think about is telling her sister and the father of her children.
