Begin Again ⭐

Chapter 19

After Bucky and I had our talk and hug session on the back porch our night went on normal. We didn't talk to each other much but things weren't tense. That night when we went to bed I was scared to sleep, I didn't want to have a nightmare because I knew Bucky would want to come and save me. I finally sighed, wrapped myself in a blanket and headed out to the porch. Bucky and I had moved the chair back to where they belonged after we hugged. I didn't see Bucky outside so I curled up in my chair and just looked at the stars.

"Stargazing?" I heard a voice ask and I looked to see Bucky and I gave him a small smile.

"Trying to, it's too cloudy." I said and Bucky smiled and sat in his chair.

"That the one thing I wish you could have had a chance to experience in Wakanda, the stars every night were amazing." Bucky said and I nodded.

"I saw them from my room the night I made a sandwich. I couldn't get back to sleep so I turned my light off and laid in bed for a while and when I couldn't sleep I left the light off but sat at the window looking at the stars." I said and Bucky nodded. I looked at him and huffed a laugh.

"What?" Bucky asked and I shook my head.

"Just thinking about our therapy session we had with Raynor...." I said and he groaned.

"Can we not?" Bucky asked.

"No, I just have to ask one question..." I said and he groaned.

"What?" Bucky asked.

"What possessed you to say what you said about being inside of me?!" I asked and we both busted out laughing. Bucky just groaned.

"All honesty?" Bucky asked.

"Yes." I said and he looked at me.

"Seeing you again...all feisty and upset...I was a little turned on." Bucky said and I was thankful for the dark night and he couldn't see my blush.

"Well that makes sense." I said and Bucky sighed.
"Yeah, sorry." Bucky said and I huffed a laugh.

"Don't be sorry. Bucky can I be honest about something?" I asked and he nodded.

"Of course." Bucky said.

"If you had let me I would have thrown you down on that table and just had my way with you in the meeting room." I said and I saw Bucky's shocked expression.
"Well until you pissed me off any way." I said and he then nodded.

"I get that." Bucky said and I smiled. We stayed silent after that just looking at the sky. I woke up the next morning and noticed I was still sitting on the porch and I was holding Bucky's hand. It was his metal hand since I was on his left side but it felt right, I didn't want to let go. I felt Bucky stir so I closed my eyes again and pretended to be asleep. When Bucky woke up and saw us holding hands he pulled my hand to his lips and kissed it.

"I will spend every waking minute showing you how sorry I am and that I love you." Bucky whispered and let go of my hand. He then saw how uncomfortable I looked in the chair and gently lifted me and carried me to my bed. He covered me up and then leaned down and kissed my cheek.

"Sweet dreams." Bucky whispered in my ear and walked out of my room. I had been fighting off tears since he kissed my hand. I didn't want to forgive him yet, it was too soon and he did too much damage. I stayed in bed knowing what day it was and I was hoping everyone would just let me do my own thing until the birthday dinner I knew was planned. After about half an hour the smell of bacon and coffee pulled me from bed and I headed downstairs.

"I knew bacon and coffee would so the trick!" Sarah said seeing me walk in.

"Good morning birthday girl!" Sam exclaimed seeing me and smiled. I smiled and hugged him.