Starstruck- Illusions are reality

Part 1

Plop. Plop.
What am I doing here?
Plop. Plop.
The water must be cold by now since I've been staring at it for minimum half an hour.
Plop. Plop.
I can't stand this sound. I can't stand the look of those bubbles and the giant bathtub that seems to laugh at me. Why am I even here? I sniff my arm and a stinging chemical smell makes my nose feel numb. That's why I'm here. If I don't wash that stuff off, well... I better do it. I force my leg to move and cling on to my towel. Anxiety makes my body feel ten times heavier.
Just breathe, I tell myself. Why am I even scared? I laugh at myself because I am so ridiculous.
Plop. Plop.
Now my toe is just millimeters above the silent surface, the only movement seems to be the steady plop when one of those drops falls. Before I start to think about it too much, I dip my toe into the water. It's so warm...
I can hear my heartbeat as if a speaker is next to me.
Do it! I tell myself.
Just do it you ridiculous idiot.
And then I am doing it. I climb into the water, my hand on the side of the tub that is as large as a normal bathroom. Then my body sinks into the hot liquid, and I feel sort of a relief. I breathe hardly, then I begin to laugh. It is indeed just water with stupid bubbles. My long hair immediately gets soaked. And the chemical smell seems to spread all over the water, then it vanishes. They must have put something into the water, so it stays clean. And warm... I glance at the dozens of beauty products beside me. Those silly pink bottles, filled with silly pink shampoo. I grab a simple bar of soap. No special smell, just soap. That feels right. Minimalism seems to be my thing.
I begin to rub the soap over my smelly skin, and it starts to get smooth. Soap is a great invention, I think. Next is my hair. Sadly, I can't find any shampoo that doesn't look at least as toxic as I smelled just minutes earlier. I moan. Fine then...
I grab a honey-yellow shampoo an open it with my pale skinny fingers. I must look terrible...
The shampoo smells exactly like the look of it. Sweet and creamy, maybe a bit like a flower that only blooms in summer. One of those with the white leaves that grow all over the meadows in late spring. God, I hate those flowers.
They remind me of...

I don't know, something is blocking my mind.
After I apply a bit of the shampoo, I rinse it off. Now my hair smells like those flowers and I am not sure whether the toxic chemicals are better or not.
I look around, then something seems to have my attention. A small metallic box. I grab it and look at the letters, that say: Bath Bomb.
Was it that supposed to be? I open it and there lies it. A ball, the size of the palm of my hand. It's also silly pink but smells different. It reminds me of icy mountains and a sweet sunset. I look at it and think about what to do with the pink ball. I try and apply it on my skin but it is rough as sand. My hair also seems to be the wrong area. Frustrated I let the thing fall into the water. It splits the surface and then sinks. But just a second later it begins to send bubbles into the big tub. I look at it in shock. Then I laugh, I laugh out loud. That's what a bath bomb is. And indeed, it looks like a silly pink explosion.
After a minute it is gone. The water absorbed it, as if it were never there. I look at the spot where I dropped it for another five minutes, then I stand up and climb out of the tub. As if it were a living creature a loud sound appears, and the water gets soaked away. Seconds later the tub is empty and dry. By the look of that I get angry, as If I wasted something special. Something that is not for guarantee.
At home, I had never taken a bath. The thought pops up in my head and I can't control it. Silly me, I am at home. Never been somewhere else. But why do I feel so lost then?