Story Of My Life *1d and 5SOS*

76

"Juul, where the fack were you?" I hear Zayn ask upset as I enter the hotel room. I cast a quick glance in Zayn's direction. Ashton is sitting next to him, Niall isn't there. "Where's Niall?" I ask emotionlessly. "He's sleeping with Louis and Harry, because Mayke is sleeping with Calum in Michael's bed, and Michael is sleeping with Luke. I sleep here..." Explains Ashton. Despite understanding everything, I only understand half of it. I nod slowly. Then I walk over to the single bed and let myself fall on it. I stare at the ceiling.

"Juul? Where have you been? It's fucking half past twelve!" Zayn asks again. I don't respond, I don't have the energy for it at the moment. "Juul?" Ashton's voice makes my name reverberate through my head. I hear footsteps, coming towards me. "Are you okay?" I feel the bed collapsing next to my head. I hear Ashton's familiar voice next to me. He strokes through my hair. In the corner of my left eye, I see Zayn on his knees next to the bed. "Are you still in over Mayke?"

I shoot up. Ashton, startled, pulls his hand back. Zayn too seems startled. "Is Mayke okay?" I ask panicked. "Yeah, she's sleeping now..." Reassures Zayn. I let myself fall back on the bed sighing. Ashton starts stroking my hair again.

"But you're not okay, by the looks of it... What's going on? Were you assaulted or something?" Ashton asks anxiously. I shake my head wildly. "Then what is it? Juul I'm really worried! You come in here and..."

"I've been talking to dad..." I interrupt Zayn. I turn my head towards him. His eyes are big and he looks at me, startled. Then I look at Ashton. His look is worried.

"That's not possible!" Zayn exclaims. He stands up and starts pacing. "How the fack is that possible? That's not possible at all..." I sit up straight, with my back against the wall. Ashton comes and sits next to me and grabs my hand. "How? What? Where?" Stammers Zayn. I bite my lip. "I bumped into him when I was looking for Mayke. I only recognised his eyes, because they look like yours. He looked good. We went to a tea house and talked..." I explain softly. "A tea house that is open at half past eleven?" Asks Ashton in surprise. I nod.

Zayn stops walking and looks at me. His gaze shows mixed feelings, including a lot of sadness. "How is he now?" She asks softly. He suddenly seems so vulnerable and small, not at all the Zayn I know. I shrug my shoulders. "No more addiction... He keeps track of everything about us. He has and wife and a little daughter, Jade. And a stepdaughter, Simone..." That he's coming to the concert I leave out. He has a hard enough time as it is.

"Does he miss us? Zayn bites his lip. His pain hurts me more. I knew Zayn missed Dad, even though he always kept his head down. But still, it hurts. "Every day. He wanted contact, but he didn't dare. Then I met him..." I reply. Zayn nods. I can see he's upset. "And now?" He asks in a trembling voice. "He gave me his number, so now I have to see if I want contact." I reply. Zayn nods again and sighs.

"He's very proud of you, Zayn." I say softly. A smile appears on Zayn's face, which quickly disappears again. "Did he say that?" He asks. I nod.

I feel Ashton squeeze my hand. For a moment I had forgotten he was there. I lay my head on his shoulder.

"Are you going to make contact?" Ashton asks. I shrug my shoulders. "Maybe... Not anyway if Zayn doesn't want to. And if Zayn wants to, preferably with him." I reply, looking at Zayn. He nods. "You can do whatever you want, I don't know yet..." He answers honestly.

"If I were you I would do it..." Says Ashton suddenly. Zayn looks at him questioningly. I don't do the hard thing of lifting my head and looking at him questioningly as well. "I mean: of course I get that you're angry, I am too. But on the other hand: it's your dad, and by the looks of it you miss him terribly too..." Explains Ashton. His big hands play with mine. Zayn sighs. He bites his lip. It's quiet for a while.

"I'm going for a walk..." Zayn mutters after a while. He walks to the door. "It's quarter to one!" I call out to him. "I know!" I hear the door slam shut. I remain sitting defeated.

"I never should have said it." Apologises Ashton in a trembling voice. I play with his long, wide fingers. "It's not your fault... Let him be." I reassure him.

815 words

Don't forget to vote