I see fire

chapter 6

I walked to my grandparents smiling. This day turned out much unexpected. Speaking of unexpected, I saw someone walking towards me from the other side of the streets. I walked faster with wider steps. I didn't want to talk. He crossed the street jogging. I looked away and jogged like him so I can get home quicker before he catches up with me.

"Trent, slow down, man" he shouted as he ran towards me

I felt a hand on my shoulder. I turned around with an angry expression on my face.

"What do you want?" I spat and threw his hand off my shoulder angrily.

"I just want to talk" He said.

"There's no talking between us, mark" I said making my point clear.

"I am sorry" he said in aloud.

"I am sorry about everything." He said as lowered his head before I could interrupt him.

"Why now?" I asked in much calmer tone but still filled with anger.

"I don't know. I just see you and I can't believe we aren't friends anymore" he said

"Well, it's too late for that. don't you think?" I said and turned around to go home.

"It wasn't even my decision." He said and came in front of me blocking my way.

"Get out of the way, mark" I said

"No" he said in a determined voice.

"I said get out of my way, mark" I said again much angrier this time.

"No, I won't" he said more determined.

"What do you want?" I shouted.

"I…I…" he said stammering.

"Just get out of the way mark. When you know what do you want, come to me or don't. It'll be even better" I said and pushed him out of the way and made my way home rather quickly because I started running once I was 2 steps away from mark.

 When I arrived ,I pushed the door open to find my parents on the couch in the living room.

"Where were you?"My father asked calmly.

"I was walking and then I saw someone I knew so we hung out" I said as much as calm as him.

"Glad you had fun because we are going home now" he said as he stood up.

"You could stay the night. All of you" my grandmother offered.

"No, thanks. We have work tomorrow and Trent" he paused and looked at me " has school but thanks anyway" he gave a warm smile.

"Let's go" my mum said.

"Let me just get my bag, yeah?" I asked as I made my way to the bedroom to get my bag.

"Okay. Got it. Let's go" I said and put the bag in front of me so they can see it.

"Goodbye" they said in unison to grandma.

"Goodbye, granny." I said ad leaned in to kiss her on the cheek.

"Goodbye" she said to us all.

She kept the door open until we all got into the car and then closed it once we started moving.

Until we got home, nothing was said about my sudden visit to grandma. Even when we got home, nothing was said about it. I went upstairs without a word. I emptied my pockets and found the pack of cigarettes. I haven't smoked the whole day. Well, that's a record for me but of course it doesn't have to stay. So I took one out and lit it. I sat on a chair and started inhaling the very much toxic smoke. I thought about Cathy. She was nice but I wondered why she talked to me in the first place. I wasn't used to  having people being friendly to me, at least not anymore. Everybody used to be friendly, actually but that is over.

Then she came into my mind. I couldn't remember how she looked like but I remembered her name, Anne. After the accident, I tried to remember her face but I couldn't, no matter how hard I tried.  maybe i just wanted to forget. I haven't thought about for 3 weeks or so.

I got up and bend down under the bed to get out a box. It had the year book in it. I sat down on the floor and opened the box. It had a thin layer of dust on it and my fingers got a little dirty. I kept the cigarette in my mouth. I got out the book and opened it. I exhaled the smoke as I took the cigarette in my fingers once more. I searched for her as my fingers skimmed the pages picture by picture. I found her.

Her full name was Anne starlasson. Her hair was black, straight and short. She had Smokey wide eyes. She had a magnificent smile that would make anyone smile back at her. Basically, she looked beautiful. I remembered her now. I had seen her. I saw her in the hallways. She was also in my history class. We even talked once when I borrowed a pencil from her. In the summer, I saw her  a couple of time riding her bike. I saw her with john in the bonfires we had on Fridays.

 She didn't deserve it.

I realized I knew her. She wasn't my best friend or even a friend but I knew her. I saw her and I heard her voice. I talked to her and listened to her. I missed her. I missed seeing her.

My eyes started tearing so I closed the book and threw it under the bed. I ran to the bathroom and threw the cigarette in the sink as I covered my eyes with my hands to stop the tears. I looked in the mirror as I put my hands down on the sink. My eyes were partly red. I was so angry I slammed my hands hard on the wall right next to the mirror. My hand hurt me but I got over it as I washed my face with water then tugged my hair backwards with my 10 fingers. I took the cigarette and flushed it in the toilet so my parents wouldn't complain. Anne was gone. There was nothing I could do about it.

When I opened the door, my mum was standing in front of it.

"Are you okay? I saw you running" she asked concerned

"Yeah, I was about to burst. I had to, you know, do it" I said awkwardly trying to hide my flooding emotions behind a shy smile.

"Okay. I hope you are better now" she said smiling lightly

"Now if you don't mind, step away because I need to go in " she said again. I stood there.

"NOW" she mouthed slowly but loudly

"Oh, sorry" I said and got out of the way.

That totally broke my sad mode but it soon came back. It was hard to ignore. That is the thing about pain, it demands to be felt.

( a tfios  line, i know)