Forbidden (18+ Only)

The Untold Truth.

Veronica.

"What is up with you? You seemed to have a different glow on your face nowadays," Daisy skeptically eyed my face leaning onto my Kitchen's counter.

"You're talking as if it's a secret that I'm sleeping with Alex," I kept my voice void of emotions, "Everybody gets that glow after having sex," I kept chopping the tomatoes, silently praying that Daisy would get satisfied with my answer.

I myself didn't want to get further into that topic.

"You know that I'm not talking about that glow," As I had thought she decided to nag, "And I look like a rat in the morning after sex, so you better not say that in front of me."

"What do you want to hear, Daisy?"

"Are you getting attached to Alexander?" She blurted out without beating around the bush.

My hands froze upon her question, all of a sudden my vocabulary seemed deserted to even speak out anything. I let go of the knife and flattened my palms onto the counter, a sigh slipped past my lips.

The flashback of a quick memory played in front of my eyes and I found myself inhaling a deep breath. The tears tried to blur my vision but I didn't let them succeed.

"You know I'm not going to make the same mistake twice. I've got myself ruined once and I'm not going to let it happen again," My voice grew harsh at the end.

Daisy sighed shaking her head and walked closer to me, "You didn't get me right," She made me turn around to face her, "It's not a bad thing to get attached to someone, you can't keep yourself stuck to the same period for your whole life."

My brows lightly scrunched due to confusion, "What do you mean? Because as long as I can remember you are the one who told me probably a month ago that I should not let myself catch feelings for Alexander."

"Veronica, that was before," Daisy began, "Plus if he makes you happy and treats you right then there should be no space for me to say anything or stop you from doing anything or getting close to anyone."

I remained silent, I didn't even know if I could consider letting anyone step into my life again. The constant fear of getting broken again pestered me. The fear of getting into the same turmoil and falling into the same hopelessness had kept me caught in the same space.

"Don't push away someone who cares for me." Daisy comfortably squeezed my hand.

"My own parents didn't care for me, Daisy! The person I loved more than my life dumped me on the second day he took my virginity. I would've been on the streets or probably dead if that kind woman hadn't saved me when the storm had almost taken my life."

Daisy's eyes softened, she knew all of it. The tragic memories that were the truth of my life--She wasn't unaware of any of it.

"Veronica, calm down," She walked closer and raised her hand to wipe my tears but I pulled away. My thoughts were too far of a mess to even understand anything other than escaping the sudden suffocation the remembrances had brought to me, the only I found was to speak out. Whatever that was trying to tear through the surface.

"The only person I've ever trusted and dared to love dumped me on the day after taking my virginity. Leaked the video to his friends who would laugh at me every time they saw me. My entire life in high school turned into hell." My voice got louder and the tears ran more down to my cheek, "I've learned to live by being like this. The Veronica Stratford who slept with every single Playboy she has ever met but was never given the chance to break her heart!"

"Veronica..."She tried to speak but I cut her off.

"And you are telling me that I shouldn't push away someone who you think supposedly cares about me? How the fuck did you know that out of all guys Alexander Vincent is the one who cares for me?" I bitterly chuckled.

Daisy's lips were firmly pressed together upon my question. The sudden hesitancy appeared quicker I had expected, she opened and closed her mouth a couple of times before she finally spoke.

"Alexander reached out to me."

Despite my in a tussle of my messed-up thoughts, her words caught every bit of my attention.

"What are you trying to say?"

She heaved out a low breath and I saw the rapid closing of her eyelids before she spoke up.

"He called me yesterday, he wanted to know somethings about you," She admitted, "He thinks something is holding you back, keeping you reserved. He thinks you are not exactly what you show. He wants to learn about whatever is holding you back, he wants to know the real you."

"The real me? He fucking tells you that he wants to learn about the person I had killed long ago and you being my best friend is here to tell me to jump into the same grave again?!" I shouted, "Let myself be open and fall into the same pitfall again? Get myself more fucked up than I already am? Let him see the scars so that he can hit the same places too?"

"You can't judge everyone on the same scale, Veronica!" Her voice was louder this time, "Of you keep doing that, one day you'll lose the most precious and important moments of your life with those persons who really deserved a chance."

Everything of me wanted to believe in her words. As Alex's face flashed in front of my eyes I felt the need to get a hold of its fears but at the same time, I was fearful. I was scared and traumatized.

As easy as it seemed, it was not that easy.

"What did he want to know?" I found myself questioning.

"He wanted to know about your past."

Every cell of my body froze upon her sentence, the darkest memories I didn't want anyone to see or discover even kept separated from my own self. Alexander wanted to know about them. He wanted to see the cracks I had kept hidden the whole time.

"Did you tell him?" My voice came out shaky.

"No, I didn't." She said and my shoulders relaxed, the slightest bit of relief I got from her words.

"But I really think, you should tell him. You can't keep it hidden for your whole life." She added, her eyes soft and tone gentle.

My gaze shot at her in disbelief, "You want me to disclose what I had hidden for my own good? You want him to make any decision based on the pity he would feel for me due to the crippling misery of my past?"

" You can't walk into a fresh start if you have a huge burden hanging on your shoulder, try to understand. You need to let go of things and consider them as a part of your growth, no matter how much somehow have wronged you at the very least you should not let what they've come to you in the past affect your beautiful future."

Everything seemed too much. Her words, the tussle of my thoughts, the rise of my heartbeat. I took frequent steps backward shaking my head, trying to get a hold of myself but no gain. It was just too much to even handle.

"I don't wanna talk about anything, Daisy," I shook my head exhaling a heavy breath, "Just go," I turned around and strode for my room.

I could hear Daisy's voice continuously calling my name but I ignored her and shut the door of my bedroom before I let myself sink against the door. My years of a strong exterior faded in the dark and tears streamed down my face.

In the darkness alone in the room, hugging her knees and letting go of the cries she had been surprising for years, sat the real Veronica who had more scattered pieces of her than a broken beautiful vase.