The Story of Us

Chapter Five

"And all the pain I put you through, I wish I could take it all away"

He wakes up before sunrise.

He searches for his phone in the dark and takes a look at the time once he finds it.

It's no surprise anymore that he can't bring himself to sleep more than three or four hours at night since..

Well, since she came back to the Island.

He brings his hands to his face and massages the sides of his scalp with his fingertips.

His head is a big mess of thoughts and feelings and he just doesn't know how to separate them. All he knows is that the more he thinks, the more he hurts. But he just can't stop thinking, about her, about them, but also about how fucked up this whole situation is and at how, again, no matter what he does he will end up hurting someone else.

He gets up and decides to head to the kitchen and prepare some tea. The house is still quiet but he can hear Zorba walking around right outside the door. He takes his cup in his hand and goes outside, greeting his old friend with a pat on his back.

He takes him for a small walk and they end up at the dock behind the house, where they sit down and wait for the sun to rise over the horizon. He checks the time again, then puts his phone into the pocket of his jeans and takes a look at his surroundings. The silence of the winter morning in the island is outstandingly loud, the only sound coming from the small sea waves that crush slowly against the wooden base of the dock.

He suddenly realizes that he is waiting for Haziran to pass by for her morning run. Not only is he waiting for her, he has his eyes glued to the direction where she usually comes from and he's hoping with his whole being that she will pass by while he's still there.

What the hell are you doing. He wants to punch himself for his own behavior. But he doesn't move, he just stays there and waits. And waits. And waits.

And then he realizes that she will not come, that he will not have an excuse to see her by pure coincidence.

He realizes that this time he doesn't know how to live a life where she doesn't exist.

But then again his conscience laughs at him and reminds him that he was the one to end things with her, that he was the one to let her go and that he was the one that gave up on the most valuable treasure he ever had by his side.

So he just gives a last look at the sea waves that remind him of the color of her eyes, breathes in the salty breeze and then gets up. Zorba gives him a resigned look as he waits for his owner to get up and go back inside.

"You wanted to see her too, huh?" He ruffles his ears and they both head back into the house.

When he enters he finds his grandma at the kitchen preparing a very abundant breakfast.

"Babaanne don't count on me for breakfast, I have to leave for the hotel" the old woman is turned towards the counter, her hands busy cutting tomatoes and cucumbers.

"Poyraz I invited Naz to have breakfast with us, you can't leave." He closes his eyes and takes a deep breath.

"You should've told me yesterday. I can't stay, I have a meeting." He goes into his room to change, realizing that he will probably be late. He can hear Aliye's voice come from the kitchen, complaining that he works too much.

"You should take some time for yourself, son. You've been stressing yourself too much with work between the hotel and the thousands of side jobs you've taken. I don't understand why you choose to work so much when you could easily just work a few hours a day and actually be able to dedicate time to your own life"