[Hellion Brothers: Book #6] The Obstinate's Credence

A/N

Good day everyone ~

It's been a while, no? How have you been? I hope all of you are doing well today. I've realized that it's been almost a year since this story's Chapter 1 has been released and guilt is starting to eat me for ignoring the story for a long time.

I would like to sincerely apologize for my absence. I was coped up in my personal sh*ts, thus, I was unable to publish any chapter.

In this note, I would like to share some of my experiences during the past year. Feel free to skip to the last part if in case you aren't interested.

Things have been so hard and the year 2021 was quite a harsh year for me and my family. One after another, problems aroused and I began to lose interest in everything around me.

I stopped doing the things I like; reading novels and manhwas (and some manga too), watching kdramas and anime, dancing, and most of all, I stopped writing and ignored wattpad for quite sometime.

In short, I lost my meaning of the word "fun".

I lost my former job when it closed (due to pandemic, I guess) and I was unemployed for awhile. Fortunately, I got a new job earlier in 2021.

It was around May last year when things started to get complicated. My grandma got sick and went back and forth until finally, she got admitted in the hospital. My grandpa and Mom were the one who took care of her while my dad became the one who provides the necessities needed. I wasn't even able to visit her because the hospital forbids visitors in order to limit the number of  people inside and of course, prevent Covid19 from spreading.

I had a lot of role to take during that time. A daughter, an older sister, and a mother regent. Despite being a 2nd child and the eldest daughter, I have to be the one they can rely on; both my parents and my siblings. Our eldest brother is away so no one else can take the role aside from me. I have to be a pillar of strength.

Aside from that, I am also an employee. And work didn't make it any better. The (feeling) superiors weren't really nice and I got involved in a dating rumor (WHICH IS SUCH AN EFFIN' NONSENSE and dating isn't allowed inside the company, fyi). Because of that and because of my frequent tardiness as of late, I got suspended for 16working days.

We were left with such a huge debt. Hospital expenses for just a day were quite an amount of money which is equivalent to my monthly salary. Our minds were in haywire, not knowing where to get money so we can pay all of our expenses.

Our house became a collateral for our debt and electricity got cut off for being unable to pay our bills. I was really devastated but I can't show it. My siblings rely on me and they weren't fully aware of our circumstances so I have to keep it in and be strong. It's not a time for me to crumble.

Friends were nowhere to be found and my workmates were unaware of my situation because I can't really talk about it. I can't find myself to confide to them and just thinking about it makes me teary. And I can't make myself cry infront of anyone.

July 11,2021, around 10pm in the evening, my grandmother bid her last farewell.

It hurts me the most to know that I was unable to do anything. During that day, I have a strong urge to visit her in the hospital. It seems like something tells that I should go. But I refused. I told myself I shouldn't be thinking negatively not knowing it would be one of my biggest mistake in my whole life.

Fate gave me signs, and I chose to ignore it. Now all I'm left with are regrets and there's no one else to blame but myself.

It also hurts to watch grandfather try to be strong while his eyes were filled with sorrowful tears and heart full of longing for his beloved.

We were busy for the funeral. After that, we became busy trying to pay off all our debt. Fortunately enough, after several months, we were finally able to reclaim our house and pay off most of our debts.

I am so grateful to God for making sure we'll get back on our feet despite all of these happenings. We were fine now.

It made me stronger and lots of realization came to me. One of those being;

"Not all of your friends can be considered as real friends."

They can be with you to hung out and during happy times. But once you get on a bad situation, you can't guarantee that they'll be there for you nor will they help you. So choose you friends wisely.

(Shoutout to my bestfriend who I was able to confide myself a week before d-day. Thank you for finally letting me get those loads out of my chest and let out all those pressure that I felt. I don't think you'll see this since you're not the reader type of person but incase you're reading this without me knowing, please know that I am so grateful to have you in my life.)

Right now, I am recuperating for both my health and my heart. I am starting to get back on my track and retaking all of my "fun" things. That includes writing.

I can't guarantee how long it'll take me to update once again, but I'll keep trying. :) My contract in the company was only until holidays and since the holidays are now over, I am currently unemployed (not that I'm proud of it tho. Hahaha). Now that I somehow have time for myself, I'm gonna try to write again little by little. Please cheer for me.

P.S. if anyone of you are experiencing such a hard time in their lives right now, do not hesitate to reach out to me. I'll try my best to help as much as I can. /(*3*)/

Xoxo, Ms. Author