Lover- [Tom Holland×Reader]

40- I'm always here for you

Y/n's P.O.V

"C'mon Alex, sit still." Stefanie, the make up artist, yelled.
"Where's my mic?"
"Does anyone have pastilles? Grether's Pastilles?"
"I need water!"
The green room was chaotic, to say the least. My heart had been thumping in my chest ever since I'd woken up. But Tom would be here, so I felt a bit calm thinking about that. Even though he hurt me, he was still my comfort person. I felt this weird sense of relief and satisfaction every time I saw him.

"Sylvie, you're on in 2." the stage manager called out.
We were performing in the Tisch audiorium. The stage had a dome like structure as a frame, lights hanging from the ceiling. The hall could fit in about 700 people and we apparently had a full house.
Our band's lead singer, Kylie, cancelled last moment because she had a sore throat and fever. So Mr Mendoza put a lot of faith in me and requested me to sing in her place. I thought about saying no but every inch of my body told me to go for it. And thus, I said yes.
So now, instead of just performing my solo, I was going to sing with the band as well. And the nerves were not going easy on me.
"All the best Syl." I smiled.
"Thanks Y/n." she pressed my shoulder.

I put a pastille in my mouth when I saw a text pop up on my phone's screen.

Sof: best of luck girl, you're gonna kill this!!! dont panic, try to stay calm and take deep steady breaths.
Me: thanks Sof, will do♡

I let out a shaky breath and took a sip of water. I had 45 minutes before I had to go on stage. Everyone else in the room were either doing duets or trios, so they went out to get ready for their recitals in the rehearsal lounge.
"See you in the lounge eh?" Brandon asked.
"Yeah I'll be there in a bit." I nodded.

My phone rang and surprisingly it was Tom.
"Hey what's up?" I said.
"Hey where are you?"
"Um in the green room?" I frowned.
"Alright I have sent a little something for you, come out for a sec."
"O-Okay."
I got up from my seat and walked out, looking right and then left. Nothing.
"Tom there's nothing he-" I trailed off as Tom appeared in front of me.
A huge grin crept onto my face, my heart suddenly felt light. Tom had a smile on his face which made me forget everything for a moment. I hung up the call and ran into his arms, burying my head into the crook of his neck, inhaling the cologne he was wearing.
"Tom what are you doing here?" I asked, still hugging him.
"I bought backstage passes."
"That's great." I bit my lip as he pulled away.
"You okay?" he asked.
"Mhmm yeah." I gulped, "Wanna uh hang out here? I still have time before I gotta go on stage."
"Sure."
As we sat on the couch, I started feeling a bit uneasy. My chest tightened but I just ignored it, thinking it was the nerves.
"So how're you feeling?" I heard him say.
"F-F-Fine." I bit my bottom lip, trying to catch my breath.
"C-Can yo-you please uh c-c-close th-the uh- door...p-please." I pleaded, shaking my leg.
Tom did that at once and sat beside me, this time a bit closer.
"Y/n are you okay?" I could hear the concern in his voice but I couldn't speak. My throat was closing up as my hands started shaking
"Oh my god, Y/n/n you're having an attack."
I stood up and started pacing around the room, my body shuddering, tears welling up in my eyes. I gasped, struggling to catch my breath. I collapsed on the floor. I put my hands on my head, letting the tears flow but it wasn't just a normal crying session. I felt like I was suffocating, dying. The room was quite big but it felt as if the walls were closing in.
I felt a pair of strong arms wrap around me as I buried my face in between my knees and hands.
"Y/n listen to my heartbeat. You hear that?" I replied with a nod. "Now try to follow it. Try to follow my breathing."
I listened to Tom's heartbeats, letting out small shaky breaths of my own.
"I-I-I c-can't T-Tom. I-I c-can't d-do thi-this." I finally said.
"Yes, you can. Y/n you're one of the most talented and incredible people I've met. You're gonna go out there and be your fucking amazing self okay?" he rubbed soothing circles on my back. "Follow my breathing, calm down." Tom kissed my forehead, tightening his grip around me.
I tried to relax by hearing his heart beat. It was so calming, I could listen to it all day. I held his hand for support finally taking in a deep breath. I was still trembling but I felt a huge burden being lifted off of my chest.
"C-Can yo-you g-g-get me som-some w-water?" my voice quivered.
"Yeah..there you go." Tom handed me a bottle, still holding onto me.
I took a sip and wiped away my tears. Tom got in front of me, kneeling down to reach my height and took my face in to his hands. He brushed his thumb across my face.
"You're okay. You're okay, love."
"I-I'm okay." I nodded.

Tom engulfed me in another hug and rubbed circles on my back and arms.

"I've got you. I'm always here for you."