Two days later I was still looking for some sort of solution for my problem. Time was my worst enemy right now. I even decided to stay sober today so I could focus on finding a job. I made many phone calls, wrote even more e-mails but still nothing. I'm desperate at this point but there's no way I'm calling my mom to ask for some money. I made peace with leaving my beloved small apartment and started to pack my things. I could ask for a place to stay for a few days from my friends if I didn't push them all away from me, so that's not an option either. I have one more option though but I will try to do everything to avoid that. There's a small house nearby where I used to spend all my summers at with my family. It's now empty and I haven't been there in almost five years. I can't step a foot inside that house, there are way too many memories in that place. But I guess I could deal with it if I must, it's better than the streets. My plan is to find a job and try to save up as much money as I can so I can quit again and enjoy life for a few more months. I was thinking about taking the deal Niko has offered me. He would pay for me and my only job would be basically just to hang out with him. I was part of the theatre club in middle school so it shouldn't be that hard. If I didn't meet him the way I did I would totally have been down for the idea because it would be an exciting experience. I can't believe that I'm actually considering calling him. But the best word to describe me is probably'spontaneous'. As this thought has crossed my mind I picked up my phone quickly before I could change my mind. I looked through my contacts and stopped when I saw his name. I haven't been this nervous in a while this is going to be so embarrassing. With a final click on the screen, the phone was already ringing. It didn't take him too long to pick up. "Uhm hey, it's.." I started speaking quietly but he interrupted me. "I knew you would call." I could imagine him smirking while he said that. I instantly regretted reaching out to him. "No you didn't." I replied quickly. "Well I was hoping you would." He said. I was really considering ending the call but I didn't. "So how do we do this?" I was waiting for him to reply but it took him a second. "Why don't we meet up first and then discuss all the details? I'm free this afternoon." I rolled my eyes at him even though I knew he couldn't see me. I wasn't prepared to meet him today but the sooner we meet the sooner this whole thing will be over so I agreed to meet him at a pub at 5 PM. Currently it was 1 o'clock so I hopped in the shower, washed my hair and shaved my whole body because the situation was almost getting out of hand. I let my hair air dry as I started doing my skincare routine and my makeup. I love doing my makeup it's sort of like a therapy for me and my hobby as well. I always do colourful eyeshadow with fun eyeliner and I love making it look more interesting with rhinestones, glitter and stickers. I always wanted to be a makeup artist like those people on YouTube but I was way too anxious to film and post myself, so I flushed that idea down the toilet. Today I did a green look with a huge eyeliner to keep it simple.
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I straightened my hair and went to the living room where my clothes were already packed in suitcases. I picked out a dark green turtleneck which was cropped very short that it didn't even cover my chest and put on a black tank top underneath. I paired these items with black wide leg jeans and a green belt. By the time I finished I had about 20 minutes to get to the pub but it turned to a 35 minute walk. I didn't want to seem rude by being late but I had to stop at the store to get some liquid courage even though I didn't want to drink today. I finished my beer right before I arrived to the place where we agreed to meet. I walked in and looked around but I couldn't see him. I was scarred for a second that he stood me up and didn't come but then I heard him coming in in a rush. "I'm sorry I'm late, I didn't know what to wear." He was out of breath I could tell he was in hurry. He walked up to a table and made a gesture with his hand, ordering me to sit down. "And that's what you decided on?" I asked while smiling at him. I looked down at what he was wearing and he had simple black jeans and a black hoodie on with a band's logo on it which I wasn't familiar with. His long hair was in a messy bun. "Why, you don't like it?" He laughed and did a little movement to show off his outfit. "You look beautiful." He said not letting me answer. I whispered a quiet 'Thank you'. Not because I was blushing or being shy I just never knew how to respond to compliments. He ordered us two beers and I could tell he was nervous by the sound of his voice. I wasn't nervous, more like embarrassed. "So?" I asked while taking a sip from my beer. He looked at me confused like he didn't know what I was trying to ask. I rolled my eyes and started to speak again. "How are we going to do this?" "Oh, straight to business. Well then first, we discuss a price of course." He started offering me prices but they were way too high and I couldn't accept that much money from him so I told him to lower it. How does he even have this much money and why is it worth it for him? We agreed on half of the amount he first offered but it was still more than I was ever imagined. We almost finished our beers when he ordered two more. "What do I have to do? How do you want me to act? What's your type? Do you want me to act like your type? Do you want me to act interested in you?" I attacked him with many questions because I had no idea what I'm about to face. "Woah" he laughed. "I want you to be fully yourself. I don't want you to act like anything, just do what you normally would, say what you would normally say. You don't need to act like my type, I want to get to know you. And don't pretend you like me, be honest." He continued. I can't do this, I thought I was going to have to act. I'm good at acting but not so good at being genuine. "What if you won't like the real version of me?" I asked in a worried voice. He smiled and finished his second beer. "Well, that sucks." He laughed once again. Yes that does suck. That would be so awkward if I couldn't win his heart, my confidence would go down so bad. " But we should let the future decide that." I could tell he was enjoying the situation. He stood up and went to the bar leaving me with my messy thoughts. Soon he was coming back with a plate in his hands that had like ten shots on it. "The most important thing is.." he sat down and paused for a few seconds. He was starting into my eyes as he continued. "Feel free to leave whenever you want and you don't have to do anything you don't want to,okay?" He said emphasising the word 'anything'. This guy actually seemed really nice I had no doubt he was a great person. I nodded as a reply. "Let the game begin!" He said while raising a small glass like he was about to make a toast but that's all he said. I picked up a shot as well and clicked our glasses together with a smile on my face. This is exciting, not gonna lie.
