SORRY HAVENT POSTED IN A WHILE
I just haven't had much motivation
vinnie and I were on call just talking he was... somewhere I didn't ask him that yet "uh I forgot to ask you,where are you right now I just kinda woke up and you were gone" it was silent for a while "I'm in the hype garage working on my cars"
he was stuttering? "oh well when are you coming back?" Silent again "why are you asking so many questions give it up" he hung up.
this is the 6th time he has said he have been working on his cars I mean I trust him because I know how hard it is to fix cars but he has not been giving me any attention even when he is home
I stop overthinking and put my phone on the charger then turned off the lamp on my night stand. I start overthinking some more
what if he doesn't love me anymore?
what if he is fucking another girl...his dream girl
blonde
big boobs
big ass
funny
good style
fuck he's probably cheating no no no no no he can't be right? Why would he give me a promise ring if he won't keep his promise
I miss him so much I then remembered that he bought me a big teddy bear for my to cuddle with when he wasn't their so then I grabbed the teddy bear and laying on its "chest"
Vinnie sprayed my favorite cologne on it so I can imagine if being him and I knew tomorrow I would wake up in his arms.
1 year later
I woke up to an empty space of bed for the 100th time turns out vinnie didn't come back and ever since that call he has never talked to me since then
I spent 6 months of my life depressed and still waiting for him to text me,call me, anything. I partially got over it and stopped waiting for a guy that was clearly not going to talk to me again
I get out of my bed brush my teeth,kinda do my hair I'm still working on that. I walked out of my room went to Netflix and played "YOU" on my living room tv. I cook some breakfast went to my couch and started watching the show
Ever since vinnie ghosted me my parents basically banned me from coming home because they think that I did something wrong and like vinnie more than they like me
So I haven't been over their in a while haven't had human interaction in a while to but I'm not complaining because I like this lifestyle of not having to worry about anything or anyone
My phone is very dry,well it's filled with messages from the hype house saying that I should visit vinnie and how he is doing so horrible but I couldn't give less of a shit of how vinnie is doing
Because I'm sure that it's not even half as much as pain that he caused me.the amount of times that I was a inch close to killing myself times where I had a knife up to my fucking neck.
But nobody needs to know that I'm here and I'm walking so that should be enough for everybody.
I here a ding! and I just ignore it thinking it was a scam text until their are multiple dings! I groan and flip over my phone to see a text from Thomas
saying I should come over. Should I come over? I haven't talked to people in like a year but I like it this way but it can't be healthy ugh
I guess I will go but only for a little bit and see what they want. I throw on a shirt and some jeans and get out of my apartment
SKIP
I pull up the house and I'm really nervous to see vinnie and to see everyone since I haven't talked to anybody in a year
I walk out and take some deep breathes telling myself I'm going to be fine. My hands were shaking, I was breathing really hard and sweating.
I knock on the door not to hard but not gentle I start hearing footsteps getting louder and I'm a nervous wreck and then I see
Thomas and Mia smiling at me
"hey y/n it's been a while come in" I just smile at them and walk in everything looks exactly the same like it has not been touched. I go up to everyone greet them have some small talk
I then hear footsteps coming down the stairs and I already know it's vinnie because he is the only person missing. He walks down and he looks pretty bad
He has dark circles under his eyes he's in a hoodie his hood is up head is down and he has his hands in his hoodie pocket. He looks up and his face turns white his eyes looks like it's about to pop out
He stopped walking and just looked at me I was looking at him staring into his sad eyes I soon begin to see his eyes start to water I furrow my eyebrows he then realizes so he turns around and quickly walk back up to his room.
I feel bad I mean even though I hate him I don't want him to be sad he truly does deserve the best. "we forgot to tell him you were coming" Thomas lightly chuckles trying to lighten up the mood.
"wait can you guys describe how he's been acting and the way he responds to stuff" I say my breath shaking "he never comes out of his room,he is really dry when he does talk to us w-" i interrupt "wait what does he wear mostly" "hoodies and sweatpants"
"has there been a day where he hasn't?" "no...I also did hear him cry walking to his room" fuck
"oh my god" I start to panic my heart is racing I'm sweating my hands are shaking " what's wrong why are you shaking?"
"Because he has acted like this when we are dating and I soon found out that he...started cutting and since he is acting the same exact way then he could be cutting again.I was the only person who helped him and please don't tell him I told you it would make him feel even worse."
"but I have to go talk to him I'm gonna be right back"
I run upstairs really worried for him I walk up to his room and here music playing and over that I can hear faint sobs coming from the door
This can't be good
Sorry haven't posted I really didn't have any motivation for anything but I'm good now so yay
