You are home.

addiction.

"Damn, So you really like Jules huh?" I tease Rue as she giggles, She just ranted on about Jules for an hour, but it makes me feel a lot better that she wants her and Jules to be in a relationship rather than best friends, because im her best friend, and I don't want to be replaced.

"okay sooooo Rue. I really like Fez"
i blurt out.

"REALLY!! Melody! You guys would be so cute"

I roll my eyes and laugh, trying to play it off cool even though i am jumping up and down inside that she said that.

"Like the night you went off with Jules, He took me home and put me to bed, Today he didn't even make me pay for my drink, like i even accidentally undressed infront of him last night" i nudge Rue and we laugh together.

We laugh on for hours. I love her so much.

My hands are shaky and i am sweating from going a whole day without drugs though. I tell Rue i feel Ill and leave to head home.

As soon as i get home i run to my room and pull the last few pills out from the bag, Rue had a lot of our shit this morning.

I swallow the 3 pills with some stale orange juice from last week and wait until it hits me,

i lay back on my bed as the happiness hits me, the numbness, the euphoria.

But its not enough, 3 pills wasn't enough?

It angers me, I rummage through cupboards looking for anything that will complete my high, but theres nothing.

Fez will give me some shit, surely?

I run to his house in the rain, the street lamps blinding me

a stitch forms in my side and my head is filled with angry thoughts, i hate drugs sometimes, but i love them, and i don't know how i could ever quit.

Its around 5 minutes before i reach his house running, my hair is drenched and i'm in leggings and a vest, which of course, just had to go see through, making me look like such a whore.

God this is going to be so embarrassing if he doesn't give me what i want.

what i seriously need.