SELF HARM TW‼️
I run home, of course its Thundering and lightning. Im sobbing and i cant quite seem to catch my breath. The air is cold and it feels like smoke when i breath it in.
I need drugs, but i cant go to Fez
what i'm about to do is so fucking dumb
I peer into Rues room from outside her slightly open window and realise she isn't home. I celebrate under my breath. I slowly and quietly climb into her room through the window while holding my breathe. I know exactly where her stash is, we've been friends for too long for me not too know.
I lift up her mattress and slip out a whole bottle of pills, i put the bottle in my bra and climb back out the window. As i'm closing it I hear her mom shout her name.
"Fuck" I mutter, i close the window slightly more and I run home, not crying as hard now, but mine and Fez's argument keeps popping into my head, it was so obviously all my fault, and i cant keep doing that if i want this too work.
I slide upstairs to my room and shut the door.
I stair into the mirror opposite my bed and look at myself. What am i doing? Is this what i want?
a voice in my head tells me to ignore those questions and take a few pills. This is hardcore shit so i can only have i few. Its to tempting not too, i've already stolen them now. I take 2 and i lie back on my bed, feeling incredibly satisfied. But the drugs just bring all of the feelings back, it's overwhelming and i don't like it.
I hit my leg a few times to relieve the stress, i've always had to do this. Its too much. Loosing Rue, Loosing Fez, Relapsing. I cry harder now. I run to the bathroom and grab a blade and lift up my sleeve.
I stare into the mirror, realising i don't recognise myself. Who is this weak little girl in the mirror? Is that who I am now?
The stressful feelings soon fade away as the blade pierces my skin, leaving 6 red lines across my wrist, the blood runs off onto my floor, but soon stops when i pat it. I throw on a long sleeve jumper and some shorts, and climb into bed.
My phone buzzes and i see Fez's name. It is hard to read when your on drugs but i think it says ;
"Im sorry."
I love him.
"I know. Im sorry too" I reply.
YOU ARE READING
You are home.
General Fictionmelody and fezco, pls read, you wont regret it♥️ When Melody and Rue return from rehab, they don't plan on staying clean, that is until Melody is introduced to the town drug dealer, her life flips upside down as she is forced to choose her love for...