Drafted- A Story Of Heroes

8

Everything costs something. Everything. Damn it! How can I even write? Write about the things I'm seeing? Hearing? Doing? Can I even go back home? Fen and Jones made a joke yesterday...it was about how good the food tasted. Like shit, and how much shit it gave us. It wasn't funny, not even to them. As you can see, I was avoiding it. This: Gilligan, Porter, Michel, Terrence, Nos, Lerant, Sydney, Collins, Adam, Black, Hamilton, Green, Smith, Brown, Johnson, Wilson, Nelson, Lee, Moore, Jackson, and Martin. Rest in peace, you were good men.

Jones and Fen were talking about how moody I've been. The only things they have in common are the military and myself. Since they don't want to talk about the military, they use me as their amusement. I write. Linda and Geo's letter arrived the other day. I didn't want that to be the only thing I write about so I waited. They are eating well, but they miss me. Geo is staying home for the remainder of the year due to the school shutting down because of the war. It'll start up again once the war comes to an end. Gilligan, Porter, Michel, Terrence, Nos, Lerant, Sydney,Collins, Adam, Black, Hamilton, Green, Smith, Brown, Johnson, Wilson, Nelson, Lee, Moore, Jackson, Martin, you already know what I'm going to say, but that won't stop me. You didn't deserve this, rest in peace.

When you can't sleep they tell you to count sheep. I counted until I couldn't because I lost track. We heard over the radio that the enemy was moving in. They haven't arrived....But when will they? Fen told me, I'll know when they arrive. I hope he's right. Jones is keeping watch along with a group of men while we sleep. I'm going to offer to switch with him. Goodnight Georgia, Linda.

I couldn't write for a few days. I almost died again, right through the shoulder. I was dragged back by Fen. I was taken to the medics back at base. I was forced to go back out after the enemies also came to base. I killed some of them. Names Jilkens, Goren, and Lion. God, please don't abandon me. The guilt on my chest right now makes me feel like I can't breath. I've killed before, but I never saw their faces. I never knew their names... I was pulled back inside after I fainted. Blood loss can happen quick. They were worried I'd die there and then. Fen and Jones were by my side through it all. Lives lost that week: Ferguson, Pulant,  Harris, White, Jilkens, Goren and Lion. I can't speak for the last three but you were good men, and I know where you're going. More were lost from our allies, as they were first to come into contact. We were lucky.

"Everyday is to be taking slowly. If you take to much in at once, you'll fail to make it to tomorrow." Wise words from Jones. That was his pep talk of the day. He failed to mention the fact that half our men are dead or injured so if they tried, they'd also be dead. I can't wait to go home. I can't wait to stop putting names on the list of deaths we've had. I can't wait to make it home. There's no place like home. Gilligan, Porter, Michel, Terrence, Nos, Lerant, Sydney,Collins, Adam, Black, Hamilton, Green, Smith, Brown, Johnson, Wilson, Nelson, Lee, Moore, Jackson, Martin, Ferguson, Pulant, Harris, White, (another) Smith, Clark, and Young. You...will be missed. 

We've gotten word that they are sending more men. Why can't they pull us out and give up on this god forsaken place? I just want to scream.  Jones and Fen have managed to gamble my out five pennies. That's all I have. But they keep trying to get me to play more. Jokes on them, there's nothing to buy here. No deaths. I am running out of paper, I'll need to write their names less. I'm sorry...So fucking sorry. 

Day.... who the fuck knows? We've been here for about a month now. Letters from Geo and Linda are the only things I look forward to. Because of lack of family, Jones and Fen write to them as well. We've become family. My brothers, sister and my soon to be wife. I'm perfectly fine with this situation. We are moving closer to the center of everything. We've moved past about three fights on our sides. We want Wilk the capital of this damned country. Once we take it, they'll pull out from here. At least thats what our leaders hope for. I'm starting to trust them more. We haven't lost since.... that's right, our first engagement with the enemy. It feels like only yesterday that I was shot in my shoulder and Fen the back. Jones is suffering now, broken pinky toe. All our injuries and no one has been allowed to go home. My hands mostly healed but still suffers from phantom pains. Jones told me that it'll be that way for the rest of my life. I respectfully disagreed. When I was around six I broke my leg, it doesn't hurt. He then told me that is was because I can barely remember the accident. I guess he's right.

Geo found a puppy outside. Linda let her keep it, she thinks it'll help her feel better. I agreed and told her to let the puppy stay in my room. But they sleep in my room. They share the bed to be closer to me. I could possibly be crying. Fen just walked in on me and laughed his ass off until he read the letters himself. Geo and Fen have gotten along....quite well. I think the match is only something that could have happened this way. They write to each other more than I write in the book. Jones writes things that a father or a brother would write to Geo. He doesn't write much to Linda. He doesn't think its appropriate. The other men are my family, but these two...they are my close family. And Fen might actually be apart of my family. And all that, only a few more deaths. I've refrained myself from writing their names until Linda gets me a new Journal. But they will be missed and honored.