Jeans | Y.Jw

| 17 |

I let out a small sigh as I shoved my hands into my pockets, looking out over the black water that quietly crashed against the harbour wall bellow me. My feet dangled slowly and kicked against the harbour wall behind me every once in a while.

I hadn't walked home after I left the Green Lion, I didn't really feel like it. I felt more like sitting in my own world, trying to figure out what was happening in my head.

I probably was beginning to fall for Jungwon, that was for sure, but for what? Because he's been nice to me a few

 times? I seriously had to get myself in order, I can't just go falling in love with everyone who does something nice to me. It wasn't healthy and when it's someone like Jungwon I'm just setting myself up for heartbreak.

"I knew you would be here," a familiar voice spoke up as I felt a pair of hands put weight down on my shoulders.

"Can't you just leave me alone?" I sighed before the pressure on my shoulders disappeared and Jungwon sat down beside me, shoving his hands into his pockets like my own.

"Nope," he shortly replied before looking over at me with a bit too much energy for what was normal for him, "because I acted like an asshole and you deserve an explanation."

"The explanation I want is just for you to leave me alone," I grumbled as I sent him a glare before eventually looking back out over the water in front of me, "you only bring trouble and misery with you and I don't need that."

"Hear me out will you?" he questioned as he gave me a tired look, "and then you can tell me to sod off."

"Why would I want to hear you out?" I questioned in disbelief, even letting out a small snort, "James just wanted to be nice and keep me company."

"And I don't like James," Jungwon defended.

"Because he was talking to me," I reminded him, to which he just shrugged giving me a look that just screamed it was obvious for him to be annoyed by James, "oh come on you can't actually be jealous of that."

"Why not?" he calmly questioned, "why couldn't I be jealous?" 

"Why would you be?" I let out a small laugh to prove to him how ridiculous it sounded.

"Because he talked to you," Jungwon shrugged, "and I have a tendency of getting jealous quite easily," he calmly explained as if it was just casual, eventually looking at me to see how confused I looked, "oh come on Jiyeon, you can't pretend like you didn't spare it one thought that I was being oddly nice to you. How oblivious do you have to be?"

"Holy shit you fancy me," I whispered and he just nodded, "no, no, no. That's not good," I whispered and immediately looked down at the water long below me.

"Why not?" Jungwon let out a small laugh as I closed my eyes tightly, rubbing my face with both my hands, "why's that bad?"

"I can't let myself actually fall for you," I whispered and pinched the bridge of my nose, "it's bad enough I suspected I had those feelings already, I don't need you to add onto it."

"You had what feelings already?" he almost exclaimed at me, "are you telling me you've been fancying me too?"

"Oh shut up will you?" I snapped at him, "I'm not supposed to. I'm only leading myself up to heartbreak, and you a big round of beatings from Jake."

"If this is about what James said... I am not trying to get into your pants," Jungwon quickly stated and I just shook my head, rushing to move a bit away from him on the dock, "hey, that's not nice to do. Don't move away from me like that when we've both just confessed to our feelings!"

"Jungwon I don't care," I sighed at him, "I can't do this. I am not gonna fall for you and you need to sort out your feelings."

"Why?" he bluntly questioned and I just turned my head to look at him in disbelief.

"Why? Didn't you hear what I told you?" I questioned with a snort, "I am not setting myself up to a promised heartbreak."

"But you don't," he shook his head and I simply arched a brow at him, "you're not Jiyeon... in fact I think you're setting yourself up even more by trying to work against your feelings."

"As if I'm gonna believe that," I snorted and shook my head, "do you have any idea what people say about you?"

"I do," he hummed and gave me a small shrug, "doesn't mean they're true," he remarked and I hummed while he sucked in a deep breath, "I see how it looks, but I want you to trust me when I tell you they're not true," he reminded and I just gave him another hum, "how about... I give you a small kiss and you tell me if it feels right or not. If it feels right, I'm willing to just court you for some time until you make up your mind. If it feels wrong, too bad for me."

"You're insane," I shook my head as I looked back out over the water, "and I need to get home."

"No, wait," he urged and grabbed onto my elbow before I even got the chance to stand up, "let me give you a kiss and tell me if it feels wrong or right."

"Not a chance," I shook my head, "you're gonna run to your little ted friends and brag about it and I'll never get peace again."

"I'll tell people and risk getting beat up by your brother?" he snorted and looked at me in amusement as I slowly realized what he meant, making me look at him with raised eyebrows, "I'm serious, let me do it and if it's not right we can act like this never happened. I swear."

"Jungwon, why would you even fall for me?" I sighed at him, "you don't get anymore different than the two of us. I mean look at us for Christ sake!" I exclaimed only earning a small laugh from him.

"That's the funny thing, isn't it? You don't choose, it just happens," he casually shrugged before extending his palm towards me, "now, let me just... just one kiss."

I glanced over at him and his extended palm. Reluctantly I pulled my hand out of my pocket and laid it in his hand, having his warmth immediately engulf my cold hand as he moved closer to my side.

"You're gonna have to look at me," he reminded with a small smile, carefully turning my head with two fingers on my jaw, "otherwise your lips are awfully far away."

I hated the way he phrased it, it made a weird feeling bubble up in my stomach, and I hated he was the one that caused that feeling.

What I hated even more is when he carefully placed his lips on mine, how they were warm and soft and just felt so... perfect. I hated it, and maybe that's why I quickly had pulled away from him.

"What?" he murmured as a frown grew on my face and I pulled my hand from his grip to softly touch my lips, "it felt wrong, didn't it?" he questioned, a small hint of disappointment lacing his voice.

"I should go home," I murmured and quickly got up, rushing to walk off as I could hear Jungwon call out for me.