I've Loved These Days: A Billy Joel Fanfic

Chapter 29 - The River Of Dreams

••••
I've been searching for something
Taken out of my soul
Something I'd never lose
Something somebody stole
I don't know why I go walking at night
But now I'm tired
And I don't want to walk anymore
I hope it doesn't take the rest of my life
Until I find what it is
That I've been looking for
••••

Tuesday, December 12, 1978
Dear Diary,

John called today, and it was good to hear from him again and catch up. Ever since Mom's passing we've made it a point to keep in touch with each other. We've been speaking on the phone about once a month, and while I don't think we'll ever be super close, it's nice to have a connection with him again. Turns out he proposed to his girlfriend on Thanksgiving and she said yes, so that's certainly exciting for him. I only met his girlfriend briefly during the days around Mom's funeral, but she seemed very nice, and I'm very happy for both of them. On the other hand, towards the end of the conversation things took a turn I wasn't expecting and now I've got some things to think about...

xoxo,
Kat

****

"Have you guys picked a date yet?" I asked.

"I'm leaving those details up to Sarah's preference, but we're aiming for sometime next fall."

"Well congratulations, John! I'm really excited for you both." I switched the phone from one ear to the other as I changed positions on the couch. "I know I didn't meet her under the best circumstances, but Sarah seems like a really nice girl."

"Thanks, she really is." My brother took a deep breath and paused for a moment. "And speaking of those not so great circumstances... How would you feel about coming to Christmas dinner at Dad's?"

My eyes went wide. While I had made a point to keep in touch with John after losing our mom, I had done quite the opposite with my father. We hadn't seen or spoken to each other since the day of the funeral.

"I..."

"Listen," John's voice was suddenly serious, "you didn't hear this from me, but before Mom passed she made Dad promise to patch things up with you. I don't know if I should call it her dying wish, but she apparently had some choice words to say to Dad."

I blinked a few times trying to process that information. "John, I don't... I'm not sure..."

"I know you guys aren't ever gonna see eye to eye about everything, but Dad has changed a lot since losing Mom. He's softened up a bit."

"Does he want me there for Christmas? Or is this all your idea?"

"He wants you there," John replied. "He might not say it in those exact words, but he does. He's having a hard time dealing with the holidays without mom, and he's mentioned more than once that burying the hatchet with you would be the only Christmas gift he can give her anymore."

I took a deep breath and let it out slowly.

"Just think about it, Kathleen."

****

I bent down and peered inside the oven at the apple pie baking inside. My stomach was an unsettled ball of nerves.

"What else can I do to help?"

I turned to see Sandy tossing the last of the trash into the can. "Nothing. You shouldn't even be here. It's Christmas Day and you should be at home with Vince and Tiffany.

"I told you, my in-laws have been there since yesterday," Sandy shook her head wearily. "I've been up since 5AM, we've opened gifts, and Tiffany's now napping. Trust me, this is a much appreciated break."