I start to fall asleep as Hailee drives do her house. The hum of her engine puts my mind at ease. She's quietly humming lyrics to her songs that I recognize. She's tapping the rhythm on her steering wheel. Her phone starts to ring so I close my eyes and listen. "Hey baby." Hailee says. "Can I come over we have to talk." Ella says. "Uh I will have a friend over but yea sure, what's wrong." Hailee says concerned. "Nothing... I just want to talk about us." Ella says. "Oh okay talk to you later?" Hailee asks. "I will come another day. Bye." Ella says. "Bye Ella." Hailee says before she hangs up and then quietly whispers I love you. I just sit with my eyes closed and with my thoughts for the rest of the car ride. "y/n" Hailee says. "Wake up let's go eat dinner." She says. I rub my eyes and see her house, it's not huge but very modern.
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We head inside and I follow her into the kitchen. I plop down on one of the barstools. I look at at the 5'8" girl while my 6'0" self feels tall. "Do you like mac and cheese?" She asks. "Yea." I say and I look down at my phone. I see a text from Gia. Gia - y/n where are you? Your truck is still at your apartment but you're not here. I have a key remember! y/n - I went out with a friend I will be back later tonight Gia - OoOooOOo did you find a girl y/n - No Gia - You did! Have fun :) y/n - stfu
"Dinner is served." Hailee says in a funny accent. "Do you have an alcohol it's the only way I will talk freely without having up any walls." I say. "Yea sure what would you like." Hailee asks. "Anything but beer." I say. "Lucky for you I don't own any beer it sucks." Hailee says. She pulls out coca cola and rum and pours us both a glass. She hands me a glass and I down it in one gulp and I look at her face. She's shocked but she pours me some more. I totally forgot I shouldn't be mixing alcohol with my antidepressants but it's fine i've done it before. "So how old are you?" She asks. "22 and on my last year of college." I say. "Well I'm 23 and did not go to college." She says. "What's your major and what do you like to do on your free time." She asks. "I'm a Neuroscience major and I love to play soccer, go surfing and do martial arts." I say taking another sip of my drink and eat some of my mac and cheese. "So what I'm hearing is you're extremely athletic and if I ever needed to be saved you're the one to call." She says with a mouthful of mac and cheese. "Yup" I say popping the p. "So tell me anything, I will do first so obviously I am a singer, actor and musician. I really love to sing though." She says. I interrupt her really quickly. "I play the guitar." She smiles at me. "I just got a new role with Marvel, Hawkeye the show I am going to be playing Kate, since Dickinson just ended. Uh I think Ella wants to end things because she told me that we needed to talk." I frown "maybe she's gonna talk to you about going public." "If she really loved me she would've went public ages ago. She's never said it back too." Hailee says. "So my life wasn't all too great. I grew up in a small very religious family, I was expected to get great grades and be the perfect child and if I wasn't I was worthless and a disappointment. When they found out I was gay I got disowned I struggled with depression and anxiety and I still do. I left and got a full ride to UCLA for both soccer and merit and I haven't been back on the East coast since then and I don't plan to. I used all my savings for college to rent this small apartment a couple streets away from the campus. My truck is my baby. However I don't drive it much, haven't had the time. I usually run places and just walk. I am a people pleaser and I overthink everything. I'm also a hopeless romantic so I don't think I could ever get over or heal from Andy, I just miss her too much." "She'd want you to move on and be happy again." Hailee says. "When I'm happy everything goes wrong." I say. "When you truly find your happiness everyone will be happy with you." Hailee says. "Let's watch a movie, how's Black Widow?" "Perfect I could watch FloPugh any day." I say. We go sit on her couch and I sit on the opposite side from her and she motions at me to go sit with her. I comply with all the alcohol coursing through my body and she pulls me close to her and I snuggle into her side. I felt safe. We continued to talk for hours and she got to know me for who I really am and she didn't push me away like every other person has. She told me little things about herself no one knew and all I knew was Hailee is one person I want to keep in my life. "You're pretty tall for a soccer player, you'd make a good goalie" Hailee says giggling. "Nuh uh I am not that tall." I say. "You are just short." "Whatever you say... you're really funny when you're drunk." she says running her hands through my hair because I somehow ended up on her lap. "I'm not drunk I am tipsy." I say. "Drunk me is the life of the party." I say grabbing her hands. I stand up and she motions at me to come back. "Let's go write a song." I say smiling. "Now at 2 in the morning." Hailee says. "Yes. Do you have a guitar?" I ask. "Mhm follow me." Hailee says. I follow her into her studio and I sit down and strum on her guitar. I figure out the chords I want and I start to sing... (we're going to pretend that this song hasn't come out yet and Hailee wrote it with y/n) I clear my throat. "You made plans and I, I made problems We were sleeping back to back We know this thing wasn't built to last, yeah Good on paper, picture perfect Chased the high too far, too fast Picket white fence, but we paint it black Ooh, and I wished that you would hurt me harder than I hurt you Ooh, and I wish you wouldn't wait for me, but you always do"
"I've been hoping somebody loves you in the ways I couldn't" Hailee sang.
"Somebody's taking care of all of the mess I made Someone you don't have to change I've been hoping Someone will love you, let me go Someone will love you, let me go" I sang. "I've been hoping Someone will love you, let me go Spend some time, but this time ain't even I can leave it in the past But you're holding onto what you never had, it's Good on paper, picture perfect Chased the high too far, too fast Picket white fence, but we paint it black Ooh, and I wished that you would hurt me harder than I hurt you Ooh, and I wish you wouldn't wait for me, but you always do I've been hoping somebody loves you in the ways I couldn't Somebody's taking care of all of the mess I made Someone you don't have to change" Hailee sang. "I've been hoping Someone will love you, let me go Someone will love you, let me go I've been hoping Someone will love you, let me go, go, go Someone will love you, let me go, go, go Someone will love you, let me go, go, go Someone will love you, let me go, go, go Someone will love you, let me go" We sang together. "I've been hoping somebody loves you in the ways I couldn't Somebody's taking care of all of the mess I made Someone you don't have to change I've been hoping" Hailee sang. "Someone will love you, let me go" I sang strumming the guitar. "You didn't tell me you could sing." Hailee says. "You never asked." I say. "We are recording this now." Hailee says. We figure out all the line changes and how we want to harmonize and we sit in the booth. Hailee is sitting by my side and we record the song. By the end I am crying. Before Hailee ends the recording she says quietly it's going to all be okay. She wraps me in a hug and I just sob into her shoulder. She picks me up and we head to her room where she tucks me in her bed. She turns to go. "Hailee don't leave please." I say and she nods and snuggles up next to me. My breathing becomes shallow and I fall asleep.
