Ciel's Diary~ Ciel x Alois

Chapter 5

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This chapter was a little more... Awkward to write but lemme just say,
The feels. Get. Real.
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Yesterday me and Alois kissed, and I have to admit I liked it. I'm ashamed. If anyone were to know the head of the Phantomhives, the Queens Guard Dog were to be gay, our name would be smeared. Alois is coming over to discuss more business, and I believe we have to go into town at some point. Well I better stop writing, no need for another catastrophe now.
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Alois. Alois. Alois. I repeat in my head staring down at my bed.
"Young master, Earl Trancy has arrived." Sebastian informs.
"Present him in the kitchen, I will be down in a moment. Until then just serve him some tea or something."
"Indeed young master."
I stand up and walk to the mirror. Yikes! I'm a mess. I study my outfit in the mirror. My coat is crumpled, my bow is uneven, my hat is not in proper placing. I can't be presented like THIS! I adjust my hat, then I rub down my coat against the counter tops in attempt to straighten it, then I untie the bow and re tie it. That took longer than expected. Nearly 15 minutes.
I walk down the stares cautiously. Why do I feel so nervous?
"Cieeeeeeel! I see you got dressed all pretty for ME?" Alois grins.
"Shut it Trancy, let's get Down to business in my study." I say motioning him up the stairs, changing the topic.
"Phanomhime I KNOW you love meee" Alois giggles
"Maybe true Trancy." I say with a slight wink.
"Now master don't get Fiesty." Sebastian taunts.
By the time we reach the study I'm blushing.
"Oh Ciel, I'm awfully EXHAUSTED of paper work! Why don't we just take a break for once?" Alois complains.
"Then why the Hell did you come here if not for business?" I glare. God this kid is annoying.
"You invited me Phantomhive." Alois sasses.
"Indeed, I invited you strictly for work! Not for you to sit around like a little shit and complain!!!" I say sharply. Wow Sebastian was right... I do have a temper, it's only I shame I realize it after...
Alois begins to tear up. My face goes from a sharp angry expression to a more suddle pity one.
"I thought we could have some fun... I-I wanted you to have some fun for a change" Alois says between soft sobs.
"What, you wanted to have sex with me? Is that what you mean FUN?" I get sharp again. I don't take sad eyes.
"If you have to think perverted then FINE!!" Alois runs out the room into and slams the door. He runs into what I assume is the bathroom from the direction he went. I hear a click and a lock from a small distance. Yep it was the bathroom. I might as well get some work done while that sexy ass pulls himself together.
Suddenly a ting of guilt sinks me, and I get hot, then cringe.
Alois POV:
I giggle silently to myself. Finally! My plan, well Claude's plan worked! He thinks I went to the bathroom to sob, but nope, I came into his room to look or his diary... I know he has one. I begin ravaging through his cabinets as quietly as possible. I check his wardrobe, his closet, his bed covers, then I spot one small wooden beside table with a small cupboard underneath.
"Bingo" I say devilishly.
I open it and there it was! An indigo blue book that in lighter blue writing says "Journal" diary, journal, same thing. I assume. I brush through all the pages imagining all the secrets flowing in front me on every paper. I go to the very last page that has been written on.
'I wonder what he wrote yesterday..." I say with an uncontrollable grin.
'Yesterday me and Alois kissed, and I have to admit I liked it. I'm ashamed. If anyone were to know the head of the Phantomhives, the Queens Guard Dog were to be gay, our name would be smeared. Alois is coming over to discuss more business, and I believe we have to go into town at some point. Well I better stop writing, no need for another catastrophe now.'
WOAH. He likes me!! He really... Likes me. Tears form in my eyes and I don't attempt to keep them from falling. They stream down my face and I sob quietly with tears of joy.
"I can't... Believe... All th-...is time I... Thought nobody car-..... ed.... He did." I manage to choke out. He loves me. He really does. I continue to sob without any thought of how long I could be.
Ciel's POV:
It's been nearly 20 minutes. Surely it doesn't take this long to get over a swear. I get up sighing and open the study door to see... The bathroom door open... And MY BEDROOM door closed. WHAT THE FUCK? I run across the hallway quicker then ever. I grab my room door handle infuriated with rage. My teeth grit together..
"OPEN THE GODDAM DOOR TRANCY!"
"You care... You-.... care" Alois says sobbing. Oh shit! He read it!
"FUCKING TRANCY IF YOU DO NOT OPEN THE DOOR THIS INSTANCE I SWEAR I WILL KILL YOU!"
"I love you Ciel." He says softly. I'm the darkest red I have ever been.
"TRANCY. I DONT LOVE YOU! I NEVER WILL LOVE YOU YOU FUCKING BASTARD!!!"
I hear a gasp from him.
"Why..? Why- couldnt- you just have-... Lied???......." Pitch silence apart from his sobs occurred.
"WHY COULDNT YOU HAVE LIED TO ME?!? I KNOW NOBODY LOVES ME! I WAS FOOLISH FOR THINKING THIS. IM SORRY! SORR-Y-Y-YYY.." The sound fades as he slams his face into my pillows sobbing more loudly than I could have ever imagined. What have I done? I turn around leaning on the door, slide down so that my knees are pressed to my chests, and I sit there with my head buried in my arms In this position.
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4 hours have passed by now. I can still hear the loud sobs of Alois coming from the room. I feel so much guilt. More guilt than even anger. Because the truth is... I do love him, so why did I say I didn't??? Why? When it was true.
"Alois." The first word has been spoken since hours ago.
"You-r st-I-...ll- here..?" Alois says with a voice so strained I could barely make out what he just said.
"I Havnt left this spot."
....
"Please open the door."
....
"Please."
....
He doesn't respond for about 10 minutes and that when I finally say....
"I love you Alois."
I hear no response but I can hear his footsteps come towards the door and he unlocks it.
"It's alright. It's nice when you lie Ciel." I look up to see the door open and Alois face and clothes are a mess. He is pale and soaked in tears.
"I'm not lying" I say.
"Thanks. I appreciate it." More tears form and fall from his eyes as if he thinks someone "lying" that they love him is the best thing he's ever heard, I stand up and hug him. He hugs me back. Then we kiss.
"I'm not lying." I say. And I mean it.
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YAY, chapter done! And goddamit there's school tomorrow :c ayyy and look at the time! I gtg to bed! So IMMA publish then go to bed, so goodnight and I hope you enjoyed the chapter!
Ps. Diana, I hate you for making me write this.
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