Love me do || C. Madrigal

Start Over

You shake your head sullenly, not wanting to talk. It was embarrassing, the nights you spent thinking of him like a lovesick schoolgirl. But he was here now, and it made you wonder what possessed you not to seek him out sooner. You felt so safe amd warm in his arms.

Camilo gently rubs your back, swaying the two of you back and forth. He doesn't talk, but his touch was enough to comfort you. The gesture made you feel homesick, reminiscing to the times when he would escape his duties just to lie with you.

"Have you been eating well? y/n?"

The silence draws on horribly long, and the male seems to realize your answer with a sigh. Camilo gently brushes his fingers against your cheek, a slight frown forming as he feels how gaunt you had become.

"sleeping?"

"..."

You dont reply- more like you cant bring yourself to with the crestfallen expression Camilo wore. His brows were furrowed as he gently stroked your hair, lightly scolding you.

"Amor-" He hurriedly caught himself, clearing his throat. "Y/n, please, you have to take care of yourself-"

"hypocrite." you cant stop the venom that leeches onto your voice. at your tone the male physically recoils. "you havent been sleeping either."

he sighed exasperatedly, running a hand through his hair. the guilt immediately bubbled in your stomach and your eyes softened, darting elsewhere as you muttered a barely audible apology lost to the wind.

"dont try to make this about me now when you know damn well-"

its your turn to shrink, his words biting into you and squeezing at your chest. you hated this feeling, the sudden joy before the sadness returns without any remorse. Camilo scowled, more to himself than to you, looking away.

again, there was nothing but the wind that filled the silence and the soft chattering of the townspeople from the bustling marketplace. you hang your head in defeat and you choked out your own heart wrenching verdict.

"maybe we werent meant to be."

the words felt like a thorn in your throat, painfully scratching against it as you spat it out. it hurt, everything hurt, your mind was spinning, your body tired and your heart nervously pounding in your chest.

camilo drew a shaky breath,  disagreeing adamantly.

"you dont know that-"

"camilo; look at us!" you gestured between the two of you. it was almost laughable. when you two had been together, it was almost as if you were glowing. you had built yourselves up in the most beautiful way and tore yourselves down nearly as easily.

hes at a loss for words and you take that as a sign to scurry away, clutching all of your valuables close to your chest. it hurt that he didnt follow, that he didnt chase after you. but you wave the feeling off, cursing yourself instead for leaving him there, in the meadows hurting.

at your untimely arrival, your mother scolded you for taking so long. but you dont listen numbly nodding instead- much like you always do. your mind was so stuffy, so full of words you meant to say but never could.

you room seems to await your presence, seeming brighter and more cozy than before. trudging inside you colaspe tiredly onto the bed, feeling like nothing more than a pile of bones with a heavy heart.

eventually you had ended up spending your day starting blankly at the wall, your dinner left untouched. it mustve been late into the night when you heard a tap by your window. at first you thought it was the wind- you thought you had gone so crazy you started hearing things.

but then you heard it again. that gentle tap. you waited in bated breath for it to happen again and it did. the noise had chilled you, left you frozen stiff on your bed. it wasnt long before you window opened.

The stout man entered nimbly with ease. his unrecognizable voice muttering.

"dios mio, do you know how dangerous it is to keep the window open? you're lucky its just me."

you stuttered in response backing against the wall and staring at the intruder with wide eyes. until in the silver light of the blue moon he shifted. ever so slightly getting shorter, hair becoming that same poofy shape you remembered.

just like that he was there, smiling crookedly as if you two had never fought. just like before, when everything was fine. when everything was okay. your heart ached and you gave in. Who cares about pride when you could have camilo? and so for tonight you decided you'd forgive him; forgive yourself.

"i missed you-" the male didnt even get to finish when you enveloped him in a hug, breathing in his familiar scent. "oof..! didnt think you'd welcome me so readily mi amor."

you smiled at the nickname, nestling into him. his hands made its way to your waist, then to your back. as if he couldnt believe that you were really there there with him.

for awhile the two of you just stood there, lost in each others embrace. there was so much you meant to say, but you were afraid of the fight that might blossom inspite of whatever you choose to speak.

camilo didnt mind. he was content with holding you for now. his eyes darted around your once organized and decorated room, now empty and lifeless. it made him grimace; even more so when his eyes took noticed of the forgotten dinner at your bedside.

"have you eaten?"

his question was greeted with your silence and he gently toyed with your hair, pulling you close as he muttered.

"y/n, you have to eat.. please?" his voice nearly desperate. the male led you over to your bed, having to pry away your reluctant arms. he picked up the platter of food, taking a spoon full and pointing it towards you with a cheeky grin. "say ahhhh"

you cant stop the giggle that escapes you and he too chuckles. the spoon remained pointed on you until you decide to bite into it chewing with a small pout on your lips. camilo of course took notice, taking the opportunity to tease you.

"you look so adorable hermosa~"

his words made you blush- the feeling almost foreign. you watch with curiosity as he puts the plate down, turning to look at you and holding your hands, his eyes solemnly staring into yours.

"i love you."

your heart soared but you nervously paled. camilo was getting ready to say more; making you expect that small "but" to leave you sulking for the rest of your days.

"mi angelita, i love you so much- in ways words cant even begin to express, but we arent working out."

the male seemed to have anticipate your reaction, placing a hand onto your cheek to keep you facing him.

"we should start over"