The Lonely Girl

Chapter 32: waiting

Derek p.o.v

Numbness, that's all I could feel. 

Actually, I couldn't feel anything. That's the whole point of being numb. 

I couldn't speak, I couldn't hear, I couldn't sleep, I couldn't eat, I couldn't do anything other than just stare in the abyss. Stare into a lifeless future. 

Nothing would be the same without Rose. Life would lose its sparkle without her. 

I was losing her. I couldn't lose her. I could not lose her! 

The moment I felt that I could possibly lose her, it was right then, right at that moment I knew. I was in love with Rose Villin. 

The way I felt about Rose was never near the way I felt about Olivia. 

I think I stopped myself from falling in love with her because I knew Rose wouldn't be ready for any of that kind of stuff. 

Rose needed stability, to figure out her way in life, finding her path to walk on. 

She needed to start up her life and with that, she couldn't and shouldn't figure out romantic feelings of any kind. 

And deep down I knew that and I think that's why I never let myself fall in love with that little girl. 

I didn't know how I got back on the couch because the last thing I remembered was falling on my knees. 

People were talking to me, but I couldn't understand them. Their voices sounded muffled. It was like I was surrounded by thick glass. I could still see them, but not hear them. 

I wanted to escape, escape from this nightmare. 

I wanted to hide myself in the darkest hole I could find and stay there until everything was better, until everything was fine. 

Nathan was right. 

I did this. All of this was my fault. I am the one to blame for this mess. 

I should have never asked Olivia on a date. I should have never even let her step one foot in my house. 

I should have done things differently, I should have...I should have...

Then I blacked out. 

Nathan p.o.v

We had to put Nathan on the couch as he just sat there lifeless on his knees on the ground. He looked defeated and like he had aged years within a couple of seconds. 

With a loud thud, he fell on the couch. 

He was out of it. 

"Derek?" I touched his shoulder hoping he would react. 

"Derek? Come on man, talk to me." He kept on looking at the ground. Derek's eyes were dull. He blinked slowly almost in slow-motion. 

I got worried. 

I think he was trying to find a place in the back of his head so he didn't need to deal with his emotions and feelings on the matter at hand. 

I could understand his response, but I couldn't let him act this way. 

He needed to get his shit together in case Rose would wake up. He couldn't think as if everything was already over. 

Nothing was for sure now. The doctor was right, all we could do was hope. And hoped I did. I hoped so badly Rose would fight. I hoped she would wake up. I hoped that in the end the six of us would be happy in one way or another. 

We waited in the hospital room, consoling each other, waiting for nothing and everything at the same time. 

After an hour a nurse had said one of us could visit Rose for a couple of minutes. Immediately I turned to Derek. 

I nudged him. 

Derek didn't respond either this time. I tried to get anything out of him, but it was useless. 

I looked around the room. Asking silently who wanted to go. "Maybe you should go, Nathan." 

As much as I wanted to I didn't know if I was strong enough to see her there laying on a bed surrounded by medical equipment. 

I looked at the nurse, "Can two people come?" 

She was hesitant in her answer but gave permission anyway. I asked if Max wanted to go. I needed him. I needed his support. 

"Of course," He whispered. 

Holding hands we followed the nurse to the ICU. We walked past the other patients on the ICU and they all looked horrible like they were all either fighting for their life or life clinging on to them. 

Then the nurse stopped and let us in the room where Rose ley in. 

I was shocked when I saw her. Her head was wrapped up, tubes were going in and out of her body, beeping machines surrounding her. And she...she looked so small. 

Why would anyone ever hurt such a kind soul like Rose?

I couldn't help it as tears escaped from my eyes.

Carefully we walked up to her. Max standing next to me as I stood next to Rose's bed. I wished magic was real and could fix all of this. I wished miracles and wonders were real. I wished for so many things right then. 

After five minutes the nurse came back to get us.

It was hard for me to move my eyes away from her, afraid something might happen if we leave her side. As if we have given up on her. 

I moved with the greatest care forward and gave Rose a forehead kiss and whispered, "You are not alone Rose. We are all waiting for you. We will wait for you." 

It was difficult saying goodbye, but I kept telling myself this wouldn't be a final goodbye. 

We took Derek to his house and we decided to stay all there until the five days were up. The house was big enough and we didn't want to leave Derek alone. Even though we also didn't want to be close to him. 

Ellis was very angry at him, but she never really showed her rage towards him as Rose was always in her best interest. She didn't want to complicate things even further. 

But now as she was laying in a hospital bed far away from us she had no problem showing her fuming rage. 

It didn't matter though, Derek lived as a shell. 

Stella and I actually had to care for him. She made sure he ate, I made sure he would go to bed. The rest was up to him. 

He had nightmares. I could hear him. I didn't sleep well too, so I could hear the screams echoing through the hallways and corridors of the house. 

Five horrible days went by where we all made sure everybody went on with their normal lives, school, work, doing some fun activities. Especially for Anna and Max. They had sadly, like Rose, a little side that was a result of trauma. 

Therefore, we knew they would fall into their little spaces soon to be able to cope with everything that was happening.   

When the five days were over we all went to the hospital, again waiting on the little girl that was fighting for her life. 

Unfortunately, after the doctors tried to wake her, she didn't. Rose stayed asleep. She stayed hooked up on so many machines, but the most important thing was, according to the doctors, that she was stable now for two whole days and that her condition hadn't worsened.

But I couldn't help but think that all hope might be gone as we started on our wait again. 

A/N: I hope you all aren't mad at me, hehe. 

Please let me know what you think. 

What do you think will happen to Rose?

If you want to read ahead you can on my Patreon, chapters 33 and 34 are out on there. I hope to finish chapter 35 this weekend too. (See link bio, or use my username Little Rose)

Thank you for reading and have a nice day!