Crossing the gangster

Chapter 18

Chris's POV

I was fucking losing my mind, or I had lost it already. At this point, I didn't tell the difference between the two.

I no longer had the control I once did over my thoughts, something I deeply prided in. It was like slowly but surely that control was cracking, becoming worse and worse each day as my mind filled itself with thoughts I wished I could banish.

Like how hot Hazel had looked in that swimsuit and how I had to struggle against the urge to pin her against the wall and take her right then and there. Then again in that black dress on the second mission that did wonders to her body and crazy things to my heart.

When she and Blake proclaimed her relationship, I felt like my heart had dropped off a cliff, a sinking feeling in my pit that was indescribable.
After that came anger, anger that needed a victim and that victim was Hazel. It was her fault I was such a mess because before she entered my life, I was the most put together person I knew. And now, now I can't even talk to her for ten minutes before my eyes drifted to her lips, those kissable, soft lips.

I shook my head at my fucking whipped thoughts because I did NOT like her, it was just a mere pull of attraction that would wear off in due time. So maybe it was a good thing she was dating someone important to me because I would never betray Blake and I knew she was in good hands, she would be protected from hurt.

He liked her and she liked him so I should be happy for them. So why the fuck was I not?

As I was walking towards the front door to lock it for the night, slightly confused as to why I hadn't seen her today. Granted, I was trying to avoid her so maybe she was resting in her room.
The minute I got to the door, I was slightly surprised with the soft tapping I heard, someone trying to push it open but struggling to do so. I peered through the peep hole to see a startling sight, quickly throwing open the door for Hazel to stumble in, trails of blood on the floor behind her as she struggled to stay awake.

She collapsed into my arms, her eyes shuttered close and I gathered her closer to me,  My heart was pounding against my ribcage as I looked down upon her weak and fainted figure, the life draining out of her slowly, something undeniably painful to watch as I stood there helpless.

Once I regained my senses, I picked her up bridal style, fighting off the shiver that ran down my body at her closeness to me. Now wasn't the time to be affected by her presence...
I flew down the hall and the stairs, taking it two at a time as I barged into the medical room, yelling for the nurse as I placed her down onto the hospital bed. My hands were tainted a scarlet red, rivulets of her blood dripping down my hand and onto the floor.

What had happened to her? Did she get attacked by the rival gangs? Fear gripped me in a tight hold, something I hadn't felt for a long time as I gazed down at her still body. The only relief was the soft and slow pounding of her heart, showing me that I hadn't lost her to the selfish hands of death.

Gripping my hair tightly, I sat down in a chair outside of the room as the nurses began to do everything they can, my foot tapping against the floor impatiently. There was no doubt that I was furious, what was she thinking walking alone at night?

Did she think she was some superhero that could fend off everyone on her own? Did she think about the number of people who cared about her and would be affected if she got
hurt? Did she think at all about herself?

My jaw clenched in frustration and I got up from my seat, storming off. I informed Blake, who despite looking slightly panicked, nodded and rushed off to inform the other two friends of hers.

I didn't care for Hazel at all, I forced myself to think, ignoring the twisting of my gut that told me otherwise. I needn't be there to see her when she woke up...

I made my way to the fighting room, desperately needing to let off some steam as I pulled my shirt over my head. A torrent of mixed emotions were running through me right now; anger, helplessness, fear.

I shook my head, putting on punching gloves and punching the shit out of the bag in front of me though it did nothing to remove her thoughts from my head, something that surrounded and threatened to overwhelm me.

Her intoxicating, sweet smell of peaches, her luscious hair that I wanted to run my hands through, no stop it, I growled at myself as I punched harder and harder.

Why was it that she crowded my mind when I knew I was scarce in hers?

The ringing of the phone cut me out of my thoughts as I stopped punching, holding my hand up so the punching bag didn't swing back and hit me in the face.

"Boss, there was a fight break out in the alley near your house, that possibly could be related to her. They have been stalking her for a while because they took advantage of our blind spot that we have for our  activities and attacked her there. They were all masked as well but from the audio, it is obvious that she knows of them and most likely, has met the leader before."

Upon hearing that, I threw my phone against the wall in frustration. They used our blind spot? How did they even know about that precise location, something that
even the government wasn't aware of.

I ran my hand through my hair, a nervous habit of mine that I did too frequently to be good. I rushed back down to the hospital room where Blake was inside with her and Izzy and Noah waited outside. She was up now, tiredness visible in her features as she and her boyfriend conversed softly.

I felt a pang of jealousy as I stared at them, hating myself for doing so. But now wasn't the time for this, it was the time to get answers from her. Her fear stricken face was still imprinted in my memory as I first saw her and I subconsciously knew her mind was tainted by this despicable man, whoever he was.

But as I watched her with a soft smile on her lips, relaxed and calm, something stopped me from ruining that air of peace that hung around her. I didn't want to be the reason her mind had to suffer in pain.

Tomorrow, I promised myself, turning on my heel and walking back up though my eye mommentarily caught hers before I did such. Gratitude was written in them, gratitude I didn't deserve and didn't want. It only made my necessary interrogation so much harder...

TBC

I'm sorry this is slightly short because chris is an extremely complex character and hides his thoughts and emotions extremely well. This was kind of just briefly touching his thoughts but you will get to know him better later on, hopefully.

Just know he isn't as cruel as I sometimes portray him to be and he has his own demons haunting him :(

Would you like another chris's POV chapter later on in this story?

Have you ever thought about how he feels on a daily basis?

Do you ship chris and hazel at all?

Do vote and comment ✨💝