CARMEN THINKING - THE SOUND INSIDE A SEASHELL PART 1

MY OTHER NORMAL

August 26, 2014

I drift out and far away to get closer to you

I leave in order, to stay forever

I walk on moons and think of you

I touch stars and forget myself

I let you go, I float away from everyone

a

million

times

a

day

and

it is because I love so deeply

it is because I love so much more

here in a place between the real and not so real

here as I float between different worlds and times zones

and I see my future

I wish you could see

I only see us

I only see you

but

sometimes I just want to spend a little part of right now

alone

with myself

my music

my words

without judgment

or pressure

or questions

I drift out and far away

sometimes

because sometimes normal air is hard to breath and normal me is hard to be...

BEING A DISAPPOINTMENT

August 27, 2014

disappointed yes I understand that feeling

but being a disappointment

that

that feeling is new...

I am the failure

I am the dead end

I am empty pot at the end of the rainbow

it hurts to be the source of your hurt

it hurts to be the one who was thoughtless

I always think before I act

how could I be so careless

how could I be so foolish

how could I be so childish

it hurts to surprise in a way that's not pleasant

it hurts to know that I have betrayed your trust

I am the lost receipt

I am the forgotten birthday

I am the inappropriate joke made at a funeral

I

am

so

wrong

WHAT IS MINE AND MINE AND MINE AND MINE AND MINE ALL OVER AND OVER AND OVER AGAIN

August 29, 2014

my

affection

my

anger

my