His Personal Queen (An Islamic Novel- Nigeria)

29

Asiya's POV

Devastated was an understatement to what i felt. I felt betrayed, unwanted, unloved, angry at the world, i felt like my whole world had come to a halt, as if nothing was working again. Deep down i had this fear, but i refused to let it overwhelm me after all Khalid kept on reassuring me. I felt cheated honestly, like everyone turned their back against me for a single crime as they'd call it. Maybe it is indeed my fault, maybe if i didn't let my fear and trauma overshadow me we wouldn't have come to this place. Maybe if i had just put all that had happened before in the past behind me, this wouldn't have happened.
If my baby had survived then, would he have ended up here? Would i have lived with the fear and trauma of losing another child and let it stop me from trying for another one? Is a child the only purpose of marriage?

———

Tears were streaming down my cheeks, I couldn't control them. I sat up on the couch i was laying on after passing out. I started at Khalid and he did the same. I couldn't believe he had done that to me. I then got up and headed to the bathroom without saying a word to him, all he did was call out my name softly but I didn't reply. I washed my face 5 times and stared at my weak self in the mirror. I came out walking sluggishly towards Khalid standing on the same spot i had left him.

'You promised me, you assured me, you told me all would be alright, that you'd take care of everything and calm Baba down, what changed huh?' I said really softly because I didn't have the energy anymore.

'Asiya please sit down i need you to listen to what i have to say please, i am as hurt as you are and believe me when i tell you I totally understand what you're going through. Sit let's talk plea—,' I cut him off as i looked away.

'Save it! I don't want to hear it. All I know is you betrayed my trust, you broke your promise to me, and decided to go behind my back and get married again!!!!!' I stomped my foot on the floor and grunted angrily. Sweat was coming down my forehead, i was very angry.

'You know what? I should have seen the signs earlier but i was too blind by the love i thought i had for you,'

'Asiya please stop saying things like this, you're really hurting my feelings,' he said as he tried to hold my hands in his but I retreated and hissed.

'Oh really? What about my own feelings that you hurt? Or is that going under the radar? The trust and promise you broke? I see you're the only one with feelings Mr Khalid Bande! Tsk!!,' i was really boiling. I didn't want to be anywhere around him, i just wanted to go away somewhere where I'd be alone.

'In fact, who is the woman that confused you so much? Who is the idiot?' I yelled at him.

'Asiya please believe me when i say i do not know her, all i know is she is Baba's friend's daughter. Mama said something about sending me her picture,' he said.

I then sat back on the couch staring at him. 'Since when did you start lying to me? How can you tell me you do not know her and expect me to believe you?' I asked in a defeated voice. Just as his mouth opened to say something his phone chimed and he rummaged through his pocket to get it. Seconds later as if after seeing what the message was, i saw his mouth remain wide open, he looked in shock, he almost lost his balance, he then began to muttered an Innalillahi wa'inna ilahi raji'un'.

'It's th-the g-girl's p-p-picture,' he stuttered. I got up and snatched the phone from his hand to see who it was.

Immediately i saw the picture, i felt my life came to a standstill, i felt even more cheated than before, i felt like Khalid and his father had just played with my feelings and it felt so unfair. Tears i fought back streamed down, my head began to ache so badly, my chest felt so tight...this can't be.