die for you || harry styles fanfic

chapter 3.

AMBER'S POV

"ashton?"

"it's been a long time huh?" his thick australian accent filling my ears. "you've lost alot of weight, I remember that time when I can't even hug you fully" he started gigling. I just shrugged.

"what are you doing here?" I questioned coldly

"I've been living here for 3 months, amber" i said while trying to hold her arms

"don't you dare fucking touch me after what you did! we may be in a total different place but what you done is totally unforgivable" I said through gritted teeth.

"amber, come one just leave it in the past! why can't you just move on?"

"move on? how could I fucking move on ashton irwin? just go fuck yourself!" I yelled. I pushed him away and tried running back home but I felt his fingers wrapped around my wrist.

"amber you don't even know the way back home don't you?" he questioned. I just kept quiet. He sighed.

"come on I'll walk you home, anyways im your neighbour"

"You're my neighbour?" i questioned angrily. wow couldn't this day get any better

"yes, now let's go" he said with his fingers still wrapped around my wrist. I trailed behind him and my mind remembered that curly haired boy. I eyed ashton's outfit and I felt relieved that he's not wearing red flannel and black skinny jeans.

"you know, you can let go"

"I know, but I prefer not to" he said cheekily. I just rolled my eyes. gosh I hate him.

***

"amber! where have you been? are you insane? why did you just left like that?" my mom yelled.

I just keep my eyes glued to the floor like it's the most interesting thing I've ever seen.

"look at me when I'm talking to you!" she yelled again. My eyes drifted from the floor to her eyes.

"I'm sorry" I mumbled

"I can't believe it Amber! we just moved here and this is how you treat your aunt and uncle? and how you treat your mom?"

I look back at floor and stared at my shoes. I brought my lower lip between my teeth. I was basically trying so damn hard not to cry.

"now go back to your room" I nodded and ran up instead of walking up. I barge into my room and closed the door shut. I press my back against the door and slide down. I burry my head in my knees as I cried and cried.

I hate my life! out of everybody in this world why me? I was trying to run away from my past and this fucking ashton is here!

I cried harder at the thought of what he did to me in the past. I can't believe I'm gonna do this again but I have to. I walk over to my luggage and opened it. I found my small bag where my toiletries are there. I rummage through my small bag and found what I was looking for. my razor.

I unzipped my jeans and pulled it down. I looked down at my bare thighs. I closed my eyes as I brought the razor to my thighs. The way it cut my skin open makes me smile. I slice 3 to 4 times until I'm satisfied then I put the razor down. I opened my eyes and the sight of my cuts made me smile. I feel safe with them.

The skin around my cuts starts to be red and puffy. Then blood starts to come out. My heart beat sped up when I saw the blood coming out but at the same time I feel happy. I start to feel dizzy but I won't faint here. So I force myself to keep my eyes open. I grab my towel from my bag and start to press it hard against my cuts. I felt embarrassed of myself. I broke my promise. I remembered last time I promised myself not to do this anymore. I groan in pain and sat still. I didn't know what I was in anymore. I then drift off to sleep.

****

okay so basically ashton used to live in australia and went to the same school as amber but he moved to uk three months before amber. so yeah, amber will be meeting harry at the next chapter I promise. love youu

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