Start of the letter - 6

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AVEN

"No. I won't do it. That's stupid." I try to convince Maya that this is the stupidest idea possible but she's not having any of it.

"Come on! It's not stupid. Trust me." She try's to convince me.

"No," I say, never changing my answer.

Maya gets up and I'm about to let out a sigh of relief when she roughly grabs my arm, attempting to pull me up.

Immediately I'm up out of my seat, practically ripping her hand from my arm. I back away from her in horror.

Flashbacks from a year ago run through my mind, sending me into a silent panic.

Alex is getting out of his seat, telling Maya how she shouldn't have done that but I can barely hear what he's saying with the panic running through my body.

I lean against the wall while two hands land on my shoulders. With my gaze fixed on Maya, I don't register Elliot right in front of me trying to calm me down.

I move my eyes to look at him and the concerned look etched onto his face.

"Hey, look at me. Breathe." He takes deep breaths instructing me to follow his lead.

"Good. You're doing so good." He says. He wipes the tears that are falling from my eyes.

Subconsciously, I wrap my arms around his neck, burying my face in the crook of his shoulder while small sobs threaten to break from my throat.

He doesn't complain, wrapping his arms tightly around me.

It's not necessarily Maya's fault this is happening, maybe it's my own. I just hate that it's happening at all.

I've never realized how much that one action could send me into such a panic until now. You would think I'd be over it. I Wish I was over it. But I'm not because it doesn't work that way.

The policemen that ever so kindly escorted me out of my old school treated me like I was an object they were moving onto a shelf, giving no care that their actions physically hurt me.

I pull away from Elliot's embrace while wiping the tears from my face. "Sorry" I laugh out an unhumorous laugh. "that's really embarrassing."

"It's not embarrassing. What happened?" Elliot asks.

I shake my head violently. I'm about to brush off his question but Alex speaks before me.

"Just something." He says blandly. He knows as I do.

Elliot furrows his brows, looking in between me and Alex. "Just...something?"

The bell rings before anyone can say anything else.

"Yup," I say, then I quickly walk out the cafeteria doors.

•••

I'm sitting in my seventh-period class trying to pay attention to the lesson the teacher is presenting on the board in front of us.

Normally, the task is easy, but right now it's not because Elliot has been poking his pencil into my back, trying to pry answers from me since he's sat down directly behind me

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