Crying,
Everything hurts,
Was i not good enough.
No.
Everything else just collapsed in on us.
But we're not an us anymore are we.
You're just you and I am just me.
When I think of you it hurts.
When I dream of you I cry.
When I reach out for you,
You aren't even there.
I am scared.
I am lonely.
I was fine when you were with me,
But now I am lost.
Now I am gone.
I had plans.
I chose you.
I wanted there to be an us.
I still do.
But it hurts to much to know you could find someone else.
Why do I even write.
Why do I keep living.
Why do they always leave.
Why can't I leave.
I know I said those words but you told me to.
We couldn't say them but,
We had to.
I had to.
I miss you.
I miss everything.
I cry till my tears dry.
I still don't get why I am here.
I think of ending everything sometimes.
I think of running down and taking everything away.
Dying.
But I can't bring myself to.
I guess I am just weak.
Or I just can't continue with out saying goodbye.
Life throws bricks at us but I will always still be there.
Till I am not.
I wish that someone would just stay with me.
Hold out and tell me everything isn't ok.
Because it really isn't.
I write because this is what I love doing.
But I also write to cry,
To share my feelings with others,
To say I am here too,
To say I want to be helped too.
I want to be there.
I want to stop crying.
I'll ride out my feelings,
Close them and lock them in a box.
Just so you won't see me cry or hurt.
So I can be strong and no one will know.
So I can hide the fact I am completely dead inside and broken.
