Love killed life.

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What if we died tomorrow?
What would you do?
Would you have stayed with me?
Would you have still left me?
What if you find someone better then me?
What happens to me then?
Would you let me go like all the others?
Or would you keep me?
Do you really want to be friends for 4 years?
Do you really want to wait?
Honestly do you even want to talk with me?
Because I know that it's hard for me to talk to you.
I cry every time you text me now.
But you don't even text me.
I get it though, we both need some space right now.
But what if in the time you found someone better then me, closer to you, nicer to you, loves you more?
Would you still want me?
I wish I could tell what you're thinking right now.
At least then I would know if I could stay or leave.
I wish you would read this.
I wish you were still messaging me.
I wish you were here.
I don't care about anything else.
I just need you.
I just want to cry with you.
But you left.
Cause everything else was to much.
I had to leave too but I still need you.
I still really need you.
I wish you don't walk away.
If you do, I would break in two.
I would throw away anything I had.
I would run, cry, hide, hurt, never be the same, if you left.
I know you said goodbye to our relationship and said hello to another one.
I still love you.
And I will wait for you no matter what.
Nothing and no one will take me away from you, except you.
When you don't want or need me, then I know I should just leave.
I want to plan a life with you, but do you even want to do that?
I feel like I am breaking.
Falling.
I just need to know if you still love me.
I just really need to know if we are going to wait 4 years.
I just want to be there for you.
But would you even want me to.
My feeds are filled up with sad thoughts.
My mind is filled with terrible thoughts.
I just wish you were still here talking to me so they could go away.
Even for just a second.
Honestly I don't even care about anything anymore.
I want to just give up everyday.
There's no one really there that I feel like I can talk to.
I don't need help.
I don't need anything.
I just really wish you were still here.
I hurt myself a little more everyday.
I cry a little more every hour.
I wanted to cry in all my classes but I can't.
I can't show that something's going on.
Cause nothing is really going on.
You're still here.
You just need the space.
I just need to give it back to you.
I will wait.
I am waiting.
No matter how many years or what anyone else thinks,
I love you.
Nothing and no one will change that.

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