Save Me From Myself (sequel to "My Neighbor")

Chapter 9

Chapter 9| Aurora
"I love you"
"I love you too" I whisper and give Zander a kiss on the cheek.
I lay on top of him as I rest my head on his chest. "I want food!" I say making Zander give me the bowl of popcorn.

We start watching the movie as he cuddles me and gives me kisses on my forehead. "You're perfect" he says. I look up and smile.

He smiles back "You're the first person i've ever loved" he says "What do you mean? You've dated plenty of girls i'm pretty sure you loved one of them more than anything" I say

"Just cause I dated them doesn't mean I loved them. It was just an attraction to them I guess, but it wasn't love at all. at least, compared to what i feel towards you" He says.

He takes out his phone and starts texting someone. I don't mind and keep on watching the movie. After like 10 minutes of Zander being on his phone I decided to get up and walk to my dad's room.

He's sleeping peacefully so I sit down on his bed and look at him. I see him breathing which gives me relief and calms me down.

He starts to move and wakes up. He sees me and starts to freak out. I grab his arm and make him look at me directly into the eye.

"Dad, I know you've been having a hard time and think i'm dead but i'm really not! It's been so hard to see you like this! Listen to me I'm not dead! I'm perfectly alive and there's nothing to worry about!" I say.

"G-g-get out!! Get out!" He yells. I hold onto his wrist and make him touch my face. I move his hand onto my cheek and forehead. "Can you feel this? Can you feel my skin?!" I yell.

"Y-y" he starts to mumble as he starts touching my arm and my hand. He places my hand onto his face. He stares at me and starts to tear up.

"No, dad don't cry please" I say. He hugs me and I hug him back hard. He lets out a sob "Why am I so blind?!" dad says and he rubs my back.

"It's okay dad" I say "No! I've been such a mess believing myself instead of what was right in front of me!" he says

"I really missed you dad, without you it's been so hard I, I killed Jackson and, It's just so hard I don't know what to do anymore!" I yell.

"It's okay, I'm here now, I may get a little crazy on you but remember I do believe you and I know you're still here, I'm just glad I can keep you a little longer before your mom takes you with her" Dad says. I nod and take a deep breath.

"I miss mom" I say. "I do too sweetie, It's normal, I know it's been a while, but I can't stop thinking about her at night, I just want someone to hold at during the night" He says.

"I'd tell you to go find a new woman, but I don't think anyone could ever replace mom. No one" I say

"I know, I don't want someone else I just want your mother. There will be a day when we'll see her again, right now she can only see us. For now, she will protect us" He says.

I take a deep breath and close my eyes and imagine mom's beautiful face, how she would always tease me over the littles things, but still love me endlessly.

"Alright kiddo let me sleep I need it" Dad says. "Haven't you slept for like 50 years?" I ask. "No, it's basically just been me thinking with my eyes closed" He says. my mouth makes an 'O' shape and I leave his room.

I don't know why I feel a small pain in my chest like something bad is going to happen, but I don't know what. I don't know what could possibly happen. It just feels horrible and I don't like it at all.

I walk back to my room and see Zander on the floor watching the movie. I cuddle up next to him and he kisses my head "Where were you?" He asks. "With dad, we cleared things up it was hard, and it took a while but he's a little better" I say.

"That's great!" He says and hugs me tightly. 

"Zander" I say 

"Yes sunshine?" He says. 

"I don't know why, but I feel horrible, like there's a pain in my chest and a huge urge to wanna cry and I feel betrayed for no reason I just I don't know" I say

"It's okay, It's okay, the feeling will go soon I promise" He says. 

"But, what if it doesn't?" I say. 

"What is it that you feel betrayed from?" He asks.

"Like, I'm not loved like I thought I was, like if I wasn't worth it" I say.

 "Aurora, It's okay, it'll be okay, I promise" he says. I nod and rest my head on his chest.

It feels as if I'm not your only one, Zander.