Of Pinstripes And Potions

Third Afternoon

James thinks that the peculiar urge to kiss Regulus will pass, and it mostly does. With Regulus' departure getting closer by the hour, he doesn't have time to watch the way his dark eyelashes cast shadows across his cheeks in the dim afternoon light, or notice how little animosity is left when Regulus looks his way. He's too busy instead amending his plan, thinking of a way to achieve the same goal without endangering any of the unsuspecting muggleborn girls. He supposes a half-blood might do, but it still doesn't rule out the risk of some crazed Slytherin attacking them for it. But he still thinks something staged like that will be better, doesn't think Regulus is the type to uncoil the desperation and hurt within him aloud like Sirius did, can't see him leaving without a little push.

Whether or not Regulus knows he's still thinking about it, he doesn't know. He's only thankful that Regulus hasn't voiced any suspicions about James' earlier thoughts. The boy has eaten everything Pomfrey has put in front of him, and kept it all down, which is... good. Really, he knows that he shouldn't wish it were otherwise, wish that Regulus was still poorly enough to need to stay under observation. But Pomfrey made no such promise of leaving to James, and he doesn't know how he's supposed to sit in the hospital wing alone and anxious of what's going on outside, while Regulus is left to fend for himself. The possibility of telling Sirius everything Regulus has told him, letting him keep an eye on his brother crosses James' mind, but the conversation never goes well when he rehearses it in his head. Sirius is always too angry to hear him out, or throws his head back in laughter, pleased that his brother is having such a terrible time. James doesn't know which is more likely.

"What are you going to do about Snape?" He asks, when he's sure the silence is about to suffocate him. Regulus sighs, and James knows that he regrets telling him about it in the first place. He's shown as much many times over, but fortunately for James, still can't take it back. Not unless he's planning on obliviating him.

"I'm not going to do anything. He's not stupid enough to try again any time soon."

"You're not denying that you think he'll try something again, though."

"If I don't respond to his wishes, yeah, probably." James doesn't know which is more infuriating, the ease with which he says that, or the shrug that accompanies it.

"So?"

"So, what? Unless you've any ideas better than your last, I don't see what there is to do, Potter." James doesn't push it any further, both because he's back to being 'Potter', and because he hasn't come up with any better ideas. Though he feels the desire to talk to Regulus through the day, there's very little either of them have to say to each other. Sirius is a tricky subject, and Snape is obviously off-bounds. He'd talk about Quidditch, except he worries the conversation will sound forced, that Regulus will question why he's so desperate to hear his voice in the quiet daytime, which for some reason feels more inappropriate than when it was dark and they were whispering across the small space between beds. Would he believe that it's just because James can't stand the quiet? Would James believe it?

The time comes around much faster than James is hoping it will, and Regulus goes to the bathroom to dress. James doesn't know why, it's not as though they haven't both shared a dorm with other boys for their entire school life. Not as if James would be watching. Even after that strange moment with Remus, he'd never noticed his body for any more than the unhealed wounds they had to worry about after a full moon, or the way he'd grown tall before any of the others and struggled to fit beneath Jame's cloak. As much as the urge apparently strikes him now to kiss boys, he doesn't think he really needs to think about that until it strays into the realm he imagines it did for his friends. There must been something about the Black brothers that inspires it, if his inkling about Remus and Sirius is correct.