Love, Aristotle

chapter 6

Damon

It was seven and I was freaking the fuck out. Nervousness arose and I was standing in front of my closet, trying to fucking find something nice to wear for her.

I had less than an hour and I needed time to prepare. I wanted tonight to be perfect. I wanted her to look at me, eyes sparkling.

I knew she'd love me no matter what. Even if I was an ant. But I wanted to make an effort for her.

Tonight was going to be special, like all the times we spent together.

Something felt off though. She had that distant look in her eyes this afternoon when I saw her, she was thinking hard about it. Whatever it was.

She'd been this way for a while now. Constantly biting her lip, digging her nails into her palms. I knew her well enough to know that she wasn't all right.

I did everything I could to ease her mind, to give her a break. I'd let her use me as an escape, but that wasn't the case. It was more than that. Around me, she seemed better. Everything was okay.

I wanted know what the fuck was hurting her and I'd make sure it would never be able to again.

I would burn down the world for her. I'd shield her from the darkness, if she'd let me. There was something distant about her, like she was scared. Not necessarily of me though.

I could see it in her eyes.

I would never hurt her. And it never occurred to me but maybe she was scared of hurting me?

Love was complicated. If it wasn't then it wasn't love at all.

What I felt for her, it was more than love. Did that scare her? After all, in the end, it was either I'd hurt her or she'd hurt me.

I desperately wanted to talk about it with her, communication was key, she had told me.

She was fighting a storm in her mind, by herself but she wasn't alone. I was with her, whether she knew it or not.

I knew she could handle herself so for now, I'd give her time.But I swear to god, if I find out why she's hurting, if I find out what's been bothering her, if there's a weight on her shoulders that could crush her, break her. I'd burn it all down. I clenched my jaw at the thought.

I made a promise, one I was going to keep even if things went downhill for us—not like I'd ever let that happen. I was hers, her love. I was going to protect her from the cruelness of this world.

But hell, it fucking hurt to look her in the eyes and see that distant expression. She seemed so far away from me. She was screaming inside, and I could hear it all. Unable to help her, I didn't know how. And it killed me. I was scared to let go, she could slip away from my embrace at any moment.

Hold on baby.

I'll find a way.

And if I did, would she take my hand? Or will she leave?

My shit work schedule wasn't helping either. We never even got to spend much time together. I'd see her three times a week, four if I was lucky.

I had late shifts and hated it. Unfortunately, I couldn't quit. I needed the money.

I hadn't told her this, but I was saving up. It was going to be me and her, alone, in a place only we knew. I'd take her away from it all. Somewhere safe. To see that genuine smile on her face.

Yeah, I noticed. I noticed everything about her. Couldn't help it. I saw the way her smile faltered. She'd be talking to me about something, she seemed happy I think. Then a moment later, her smile would fade, a frown replacing it. I'd kiss it away, hoping it was enough.