And this is happening why?~the hobbit crossover

haha what.

Damn my mattress is hard Maggie thinks to herself after a not so comfortable sleep.

Why is it so Fucking cold? Did I leave my window open again?

She sits up with her eyes still closed and tries reaching for her bed side table for her phone only to be met with air which gets her attention.

Peaking her eye open she looks around at the forest she is laying in.

"Oh hell no. Bitch you better wake the fuck up cause I know were not in wilderness! We are in our bed and this is just a dream and soon I'm gonna wake up to my alarm." She says rationalizing with herself.

"Who is she" hearing whispering she turns her head in the direction it came from only to see nothing.

"Where did she come from?"

"What is she." Now that got her attention

"Da fuck you just say, 'what is she' you better hope I don't find your sorry ass and show you what the hell I am! Fake as bitch" she yelled into the direction she keeps hearing it.

"What foul language for a lass"

Lass? Who are these people, who says lass anymore? They must be old. She thinks to herself

"Can you just like, I don't know come out and show yourself so im not talking to nothing?" She questioned the voices 

"Oh you hear that were nothing!" A husky voice calls out as there's ruffling in the group of trees and bushes before someone steps out.

"I...was not expecting that." She says truthfully as 12 lumber jack people reveal themselves along with what looks like a old little elf with a white hair and beard, a tall guy with a harry potter hat and a little shoeless person.

"Well what were you expecting 13 dwarves, a hobbit, and a wizard to look like." A red haired guy with a braided beard asks.

"How was I supposed to know you guys were what? Dwarves? I mean the wizard I get but...hobbit? Dwarves?" She shrugs at them

"What might your name be lassy?" The little white haired 'dwarf' asks.

"My names Maggie, but my friends if I had any would call me maggs, or magg-n-cheese! Who are you?" She questions back.

"Balin, at your service" my service?

"Um?...you too?"

"What kind of name is magy?" The bald one asks

"A girls name" she shot back "and its Maggie."

"I was just askn' " he replied making her feel bad that she snapped at him

"Oh, sorry-" "but it is a weird name" he smirks

"Oooh? And what might your perfect name be?"

"Dwalin." His reply was short as he proudfully announced his name

"Oh oh oh! How dare you make fun of my name when you're sounds like a two year old trying to say drawing! Like 'oh Billy! What are you doing?' 'Dwalin'" she glares back at him her response getting a few chuckles from 2 younger looking ones.

"And who are you two crayola and cra-z-art?" She asks chuckling at her own joke before realizing it was stupid and stops.

"No? Fili-" "and kili" "at your service" they say finishing together at the end

"Okay, not to be rude or anything because its nice of you to say this but weird and confusing at the same time...why are you guys at my service?"

"..."

"Well, don't talk all at once." She rolls her eyes

"Anyway, my names Maggie-" "we know" 'dwalin' states.

"Um...that's not creepy at all, I mean like I've only just seen you guys in like my entire life so, um...I don't know how you know my name and its kind of weird-"

"Uh, miss Maggie, you have already informed us of your name" a guy with brown hair and one of those hats with the flaps on the side says hesitantly

"I did?" Maggie asks genuinely confused

"You don't...remember" the short 'hobbit' asks

"Nop-" she was about to reply with a negative before seeing their expressions making her quickly change her answer.

"-oh wait! I remember, you know sometimes things just go straight over my head." She laughs nervously.

What the hell are these people talking about?

And where the fuck am I?