A Millions Roses | | L.S AU

Chapter Nine

"Nothing goes as planned, Everything will break. People say goodbye, in their own special way. All that you rely, and all that you can fake will leave you in the morning... and find you in the day."

Chapter Nine; Space

Louis hadn't realized that he had fallen asleep until he woke up, yawning like a small child and fluttered his eyes open as he was met with an orange glow. His body feelt so relaxed from the best sleep of his life and he breathed in.a large breath, slowly letting it go as he soaked in his surroundings - feeling content. The covers were warm on his sun kissed skin, and he felt like he never wanted to leave this bed. Wait! Bed?

He was on his feet in a swift movement, nearly tripping as he was pulling his boxers up his skinny legs and searching for his clothes. F.uck, f.uck. f.uck, f.uck, f.uck, f.uck He thought, pulling at his hair before he found his pants neatly folded on Harry's night stand and he pulled the tight pants up his legs and pulled on his shirt. He looked down at the sleeping boy, his body curled into sheets, the olive skin on his back was left defenseless against the cold, and he looked like a pure angel. A lump logged it's way into Louis' throat because no, he fucked up. Still, he couldn't stop himseld from pushing the sweaty curls from his forehead, and leaning down to leave a soft kiss on his plump lips. His lilac eyelids fluttered, causing Louis to take quick steps backward and gathering the rest of his belongings; all while willing himself not to cry. His chest was stinging and his lungs felt like they no longer worked as he slipped into his vans and slipped on his jacket ― that still smelled of vanilla ― before climbing down the ladder and physically running until he couldn't breathe.

How could he let this happen? How could he let his guard down so easily? Louis already felt cold being out of the boys embrace and that was bad. That was really bad. How would he ever be okay after this? How could either of them be okay? If he faced Harry again, Harry would want to know what they are now... but Louis can't be what he needs! He just can't... Louis needed to leave today. He couldn't risk seeing Harry one more night, he couldn't risk his heart; as selfish aa it sounds. He couldn't bare putting it on the line even though Harry already had it,gripping it tightly in those large calloused, yet oh so lovely finger tips. Louis left it in his room, lying on that bed next to the younger boy...

Louis couldn't breathe as he stumbled to his knees in tears. He carried himself to a park bench, far enough away from Harry's house and pulled his knees to his chest in heavy tears. Louis hadn't cried in so long, but he felt like his heart was under so much pressure as it knocked against his chest. His eyes were burning and he hated the silence as the park was still, the ark he had met the curly lad in first - and now his mind hammerd with memories of that first rose. He hated himself for wanting to go.. He hated himself for not being strong and not being brave enough to stay. Still... some part of him hoped Harry missed him as much as he missed the curly haired boy in this moment. He wasn't ever afraid of being alone...

until now.

-

Harry shuffled in his sleep, half asleep half awake with a small smile on his plump lips. He was expecting to bump into the older boy, and feel his burning skin against his own, but frowned when he was met with a warm - empty surface. Why did he always have to go? His heart sank in his chest as his eyes searched the room. Harry actually couldn't believe it, even after the night they shared, he was still running away...

He thought that maybe... since Louis had admitted that he loved him...and maybe ,since Louis had even showed him how much... just maybe Louis would stay. Just once... someone would stay.

Harry knew it was a crazy to think that Louis would even consider thinking about it. Louis had made him cry over this subject many times, hurt his feelings, blatantly told him that he could not stay and Harry was so desperate to keep him; that he gave the older boy all of him, all he had to offer; and still it seemed he wasn't enough. Maybe this was the final blow to the ship that would leave Harry drowning in those dangerous oceans in Louis' eyes. The ones that were locked on him, spilling all his secrets into Harry last night, the ones that plead and fluttered closed with such euphoria in the younger boys arms.