A Millions Roses | | L.S AU

Chapter Nineteen

"Counted all my mistakes and there's only one, standing out in the list of things I've done. All the rest of my crimes couldn't come close, to the loose on your face when I let you go..."

Chapter Nineteen; Priorities

Louis P.O.V

"So... How have you been?"

"Nick." Louis sighed angrily, sitting back into Nick's filthy couch. Actually, it was pretty neat, and quite soft but Nick was a filthy person, so by default. Everything in his house was to. "Don't play these fucking games with me, you know how I've been."

"Louis, I honestly didn't mean to hurt you. I know it seems empty now, but I'm honestly sorry. I was just confused -"

"Confused?" Louis chuckled bitterly, throwing his head back in laughter. "How the fuck were you confused? I was the one who was forced to come to terms with my sexuality. I didn't know why it was happening, I thought something was wrong with me. As if that shit wasn't scary enough - you made it hell." Louis shot at him.

"Louis! Just fucking listen okay? I was confused. I was. I liked you, I like you. I freaked out when you admitted it, yeah I was being a dick, but I was a dumb high school jock! I am owning up to my shitty mistake, but I felt miserable after I hurt you. You left, and everyone kept telling me you had offed yourself -"

"As if I'd end my life of a selfish prick like you. I honestly don't give a fuck if you like me because I finally have something good in my life. I finally have someone I love, and the only thing standing in between me and that person - is fucking you!" Louis yelled, his face red as he huffed cutely.

"Are you even listening to yourself? You're letting me get in the way of your happiness, still? After all this time. You must want something from me, if you came all this way to find me." Nick said, holding the ice pack to his jaw and looking intently at Louis. "Maybe you're just not over me."

"I'm here because I run away from every feeling I have with another person because I'm so scared they'll hurt me like you did! But I'm so fucking sick of this, of you." Louis scoffed, "Not over you? Please. You were nothing but a living nightmare."

"You can't possibly believe that. We had an amazing time as friends - and you know it. All the nights we spent in my room, counting the posters on my wall and listening to The Fray. I remember you used to sing along to that one song, I'll look after you. I loved listening to it, and the way you blushed when I teased you about it."

"You were right. You were a huge dick back then. Why did I even like hanging out with you? All you did was tease and make fun of me." Louis arched an eyebrow, thinking things over. "You were one of my only friends... Shame."

"You wanna know something? I've had loads of time to think and, I can't get you out of my fucking mind either. In fact, you see those boxers over there?" Nick pointed to a corner in his flat, boxes stacked high. "I was going to move back... To find you. To say I'm sorry, to do something because we could be awesome together. Yeah, I just realized that but it's true. I can't help but want those nights back because I never realized how much they meant to me until they were gone."

"You're so delusional, and please - don't touch me." Louis said through gritted teeth once Nick scooted closer to him on the couch. He put the ice pack down, causing Louis to wince at what he had done. He shouldn't feel bad, but he does. "I should really go. You don't even deserve my time, you apologized. I'm over it. Maybe we could've been something, who knows. But you've fucked up any chance of that. Like I said, I'm over it."

"Are you Louis?" Nick said, moving closer despite Louis' wishes. He could tell Louis was thinking things over, and that was exactly what he wanted. "Everyone deserves a second chance, don't you think?"