Chapter 19

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sam pov

"my unit is getting deployed...i have to leave by tomorrow night."

mom's face went white.

she gulped, "what?" she said.

"i'm so sorry mom...i just got the call. god i'm so sorry."

she took her hand off of my back and looked away.

"mom. say something. please." i begged her.

"what do you want me to say sam? congratulations? you're going back to that hell hole to get murdered?"

"mom. i said it once and i will say it again. i will not get killed mom. i made it through the first time and i can do it agai-"

"LAST TIME YOU WERE IN BOOT CAMP SAM! YOU GOT A LITTLE TASTE OF WHAT WAR WAS LIKE! THIS TIME YOU ARE AN OFFICER! A CAPTAIN OF A UNIT! YOU COULD EASILY GET SLAUGHTERED OUT THERE AND NOW NOT ONLY WILL I LOSE MY MOTHER BUT I WILL LOSE MY DAUGHTER TOO! CAN'T YOU JUST STAY?!"

i sighed, "i can't just stay mo-"

"try. please sam. i need you here. i can't lose you too. not now sam. not ever." she whispered and collapsed at my feet.

she was staring at me, tears streaming down her cheeks.

i looked away, afraid that if i made eye contact i would crumble.

"sam." she whispered, tugging at my hands.

i looked at her and grabbed my phone.

"i'll call the chief. i'll see what i can do okay?"

she nodded quickly and i stood up and grabbed her hands, pulling her up with me and kissed her forehead, "no promises though mom."

she nodded, "okay..."

i walked out of the room and called my captain/chief.

"hello?"

"afternoon sir. it's captain swift."

"Swift! what can i do for you?"

i sighed, "well sir i wanted to talk to you about my deployment tomorrow."

"what about it?"

"well i was going to ask if it is possible for me to push back my deployment because my grandmother was diagnosed with cancer and my mother is in a bad state right now and-"

"Swift. i'm sorry but there's nothing i can do. we need your unit down there in battle swift. if you want to stay home. it's either the military or your job." he said and hung up.

i closed my eyes and sighed.

mom was standing behind me.

"sam."

i turned around and she was shaking.

"there's nothing they can do mom. i have to go or i lose my job."

"then lose it sam! i need you here please!"

i shook my head, "mom it's not that easy. i love the army. i'm happy where i am."

"but i'm not sam! i am not happy! i want you home where i know you're safe!"

"look. i'm sorry. but i am not quiting the military mom. i love my life right now and i will not get hurt. i'm okay. i will be okay." i said and grabbed her wrists.

she collapsed into my arms and sobbed.

i held her tightly in my arms, "it's okay mom. i will write as much as i can okay? and i will call. alright? i promise."

she nodded into me and i led us to the couch and held her in my arms for a while.

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"mom. i have to go okay? i need to tell selena so i have to get a flight back home to LA." i whispered.

she sniffled and nodded, "okay." she whispered weakly.

i kissed her forehead, "i love you so much mom. i will be okay. and grandma is strong. she can pull through."

she sighed and nodded, "i love you too."

i smiled smally and left to the airport.

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"sel?" i said as i walked into our bedroom to selena reading great expectations by charles dickens.

she looked up at me and smiled.

"hey my gorgeous wife. how was new york?"

"it was good. my mom is still there though. i felt bad but i needed to come home to tell you something."

"what is that?" she said and smirked.

i sighed, "my captain called me today sel and...i have to get deployed again. i leave tomorrow night."

she put her book down and looked at me, "tomorrow?"

i nodded and got my uniforms out and my bag.

"sam. please tell me you are joking i mean...we're married sam! you can't just leave so soon! why so soon?" she said, standing up.

"well usually in battle people die and they need other units to go over there to help out when the ones before them died already."

"SAM! STOP IT!"

"what?" i asked.

"STOP TALKING ABOUT DEATH! IT'S NOT A JOKE TO ME!" she screamed, tears flowing.

i put my stuff down and wuickly made my way over to her and held her in my arms, "i'm sorry. i didn't mean to. i wasn't thinking sel i'm sorry okay? i just want to spend my last night with you. okay? i'm sorry." i said into her hair.

she sobbed and gripped my shoulders.

"please don't go." she whispered.

i held her tighter, "i'll be back selena i promise. i love you so much. so so much. i will never leave you. i will always come back to you selena i promise you that. my love for you is stronger than anything and i will not give up until i come home. i will be okay."

she put her face in my chest and wrapped her arms around my stomach, her hands connecting behind my back.

i held her waist and swayed us back and forth while i rubbed her lower back, trying to sooth her.

i pulled away from her and wiped her tears.

"don't cry okay? what i said to my mom is the same for you. i will write to you as much as possible and i will call you."

she nodded and wiped her continueous tears.

"let's go to bed ya?" i said and smiled.

she smiled and nodded.

i pulled her over to the bed and threw her on, making her squeal and laugh, "sam!"

i smiled, "there's my smile." i said and kissed her passionately while i started stripping selena of her clothes.

damn what a last night home.

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sorry it's kinda short and...horrible but hey. i got good days and bad days right?

lol review and comment...even though this one sucked lol

~stay fearless~

caleigh <13

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