Salvis Oneshots🧍

intrusive thoughts 🩹

trigger warning: mention to blood, self-harm, knives

disclaimer: this is not in the canon universe, and i headcanon that sal has schizophrenia or psychosis, and as someone who experiences psychosis i can guarantee i know what im talking about.

The last few days felt like a blur, time moved by fast and sleeping felt like a chore. It was hard for Sal to keep up, whether it was with his friends or even school, he felt lost and behind. His eye focused on the whiteboard in front of him, the math equation spiraling into pictures and doodles, distant music playing even with no earbuds in his ears. He scratched the back of his neck, his leg bouncing on the chair leg and making an audible squeaking noise. He felt eyes burning in his head, everybody was watching him and he knew it, everyone was watching and they all hated him. His mind screamed, shouted, and whispered to him all at the same time, the teacher's voice barely getting through to him. The bell ringing was the only thing that saved him from the dreaded stares, his muscles feeling like hundreds of weights beating down at him. He stood from his seat, gathering and putting all his things away in his bag. His hand paused and eyes looked down at his pencil.

Blood is on your arm, you carved into your skin, you have lead poisoning, you're dying.

Sal swallowed hard as he quickly put it away and threw his bag over his shoulder, his head beginning to give a dull ache in the side of it. This time, as the boy left the classroom in a hurry, someone really was watching him. Travis Phelps stood in the back of the class, his eyes narrowed in both concern and fake annoyance. He's never seen his newly-made friend in such a distraught state, and it made him uncomfortable in a way. After having an emotional conversation and finally taking up Sal's offer of hanging out, the blonde finally decided to introduce himself as a positive influence in Sal's life, and it's actually worked out a lot. His feelings haven't gone away, and now that they're way closer than before, they're only getting stronger. Travis threw his bag over his own shoulder and walked out of the classroom, his eyes trailing across the looming crowd of students. The blue-haired boy was no where to be found at all, and it was only more worrying. The boy wandered his way down the hall, his eyes locking on the small group of students in the corner of the lobby.

"Hey..did you guys see where Sally went? He was acting weird in math today." Travis said as he made his way over to the group of four. Larry gave him a stern look, his expression contorted into one of hesitance. He still wasn't enjoying having him in the group, and he wasn't happy that his brother was subjecting himself to such a dick, but he couldn't argue if he was happy; that's all he wanted. The group looked between each other, seeming to all disagree and shake their heads.

"I do agree though, he seemed kind of upset." Neil added in, his hand wrapped around Todd's waist. The ginger nodded in agreement with his boyfriend, adding that Sal ignored them all day. The mere thought of Sal being this upset didn't sit right with Travis, his gut tightening with anxiety. He mumbled a small thank you before leaving the group, his steps moving in a faster pace than before. Something wasn't right, and he wasn't going to let Sal handle it alone.

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Dishes piled up in the kitchen sink, the counters covered in stains, and the floor unswept. Sal dropped his bag near the front door after closing it, his expression full of dread and remorse. He shuffled his feet across the dirty floorboards and made his way to the bathroom, his stomach burning and head pounding. He lifted his hands up to unbuckle his prosthetic, the mask falling into his hands as he slowly looked up at his reflection. It was disgusting, he was so unbelievably ugly. The peeled skin from his nails picking at it, the missing tissue showing off his teeth on one side, and a dent in his jaw from more missing skin. His eyes burned, his hands clutching the mask tightly before tossing it onto the ground. He felt his chest rise and lower faster, anger rushing through him and guilt pooling from his brain. Why was he like this? Why was everybody watching him all the time? What was this constant music playing in his ears today? He wanted it to stop, he wanted all these nightmares and hallucianations to stop and leave him alone. He hadn't realized how hard he was gripping his hair until he felt strands of it between his fingers as he pulled away, tears pooling in his eyes. He let out a sound of frustration before tossing the hair in the sink and storming out of the room. He threw his door open before slamming it closed, not caring if his neighbors complained. He paced around his room, his legs feeling weak and tears streaming down his scarred cheeks. There was someone in his closet, there has to be, somebody was out there watching him. He brought himself over to the corner of his room, his body sliding down the wall and his knees tucking themselves against his chest.

{At the same time}

Travis hesitantly brought his hand up and gently knocked his knuckles against the wooden door of Sal's apartment. He already tried calling and texting him a bunch of times, so it's not like he was coming unannounced, kind of. After a minute or so, he went to go knock again, but the sound of a door slamming filled him with undescribable anxiety. Something was urking him to go in, no matter if it was intrusive or not, and he did. He slowly turned the door knob and stepped inside, his eyes looking around the messy apartment. He certainly wasn't judging their living situation, so the mess didn't bother him, it was the mask set on the floor in the bathroom across the apartment that caught his eye. He made his way over and leaned down to pick it up, the material old and starting to wilt away. The sight made him frown, his eyes looking into the sink to find a small bunch of electric blue hair sitting near the drain. It was completely tangled and definitely didn't look cut, worry only consuming Travis more. At the sound of crashing coming from the room next door, he quickly focused back into the situation and rushed to the door of said room, pushing it open. The room was completely trashed, clothes were thrown everywhere and posters were ripped to shreads from the wall. Sal sat cowering in the corner, his nails digging into his biceps as he muttered quietly to himself under his breath. Travis felt his heart break at the sight, his body slowly moving over to the boy in distress. As soon as Sal noticed the boy, his eyes widened and his hand quickly moved behind his back to grab a pocket knife he had hidden behind him for defense, and pointed the open blade at the blonde.

"Get away from me! Go away, I don't have what you want!" He shouted, his voice strained but full of fear as it quivered. Travis quickly shot his hands up, his heart racing against his chest. He had no idea what was going on, and it was horrifying. He's talked to Ash before and she explained how Sal had 'episodes', could this be one of them? He had no idea how to process and handle his own emotions, so helping Sal felt nearly impossible, but he wanted to try.

"Sal..it's just me. It's Travis, remember? We ate lunch together last Tuesday, we had sushi after school in the park, do you remember?" He recalled, his feet slowly aproaching the other. He made sure to be slow, barely noticable to the panicked boy in front of him. The blue-haired boy stayed quiet, his hands trembling but still pointing the blade at the other. Travis swallowed hard, fear rising in his chest. He couldn't deny that he was scared of Sal in these moments, and that he had no idea how to handle this situation, but he couldn't leave Sal alone like this. If he really wanted to show how much he cared about him, this was how he could prove it. Travis thought to himself for a moment before slowly sitting down on the cluttered floor, a hesitant smile plastered on his face.

"You ordered a california roll and two miso soups, and you gave one to me because I accidentally ordered the spicy one instead and burned my tongue. I remember you laughed at me because I couldn't handle the spice, even if it wasn't that bad." He added, his smile becoming more genuine the more he recalled the memory of the week before. Sal's expression seemed to twitch into one of confusion and loss, the knife slowly lowering and his eyes searching around for something in his lap. He seemed to loosen up, but his hand was still tightly holding the blade. Travis took this as an opportunity to slowly crawl over, the other seeming to not care anymore. He hesitantly wrapped his arms around Sal, his grip tight but careful to not scare him. Sal felt humiliated and embarrassed, but god this felt so nice. His dad was too emotionally absent to know what to do during these times, and he knew Travis had no experience with expressing emotions, so he felt so stupid. He's only been friends with Travis for just a few months, so that fact alone was humliating enough. The rubbing of Travis's hand on his back and his head on his shoulder made emotions burst from Sal's heart, a sob breaking through his lips as he dropped the knife on the floor and gripped onto Travis' signature purple sweater. He couldn't contain himself for those few minutes he was held, and Travis just sat there and held him through it all. He slowly rocked the two, his mind racing. Was he doing this right? Was this even helping him or was it making it worse?

Sal eventually just stopped crying and sat in Travis' arms in silence and occasional hiccups. The two sat there in each other's arms, as the apartment was only filled with the sounds of Sal catching his breath from his prior meltdown. Travis didn't know when or even if he should try asking him what happened, he didn't want to set him off again.

"Are you alright?" He asked in a quiet tone, slowly pulling away from Sal to properly look down at him. His expression was blank and dull, but his eyes were still full of sadness, it physically pained Travis.

"I promise, I'm here for you, Sally."