James pov (in mind:) AYO, sussy shrek is sitting next to me. The new kid, he's fitter than my dad (if yk yk). I think he smells like sh!t but that's not why I'm covering my nose like somebody had just eaten beans and shartted in my face. I was holding it because.....I forgot to contour my nose with xx dark contour on my nose :,(.He doesn't seem to trust me, but keeps looking at my packing grey joggers.
Squidwards pov: WRSTUFDETSRDFGYLTRETYGFKRYJDFLYTSDRTJFIDYRDFIYTERWUSRDKTFGYFUD. HARDER MY SUCCULET SPONGE. IM GONNA INK.
*the bell rung*
Mr Dawson pov: EVERYONE IS DISMISSED. Except for you Donald Trump. We have... some things to discuss.
James turned to look into Shreks dusty eyes and asked if he wanted to meet after school. Shrek said yes, not knowing what James had in store for him.
*the end of the day*
James was waiting patiently for his (rlly hot) crush to come and meet with him.Shrek finally arrived and James ofc wanted to get to know him, so started asking questions.
James pov: So Shrek-
Shrek pov: Please, don't call me Shrek, only people I don't like call me that. Call me shrekky wekky woo waa.
James pov: Oh ok. So Shrekky wekky woo waa, what do you like to do as a hobby.
Shrek pov: Looking for wild onions!
James pov: Oh, do you like to cook with them?
Shrek stood there, shocked, sad, and mortified.
Shrek pov: NEVER. I love my onions. I find them to talk to them, they are my friends. UGH, nobody understands me!
They both stood there, not knowing what to say. James stood shocked the way that Shrek had snapped at him but more shocked by the fact that he found it... hot. Shrek was embarrassed, he felt bad for shouting at James, though he felt very strongly about his wild onion friends. he knew their feelings were easily hurt.
Shrek pov: I-I'm sorry I didn't mean it-
James pov: No it's fine really, I think I understand how you feel.
Shrek pov: Y-you do.
James pov: Yeah. Like somebody always has better onions than you. For me someones sausages are always thicker and juicier than mine...
Shrek pov: I'm sure you have a bigger juicy sausage than anyone here, you just have to wait for it to grow to it's full length.
They stood in silence for a moment, not knowing what to say.
Shrek pov: James. C-can I see your sausage.
