One Shots (all of the gays, some of the straights)

KarNep (sadstuck)

*I'm working on my Davesprit and Jade one shot so as for now... Have some feels >:o)*

It was a little while after the freak accident due to Gamzee going sober, Karkat was on his way to clear out Nepeta's hive. Gamzee had killed Nepeta while she was trying to get just for her moirail, Equius who had been killed moments before. Karkat was pretty upset about the incident. He really had enjoyed talking to Nepeta who always seemed to enjoy his company as well even after what all the other trolls say about his anger problems, Nepeta never seemed to mind.

Karkat reaches for the door and opens it. He steps inside the dark, dusty room. He had insisted on going alone, but now he was kind of wishing he had listened to Sollux and let him come along, but he hadn't. Karkat walks in and hits the light switch. His eyes take in his old pal's room, he would never admit it, but truth be told he really misses Nepeta.

Before Karkat could get struck with all of the painful feelings from being there he puts his mind to work. He quickly grabs some boxes he brought for Nepeta's stuff and began packing her things. Usually, after a troll dies their stuff would just stay there and become lost and forgotten in time, since they had faced so many deaths they were all very use to it, but Karkat felt differently. He didn't want all of their friends to be forgotten, especially Nepeta. Karkat couldn't imagine dying and never being thought about again, it made him... Sad to think about.

Many of the trolls thought Karkat was heartless and never did anything but yell, but he was anything but heartless. Karkat yelled because he wanted to see everyone doing their best which anyone hardly ever did and it makes him mad. It makes him mad that he can see his friends true talents and abilities and they don't use them, because they can't see them. All he really wanted to do was push them hard enough to succeed... And not make the same dumb mistakes he made himself.

With him being a mutant, it was so much harder to prove to others he is worthy, and even harder to prove to himself he is not a mistake when all he does is make many. Karkat hates himself, he says he hates everyone else, but he could never hate anyone more than himself.

As Karkat puts the most important things in boxes first, he begins finding drawings. Karkat sees a paper here and there and finally realizes where they're coming from. He follows them to the desk Nepeta had in the corner of the room. Karkat looks inside the desk to see drawings of him and Nepeta and all of their friends. Nepeta was blushing in the picture while she was staring at Karkat who was looking the other way.

Karkat begins to feel tears threaten to pour out. He takes a step back and bumps into a wall. He looks up to find more drawings of her ships she would talk about from time to time. It only takes Karkat a few seconds to find the biggest picture right in the middle of him and Nepeta holding hands with a heart around them.

Instantly tears sting at Karkat's eyes and rain down. It wasn't just normal crying though, it was the crying you here when someone is dying inside, when their cries crack into a million pieces and cut deep into your heart. The cry no one has ever heard Kakrat cry before because he refused to let himself go so far. Usually he can push it deep down inside him, but he couldn't do it, not this time.

Karkat collapses to the ground and curls up in a ball under the picture and continues crying.
"I'm so sorry." His voices cracks as he repeats the three words over and over again. It was to bad he couldn't say three different words, the ones Nepeta would want to hear...

Karkat wasn't found until the next day by Sollux who had know idea what happened. He had to carry Karkat back to his hive since Karkat couldn't walk. No matter what any of the trolls did or asked him he refused to tell, but as for him, he would never be able to forget.