In the moment

Innocent victim

Jack sat at sophs bedside stroking her hair as she slept. The pain he felt in his chest was sickening but he also felt overwhelmed for the love he felt for a child he'd never met. A boy, he smiled to himself at the thought of teaching him keepy ups in the back garden, but the vision quickly smashed to pieces at the thought of the sibling he'd never get to play with. He listened to the beeps of his heart beat wondering how a world could be so cruel to someone so innocent. He looks back at Soph who's being to stir, her eyes flickering.

He squeezes her hand, 'Soph? Soph I'm here' he stretches up to kiss her forehead her eyes meeting his as he sits back down. She remains silent as her eyes fill with tears, 'it's okay, it's not your fault!' He try's to assure her but he feels like he can't find the right words.

She shakes her head as she clutches her bump with her hands. She reclines her head back and stares up at the ceiling, tears running down the side of her face on to her pillow. She felt so numb, she squeezes her eyes shut wishing it had all been a dream. She screams, but she doesn't feel like she meant to.

Jack reaches and presses the buzzer for a nurse 'Soph? What is it bab? Does it hurt? Let me help'. He watches her hysterical, he felt useless. He lets go of her hand and heads to the door, she screams louder. 'Nurse! Nurse!' His voice filling the corridor as she appears from the staff room. She hears sophs broken screams and she starts running toward the room. 'I don't know what's wrong' he says helplessly as she passes him into the room.

He stands back out the way as the nurse checks Soph. He studies her face, her face so emotionless behind the tears, mascara smeared down her cheeks and chest. He just wanted to hold her! The nurse turns to him 'we need to ultrasound her, to make sure there's no more haemorrhaging from the placenta. We'll bring the ultrasound here to make it easier for her' he agrees with her as she exists the room.

'Soph, talk to me please bab' she shakes her head and looks away from him. 'It's going to be alright, our little boy is going to alright' she grimaced at his words as she thought about their baby that wasn't okay. The one she couldn't protect. 'It's all my fault isn't it? The paps wouldn't have been badgering you if it wasn't for my fuck ups'

'THIS ISNT ABOUT YOU' she shouts still facing away from him.

He understands shes hurting, that she's mourning for their baby, he understands the pain she feels because he felt it to. Like a scene from vampire diaries when the vampires shove their hand in someones chest and pull their heart out. What he can't relate with is having growing that baby inside you and for it to be taken away. 'I love you Soph, I mean it'.
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Lads chat

Walker: jack is everything okay with your lass?

Foden: update us when you can mate, the video look brutal

Stones: I've just left the hospital with jo, she's stable but not good

Walker: surely it's illegal for them to pester her like that?

Jack: I'm sorry boys I can't talk. I'll update you when soph falls back to sleep
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The nurse enters wheeling a large machine and plugs it in next to sophs bed. She lifts her top to reveal sophs belly, black with bruising. He looks at the nurse with worried eyes and she nods back answering his silent question. She places the monitor on sophs belly 'I'm really sorry Soph I know it's not the most comfortable of scans right now' she watches the screen as jack watches Soph tense and grimace at the pain. She turns the screen round to show Soph and jack, 'this is twins A, everything is looking fine, there's no bleeding surrounds their sack at this stage but we will need to monitor it closely'
Jacks looks at her 'at the other twin' she nods her head again she she moves the monitor across sophs belly.
'This is twin B, as you can see from this darkened area to the left there has been a rupture to the sack due to impact. Unfortunately on admission we couldn't detect a fetal heartbeat. I'm so sorry' she looks just as heart broken as Soph. He felt for her, a job that can come with such lows as well as highs.
'What will happen now?' He queries
She removes the monitor from Soph and wipes the gel gently off her belly 'as each twins has their own sac, we don't have to operate at this stage. However there can be complications, I have gone through these with Sophie already, but I can understand that it's a lot to process.' She reaches over for some paper work 'I did give these to the other lady that was here, it's full of all the information you need. The main thing is that we will be monitor Sophie and the baby regularly so we can have the quickest action on anything that may arise'

Jacks looks at the paper work and then back to the nurse before he thanks her for everything she's done. He sits back down in the visitors chair. 'We're going to get through this Soph, we'll get through it together' he says softly to her as another tear falls from her eyes.
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Lads chat:

Jack: *voice note*
Jack: our sons heart beat!

Phil: heart beats as strong as his dads legs!

Jack: there's no easy way to say it but unfortunately, due to sophs fall we've lost one of the twins. Our hearts are broken, you can imagine but this little man is healthy and fighting and we're thankful he's okay!

Walker: I'm so sorry jack!

John: we're here if you need us lad, anything at all!

Phil: mate, like John says anything you need! Me and bec send our love to you both!